I get why Chadwick Bozeman didn’t tel... - SHARE Metastatic ...

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I get why Chadwick Bozeman didn’t tell about stage 4 colon cancer

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I am heartbroken to learn of the death of this fine young actor at 43. He was diagnosed Stage 3 in 2016 but went ahead & starred in several good movies including the lead role in Black Panther. Somehow between surgeries and treatments he still managed a rigorous acting career and was a frequent, beloved visitor to children’s wards.

His death is startling because he had not shared his diagnosis. I can’t be sure why he made that choice but I respect it. Would Hollywood have allowed him to star in major roles? Would he have been seen as a super hero if we’d known? Would it have been too hard to excel in that industry if he received that sad dog looks we ourselves recognize from others?

I think he was remarkable. I am personally glad I’ve been discreet about who knows about my MBC. His success and zest for life even after his diagnosis reinforces my own choice.

His death at such a young age is heartbreaking. I hope folks will admire his perseverance and never question his right to privacy. RIP

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17 Replies
stardust1965 profile image
stardust1965

Yes it’s so sad when someone dies so young. He seems to have lived life to the full and used his talents and strengths along the way to make the world a better place. What more can we ask from life. I have the utmost respect and understanding for those who choose to keep their diagnosis private. May he rest in peace.

AvidBooklover profile image
AvidBooklover

I agree. Who knows what marvelous roles and memories would have been denied if people, "knew."

Marthasvinyard,

Yes, I completely understand why he felt that he had to keep it a secret. I also think that it's a shame that he had to...

...When I was initially diagnosed, almost 11 years ago, I was working a corporate job, pretty high-level, and there was no hiding the fact that I was fighting cancer (bald, etc.). My dx came just after there was a re-org, from which I benefited (for the life of me, I don't understand why spellcheck says there's one "t" in that!!). During treatment and afterwards, I felt like I was fighting (more than was typical) to retain my position. Some folks on my "team" were wonderful and supportive. Others were like sharks, sensing blood in the water. It added immeasurably to my stress and my refusal to rest/take any time off.

If I had had a way to "hide" things, I would have, not that this occurred to me at the time (having had pretty optimistic view of humanity...in spite of what life shows me).

So it actually makes me sad that Chadwick, a truly powerful, admirable, and wonderful human being, likely felt that he had to be "in the closet" about this...Can you imagine the stress and "intrigue"? The excuses for missing a day of work or a meeting due to treatment? Heartbreaking, as he felt....rationally....that he had to hide what he was going through, when in an ideal world the people around him would have rallied and offered him support and love... :(

If it's a "privacy" thing, I'll say "I get it", but I only half-believe this. Like, what's the point of privacy? Is it about avoiding/capitulating to others' reactions? I'll mull this over...Thanks for triggering that process! :)

Love,

Lynn

Ntash01 profile image
Ntash01

I was diagnosed 22nd December 2019 with MBC (all I wanted was a bike for xmas😂). I started Ibrance, letrozole and zoladex in Jan 2020, so far so good 🙏

I have just started back at work and totally get the secrecy! To avoid ‘the looks’, ‘the pity’, ‘the advice’, ‘the questions’.

To be able to go to work and be ‘normal’ gives you the freedom to be ‘you’ and forget you have an incurable disease whilst being engrossed with your work and laugh with your colleagues about random things. If CBs diagnosis was public - would he have had opportunities? Who knows? I was saddened by this news, but it confirmed that my way of handling this ‘sh*tty’ thing is the right way for ME, it’s private - it’s my news...only the closest people to me need to be privy to this info - after all they live through this with me😔

I believe one day I won’t feel like me (I currently wear rose tinted glasses) and I won’t want to get out of bed or even physically be able to.... ‘till then I shall grab each day as a gift and ‘live’ as I go through treatments knowing the least conversations I can have about my health the better that is for me, I don’t want to deal with others feelings- it’s bad enough dealing with my own.

Sorry - don’t mean to offend and I apologise if I have - we all deal with things differently and no one way is the right way - just the way suits us as individuals is frankly the best 🥰 sending you all positive vibes x

in reply toNtash01

Hi,

I agree with you and am not in the least bit offended. I also want to carry on as normal by working and not having this disease hold me back or be a constant topic of conversation. I feel free to share on here, but not on a day to day basis with all and sundry. You also made a good point about having to deal with other people’s feelings once they know. It’s enough having to cope with our own emotions without also trying to figure out how to console others. After all, are we not the ones dealing with this disease and in need of support? If it’s a close family member, they need support too. But we don’t owe everybody that we know loads of support and help in coping with our diagnosis. So I can really understand why Chadwick may have chosen to keep his diagnosis to himself. That was his prerogative.

Sophie

kduck profile image
kduck in reply toNtash01

I totally agree with you, it’s my store to tell and when that times come to tell my story I will. I was so very saddened to her about Chadwick! RIP black panther, you truly fought like a warrior!

in reply toNtash01

I understand completely how you feel. I have not been secretive about my cancer because of Covid. I am at risk, and I want the people who care about me to know and hopefully take precautions. I also keep a blog, which didn't start out about cancer, but it has become a part of it. I also have a daughter who was kidnapped and never found. Sometimes I feel it is my job to stand on top of a mountain and wave a flag and say, "Hey, I'm still here! If I can do it, you can do it!"

8576 profile image
8576 in reply to

I am so sorry about your tragic loss of your daughter. Words truly escape me. You have no closure and now Cancer. You are standing on that mountain and waving your flag! I see you as do many others. Amazing.

3 Cheers, June S.

Ntash01 profile image
Ntash01 in reply to

I too am so sorry, I can’t really find any suitable words to express such a loss. We all have to do the right things for ourselves - keep shouting :-) sending you a virtual hug 🤗

in reply to

Sharon, my gosh, this is the most heartbreaking thing I can imagine! I'm so sorry for what you must be going through....Is there any possible resolution? Is there an ongoing investigation? My gosh, this took my breath away...

And I appreciate your point re: your strength/waving the flag. You have and are surviving worst than MBC...

My very best,

Lynn

in reply to

I don’t think there is. It is a well known case and I have spent almost 32 years having people telling me to not give up hope. But hope unfulfilled is the heaviest of burdens. I just want to rest.

Pbsoup profile image
Pbsoup in reply toNtash01

I could have written your post. Exactly how I feel. I think we are allowed rose colored glasses and our privacy if that’s what we choose.

Or we can scream to the rooftops.

But either way it’s our choice.

Ntash01 profile image
Ntash01 in reply toPbsoup

Glad we are coming from the same place Pbsoup :-)

I’ve been back at work for 4 weeks now, even though I know people ‘know’, they don’t really ‘know, know’... it’s fantastic no reminders of anything whilst there -even joint pains play ball until I get back home! I could continue with my sick leave with pay for another year if I wanted, but doing something I enjoy there’s no way I would do that until I had to! However, I’m in the UK and due to COVID-19...things are taking a turn for the worse again and it’s all going belly up😔

Wishing us all MBC sisters well -wherever we are with Mets (wherever they are) x

mariootsi profile image
mariootsi

What a strong amazing man he was! Inspiring. So sad he is gone.

I agree with keeping the stage IV cancer news to a VERY limited group of people. I have kept mine very private. I prefer to live life as normally as I can & be as positive as I can be. On the low days, I stay off the grid. Love everyone else’s astute comments on this topic. To Tell or Not To Tell? We each can & should choose for ourselves. There are pros & cons with each choice. ❤️🙏❤️

I was heartbroken to hear of his passing. He was an amazing actor and Black Panther gave children of colour a superhero to look up to. He opted to battle privately and I too respect him for that. I honestly don’t know how he made those movies. I have days I can’t get out of bed yet he was out there doing rigorous takes time and time again.

He is an inspiration. Ever since I have learned that he was in treatment for Stage 3 cancer while filming Black Panther, I have been slapping myself in the face saying, "Get up and do something, Sharon!"

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