So Stressed

Having so much stress at the moment again. My sons ex partner is preventing us from seeing my 4 year old grandson. She was the wrong doer in the first place, had a drink problem and we had him for some time. Then let her have him as long as she was regularly checked by social services.

It's strange that my Parkinsons started 4 years ago and now 4 months into hyperthyroid. I wasn't feeling to bad and my carbimazole was reduced a few weeks ago from 20 to 10mg. After a day of accusations coming though a third party yesterday and my anger and frustration at social services not being reachable, I woke this morning with worse tremors and ache in every part.

Stress affects my PD as well as my thyroid. How do I cope when my heart is breaking.

That little boy said to me couple of weeks ago, Nanny, I don't know what I would do without you.

How do I cope without going downhill health wise?

9 Replies

  • I loath adults that use children as pawns as their way of revenge. Your sons ex is very unstable and SS needs to act, are you going to try and get hold of them today? Is she also stopping your son from seeing him because, unfortunately grandparents have no legal rights over grandchildren (which to my mind is a crime in itself), it will be through your son that will be your only sure way of seeing him again. Your son needs to get advise regarding proper access arrangements that she has to stick to and when he gets access then so will you. Doing it the legal way will bring CAFCASS (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service) into it and they really take a dim view of people like your sons ex. They also take into consideration the grandparents views and feelings as they look at the whole family unit.

    I know none of ths will help you today but your need hope to keep going, so speak to your son, and the SS and draw up a plan of action. Write to your grandson telling him how much you love him, so that the bond you have with him remains strong, and dont let this awful, immature, nasty woman call all the shots - if she is a drinker then you know yourself that she will want rid of her son at times so that she can do what really interests her, and thats drink, but your son needs to sort things out leglly so she cant keep playng mind games with you, your son and, most importantly, that poor ittle boy.

    I know how your heart is breaking as one of my daughters used to regularly use my grandchildren against me, it's called emotional blackmail.

    My thoughts are with you.

    Moggie x

  • Thank you Moggie. We did contact Social Services yesterday but they didn't get back to us. There is a care order in place and both my son and his ex have joint parental responsibility. I can't say I have much faith in social services anymore. Hoping to get some help today.

    If I told you the whole story you would find it unbelievable. Being a mum of five, grandmother to six and an ex children's Nannie I find it all absolutely ridiculous. You feel so helpless

    If she decides not to answer the phone for us to make arrangements to see my grandchild, we are stuck. Even though there are days written in the agreement.

    Will let you know how it goes. Once again thank you.


  • Can your son not go back to his solicitor and get them to write to your son's ex. Maybe the threat of being taken back to court will go some way to making her act as a sensible, caring human being - unfortunately she knows how to hurt you and is using it to its full potential.

    Good luck with the SS today - like you I dont have any faith in this service as, a lot of the time, they seem to be living on another planet.

    Please do keep me updated wont you.

    Moggie x

  • Moggie

    Bless you.

    Unfortunately my son has gone for a job interview today which could take some time . He had to give up his job to care for his son when she went on one her alcoholic binges. Hopefully he will be back in time to ring the SS. Which sometimes feels as if that's what they are when you are banging your on a brick wall. They have such an attitude.

    Will keep in touch. X

    Sorry for errors tremors really bad today.

  • You need to look after yourself and get back to where your health was before all this stress took hold.

    I dont do stress very well either, end up feeling really ill, but sometimes life is stressfull so finding way of dealing with it is important.

    Moggie x

  • I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through, I don't know that anything can help, it sounds heartbreaking. Sometimes things do improve over time, perhaps you can find the strength from somewhere to try to get yourself well so at least you're ready and well enough in case things improve regarding access to your grandson. Sometimes when you're feeling well you can see a way through that you couldn't see before. Try to get well, it will be worth it. Sending you the best of luck.

  • Thank you. Going to do some housework and play some music to help me switch off for awhile.

    I do want to get well. The PD is bad enough without the added thyroid problems adding to it all.


    Is it possible this link could help you in some small way - can feel your pain.....

  • Thank you for caring. Really appreciate it. It does help when your feeling as though your in a deep hole and can't climb out.

    She has the reins at the moment and full control, The Social Worker is out of the office again today. They promised the SS would ring my son yesterday and nothing from them. I am beginning to hate them, they are not doing their job. No wonder so many innocent children fall though the net and come to harm.

    I know my grandson is reasonably safe as he has grown up siblings. The problem with them is they hide their mothers problem. Her whole family kept it hidden for years. My son rang SS for which he's never been forgiven.


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