Very nervous!

Hi everyone. Last Friday I came down with flu-like symptoms with headache, sore throat, cough, and loss of appetite. I had an appointment with my Oncologist today and he checked me out and said there's been a virus going around.

Well, for some reason, I left the appointment feeling very uptight thinking that my Stage 4 had progressed. My sister who was visiting with me felt similar flu symptoms. We bought cough drops, Excedrin for our headaches, and the doctor prescribed Robutussin with Codeine. But for some reason I was very upset with the whole scenario and actually had dry heaves at home later that day. I live alone and had all kinds of thoughts going through my mind! My sister tried to help me to calm down, but I finally took a mild tranquilizer and finally about 5 hrs later, I'm calming down.

Has anyone had any type of experience like this? I think I need to tell my Oncologist how uptight I'm getting. My thoughts are running away from me and I hate it! Would appreciate any feedback. Thanks. Kats3

28 Replies

  • I'm so sorry that you are feeling bad. It very well may just be the flu but I totally understand your concern. When you have our disease, every time something goes on with our body we tend to panic. I would advise you to give it a week and if you are not better or get worse, than I would be more concerned. I hope that you feel better soon. Prayers

  • I know how you feel I have been driving myself crazy with bad thoughts every ache and pain I wonder if the cancer is progressing I cry atvery happy event I go to thinking it's my last I am a real mess this time also. I try so hard to go on everyday with happy thoughts but by the end of the day and I am so tired those thoughts change but I guess in our case they should be expected we never know what each day will bring and we can continue to hope for the best hope you're feeling better soon

  • I hear you on that!!

  • I completely understand the concern but don't do this to yourself. You will become paralyzed with fear and that will affect your health and stop you from enjoying the day to day. I would ask your doctor to prescribe you a small dose of something for anti -anxiety like atavan.

  • I completely understand! Every picture I take I feel it is for a family memory!! But, if we keep thinking about this, we forget to live. No one knows what life has in store for them. None of us have control over this. Be grateful for the day, and try to create happy moments. Live your life!!

  • I've been living with MBC for 3 years now. It affects us muchbmire than physically. Ask your Dr to get you with a social worker that can get you with a psychologist. It helps to have a 3rd party (not one of your support people) to talk out loud about your fears. They can refer you to a psychiatrist if medication can help you with your anxious thoughts. This is one of my life verses. "do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

    Philippians 4:6-7

  • So true, the emotional part of this is so much harsher than the physical part most times, we have to have faith and hope, that is all we can do or our life will be consumed by this horrible disease and screwed up roller coaster ride!

  • I agree with Kuocci about asking for an anti-anxiety med. I took Paxil for about 6 months during my first year of BC...and then didn't need it any more. Also, our local Cancer Center has a trained counselor available to meet with people and talking with someone who understands does help. Journaling and music also helped me. Prayers and Hugs for you...😁

  • So sorry you're having anxiety. It happens to all of us. Take a deep breath and relax. There are a lot things going around now. I feel like if we could block our emotions we'd be better. Unfortunately battling cancer is hard and medications can make us worse when it comes to our emotions. Hopefully talking to us helps you somewhat. Praying for you.

  • Kats3... first of all you have been so inspirational to me following these posts. I would have the same advise as the other replies above mine. This diagnosis is scary and I can let myself and my emotions get out of hand at the drop of a hat or when I have an ache, etc. I completely understand how you feel. Try to wait it out, a day at a time. If you can, pray and listen to a couple good Bible pastors on tv or the internet. I can suggest a few. I'm trying hard to live for today and that's been the best thing I've learned. God bless you.

  • What amazing responses. The support from this site is immeasurable. You are so so normal to think any new pain is progression and the anxiety can be paralyzing. I'm BC Mets to both lungs, diagnosed Jan. 2016. Id been in remission for 13 years when it reared its ugly head again. I stopped chemo in November and I'm starting to feel like myself again. The chemo and other meds contribute greatly to your emotional ups and downs. You are not going crazy. Get in an anti-anxiety Med if you're not already on one, and a sleeping Med if you're not resting. It will get better. Faith is a huge part of my surviving this. I'm not just going to survive, I'm going to thrive and you will too. We are here for you. Keep us posted and know you are never alone! Big hugs!

  • Thank you everyone. I knew if I put my concerns out there, that I'd get some help and reassurance. You've all been wonderful with your suggestions. I appreciate it so much!

    Spa LadyLisa, I love that quote from the Bible about not being anxious. And yes, it would be good to find a good psychologist to help me. I need to look into this more. These people are hard to find around here.

    I have an anti-anxiety pill that I take which helps but sometimes I take it too late while I'm right in the middle of my attack!

    My problem is a full-blown head cold. Yesterday I wasn't sure and this really threw me! I'm taking cold and cough meds and am dealing with things better today. I don't know why I got so thrown off by all of this. It's irrational, but oh so real! Thank God my Oncologist is calm and doesn't overreact. I need that.

    So, thanks again everybody for replying. We're traveling an uncertain path, but with faith and each other's help we plod along and try to live optimistically. I keep everyone in my prayers. God Bless you all. Kats3

  • In february, had that HORRIBLE flu that went around and at the same time Ibrance gave me neutropenia (bottomed out blood counts) and i had pneumonia on top of all the other side effects. Fever was 102.5 for a day. Ended up in the hospital overnight. It was a very bad time and i too felt like it was the cancer taking over (it wasnt.)

    I have always had xanax on hand in case of anxiety.

    I hope you feel better soon. Its normal for things to go thru our heads. I try really hard to not put myself thru that and try to remain positive.

    Get well soon!

  • Omg is awful to feel scared. I hope it gets better.I have had many negative thoughts for the past month too. Prayers sweetie

  • Hi Kats, I can totally relate to what you went through. I don't like taking meds but have reached for the tranquilizer when I feel like I am spinning out of control. Sometimes, my husband, like your sister, will try and help but often it doesn't work. With time I have been able to deal with my fears better and find I don't need to take anything except maybe at night. Living Beyond Breast Cancer has a brochure about dealing with your emotions which you might want to look at on their web site:

    Hang in there...


  • I'm at the emergency room for the same reason, but my body is cramping and I am feeling very dizzy, and I still don't know what's going on, As you I'm stage 4 and scare

  • You still need to maintain a regular patient relationship with your Primary Care Physician. This is a perfect example of symptoms that would best be served with an appointment with your PCP.

    I trust you are feeling better by now.

  • Hi Solochabe1,

    I was wondering if my Onc was going to tell me to go to my primary doctor, but he prescribed a 5-day antibiotic for me instead. I'm glad because I didn't think I could make it to another doctor's office at that point.

    My Oncologist listened to my lungs, etc and saw that it was all upper respiratory. I'm grateful that he gave me the pills and even some for my sister! It's called a Z-pack. The medicine is supposed to stay in your body for 2 weeks. I'm feeling better, but still have congestion. I feel I need a lot of rest and liquids!

    Yes, I've taken a couple of chill pills to calm me down and feel better mentally.

    Thanks for writing. I do need to get to my primary doctor someday soon! Seems I'm always at the Oncologist's or having infusions. Take care. Kats3

  • Hi, I just realized that my last reply should have gone to PatSailsbery! Sorry. My head is still all congested and foggy! Thanks Pat for the advice about the primary doctor.


  • It's sure easy to awfulize over every bodily twinge! I suspect that a huge proportion of those of us with MBC use anti-anxiety meds, sleeping meds and/or anti-depressive meds at some point, long term or short term. I want to add that social workers who have an MSW are trained therapists and can be really helpful. So can some chaplains (esp those that are certified by the American College of Chaplains, which has high standards for education.) Do be sure to stay up to date on vaccinations! Pneumonia, flu, shingles, hepatitis as well as the old standards. But we do get colds, flu and other stuff that is going around but it sure can be scary and take our thoughts to dark places!

  • Thank you PJBinMI,

    You're right about the vaccines. I haven't had a flu shot in many years. I'm feeling somewhat better tonight. My Onc gave me a 5- round daily dosage of antibiotics and I took my last pill tonight. I'm feeling better but I really had a rough week with all the coughing and blowing and exhaustion. And the worry!

    I hope the coming week is better because this past one was SO draining! I think I do need to find someone to talk to about my medical condition. We're in a rough place in so many ways.

    I know we wish that we weren't in the situations that we're in. Accepting it is the hardest thing we need to do. I pray for strength to do this. Sharing with all of you is a big help. God Bless all of you!


  • I started Xeloda and 3 days later, was nauseous, coughing, throwing up, temperature of 101.8, pain in my stomach. I went up ER because oncologist told me to, afraid I could not take it any more, cancer spread to stomach, all the bad thoughts. It turned out I had diverticulitis, was in hospital for a couple of days. We all think everything is related to our cancer spreading. Do not get me wrong, we must be vigilant and be our own advocates, but sometimes, it really is just a cold, virus, etc. I hope you feel better

  • Hi Kat 3, Hope you are feeling better and doing fine... God bless


  • Hi, I'm feeling better with the cold but get very very tired very easily. I did a little grocery shopping this afternoon and came back exhausted! I checked to make sure that I didn't get the weeks that I'm supposed to be on my Xeloda mixed up, but no, I still have 5 more days to go before I have a week off from taking them.

    I don't like this exhausted feeling! I see my Onc on June 22 and will discuss this. It's getting me down.

    Thanks for replying. Kats3

  • All of last month I had extreme anxiety , something I am not used to. I couldn't stop thinking about this cancer and imagined it progressing....So sorry and I see I am late on his post. How are you doing now?

  • Hi Partia,

    Well, the awful coughing has stopped. I ended up with a sinus infection too. Right now I still have head congestion and am blowing. but not as bad, plus I have a loose cough. Each day I keep thinking that this will be completely gone, and it's not! It's wearing me out, and on Monday I start my Xeloda pills again. I think the cold plus being on those pills exhausts me! I was doing well before this episode.

    I called my doctor's office this morning and spoke to his nurse. She's going to tell him that I'm still not well and it's been a month. I'll find out later today what else I can do. I haven't had a cold like this in ages! But when we're on chemo, etc., our immune systems are not as strong so I guess it takes longer to recuperate.

    My friend told me to be careful about not being in crowds, etc. I think she has a point. I'm not a paranoid person but I think I need to be a little more vigilant. I do wash my hands a lot! Who knows?

    Thanks for writing Partia. I hope you're doing well.

    Best wishes! Kats3

  • Oh how you are not alone. It hits your thoughts and when it does it's hard especially when exhibiting symptoms of any kind for any reason. It's hard to pick yourself up after that kind of ordeal. I was going on a big on a trip to visit a friend the flight time was 4 hours. I knew my counts were low and frightened. Then my head went to the thought that I might get sick at her house and never return home or when I get home I would be sick and never see my best friend again. While my husband walked me through the airport I began to vomit 🤢. I felt short of breath. Full on panic mode. My husband was not going to let me go I just knew it. Surprisingly he said he knew what was happening and calmed me down. Then before you knew it I was on my way from CA to ND. I did not feel good physically and was an emotional basket case. When I arrived my best friend picked me up and on our way to her house showed me how close the Mayo Clinic was to her home. I slowly felt better. I was in a good place. I know my husband called her and talked to her. That was the first panic attack I had just last summer, 9 years post diagnosis. Not that I hadn't broken down before but, never with the physical effects only the emotional torment that I will die a cruel and early death. I have realized that death doesn't have to be cruel and I was born to live then die once the living was done. Birth wasn't immortality. I have a goal and high hopes to live a good quality of life as a survivor. This cancer isn't taking me without a fight or possibly before the bus hits me 😜. Still I cry mourning the life that was left behind in order to fight and thrive.

    I had a wonderful visit with my friend and her family. In fact that trip was the only trip I did not come home from with a cold or fever.

  • I feel like this now. I panic at almost every body reaction. Once I'm in a panic I'm not able to calm down for a long time. Then I scare myself that I've just done damage. I have Xanax and Valium and cannabis and I still feel on the edge. Could it be the lack of estrogen?

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