Having a horrible, terrible, very bad, no good, rotten day.

[seekinghealth97]

Today is not a good day. Last night, I broke down crying afraid for my future. You see, I'm blind and I want to be an early childhood educator, but I'm afraid no one will hire me because of my blindness. Then there's the stress at home with a roommate that isn't really nice sometimes. And my husband can be rather distant and unconcerned. On top of that, we have financial issues that make getting food hard and getting extras next to impossible...my life is a rotten mess. I don't know what to do with myself. Any suggestions where to start? I'm seeing a therapist, but she just dumped my case on an intern without telling or asking me, so I'm pretty upset about that, too.

I have PTSD (non-pcombat related), depression, anxiety, and I've been told I have borderline, though I'm not sure I believe that. I'm 34 and never finished college. I worked as a nanny in my younger days, but haven't worked in about 10 years due to disability. I want a life, but I don't know where to start.

[JayceeW]

So sorry to hear you are feeling so low. Your blindness must really be adding to your problems.

I can understand your wish to be involved in early years education, it is very satisfying. However eyes ‘in the back of your head’ are almost essential! Youngsters at this age are so unpredictable and often do not recognise danger. Having said that I would do some research into jobs that are linked to this or even try to gain some voluntary work

in a nursery setting, possibly reading to the children and see how it goes.

Whatever you decide I wish you success. It sounds as well as if you would benefit from someone to talk to. How about asking your doctor to refer you to a counsellor? They really can help.

[nossib]

It is so understandable that you feeling this way and fearful but it seems you have more than enough burden without having to carry more with others being so dismissive.

Maybe you should tell your therapist that you felt rejected by what she's done and if the 'roommate' is under your roof then you have a right to have some civility shown to you...and your husband should support you.

Give yourself permission to rest and replenish your own sense of inner worth for you definitely have it...it is often others around us who are more blind to what is really important and just know ''You '' are.