Last days with mum: Hi all you lovely people... - PSP Association

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Last days with mum

dollydott profile image
dollydott
β€’36 Replies

Hi all you lovely people

I can hardly believe I am writing this but our turn is finally here.

My lovely little mum has had enough and as hard as it is I've had to stop forcing her to eat and drink. She went downhill on Saturday. She was holding food in her mouth but i couldnt accept it and continued with complan and icecream the only two foods that she would accept

I finally rang our McMillan nurse and doctor on Monday and it was confirmed mum is in her final days.

Can i still give her icecream i stupidly asked not wanting to believe that she was really going to die i thought back to Monday evening the icecream was just trickling from her mouth as it melted .

So of course fast track funding kicked in straight away. I can have as little or as much help as I need. Amazing!!!!

As i wake this morning by my mums side in her hospital bed shes still with me peaceful .The little dog is curled up on her bed which I brought into mums room last night. My daughter moved in yesterday and is sleeping upstairs on standby if i need her.

Yesterday family were in and out all day sitting with mum talking to her there were buckets of tears but laughter too and memories told. She lay there peaceful throughout occasionally opening her eyes. She was listening and taking everything in.

Doris Day music played in the background all day mum looked as beautiful as ever in her pale blue nightdress with a little lipstick on of course.

How long has she got left? I dont know the doc said a few days

I pray she will stay as peaceful as she seems to be no drugs are needed at the moment

I miss her already πŸ˜₯

Sorry if ive rambled Im a bit of a mess. Keep telling mum my hayfever is playing up as I run from her room to wipe away the tears.

Thats all for now thank you for listening. I needed you this morning

Love and hugs

Lynda πŸ’œ

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dollydott profile image
dollydott
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36 Replies
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Tippyleaf profile image
Tippyleaf

Sending you lots of love st this difficult time.

Tippy xxx

Suebatt profile image
Suebatt

Hi Lynda

Thinking of you all now .Your not rambling at all.This is hard for you but try staying strong and also try to look after yourself and family too

Sending you hugs and kisses and my love

Take care

Sue x

Helen119 profile image
Helen119

Love and hugs xxxx

Spiralsparkle profile image
Spiralsparkle

Lynda

I can feel your emotion in your words.

I imagine you are feeling so many conflicting emotions. Please let that. E OK with you.

May your beautiful beloved Mum remain peaceful & slip away when the time is right for her.

I'm sending you much love.

Let those tears flow, it will help your emotions process and not be suppressed back down.

Massive Hugs

X

Satt2015 profile image
Satt2015

Dear Lynda

Sending much love at this hopeless time.

May your mum pass peacefully, that’s really the best you can ask for x ❀️

doglington profile image
doglington

Big hug for you Lynda .

A loving pain free end is what we all want. Lots of love from Jean x xx

The waiting is the worst.

Kevin_1 profile image
Kevin_1

Hi Lynda

You sound like you are doing everything so well.

Such a sadness. Like waiting for a train with someone you love on an empty night platform. Waiting for the goodbyes when they get onto it.

My heart goes out to you.

Heady profile image
Heady

Please, please let the others do the day to day caring. You just concentrate on being her daughter. I know in Steve's final couple of days, I became his wife again, not the down trodden, tired, miserable woman that I had become. I still hold the memory of those precious last days with comfort and so much love. It still feels a real privilege to have been there for him.

Let the tears flow, amongst the laughter. I will never forget Steve's and my daughter, sat on his bed, drinking champagne (it was Christmas Eve and my birthday) singing him all the rude rugby songs, he had taught them as teenagers.

Sending very big hug and much love at this difficult time.

Lots of love

Anne

kenh1 profile image
kenh1

Like you when they told me to stop the feed and the medication I felt guilty and went into denial. My kid sister (5 years younger than me) gave me a big telling off. She had been there before her husband having died with MND. When I accepted reality I was able to cope with the situation and let my wife go in peace. Which she did. P.s. My wife died in her pail blue nightdress which my son & his wife bought her for Christmas. When the undertaker asked us what we wanted her to wear at her cremation I said pail blue nightdress.

May the Lord bless you and keep you and your mum and grant you HIS peace.

Love and prayers. Ken.

AliBee1 profile image
AliBee1

Sending you love and big hug. AliBee xx

PS Nigel's fast track CHC funding came through 4 days before he died. As you say amazing!!

SewBears profile image
SewBears

I can picture myself doing the same thing with ice cream and having both of our dogs curled up on the bed with my lovely hubby. It’s not going to be easy and when I read posts such as yours about your mum I can really sympathize with you. I’m glad she seems at peace and that you’re there for her. She’s lucky to have you and family around to help her during her final stage. I’m so sorry.

Sending big hugs. Love from I SewBears

bazooka111 profile image
bazooka111

Sending love and hugs through this difficult time πŸ™πŸ»πŸ™πŸ»πŸ™πŸ»

Dear Linda, sending you & your mom & daughter hugs of support. Sure wish l had thought to blame hayfever when l was in your shoes. You are brilliant.

Do your best to take care of yourself too... get & give all the hugs you can... Granni B

Dadshelper profile image
Dadshelper

She knows everything you are doing for her, keep doing it. I hope she is very peaceful at this time.

Ron

Katiebow profile image
Katiebow

Your dear mum will probably be grateful for the end to come so that she will be free of this dreadful disease, I know my husband welcomed the end, he was too tired to fight anymore. You will be so grateful that you could all be with her and you will feel privileged to be there when the time comes, I know I look back on my husbands death with great sadness but also that the overwhelming feeling of love and warmth in the room was palpable and I will always hold onto that feeling.

Sending much love

Kate xxx

HilsandR profile image
HilsandR

You have set such a peaceful scene, Lynda - may however many days are left be as peaceful. Surround yourself with family and friends - your mum will sense a room full of love. Its heart breaking but somehow you will get through it. With love to you and your family. Hils. xx

dollydott profile image
dollydott

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words. Love and support. Your all fantastic 😊

Mum had another peaceful day yesterday but the night time came and things changed the anticipatory drugs were required as she became anxious and agitated and was crying out in distress. Truly horrible to witness .The time is now 4.30 am here and the nurses have just left after returning a second time to up the dose. True angels they were gentle and kind and made mum comfortable.

I love her so much but cant bear to see her like this. Her breathing is heavy and she seems to be fighting.

I dont want her to suffer anymore its heart breaking

Love to you all

Lynda xxxx

Sam_S profile image
Sam_S

I pray with you that she stays peaceful, comfortable and without pain.

You are already grieving and it’s very hard.

It’s just heartbreaking. I don’t know what else to say. May God give you strength !

My prayers to you and your Mum !!

Denisejoy1 profile image
Denisejoy1

Sending you love and gentle thoughts xx

Willow_rob profile image
Willow_rob

I think I am nearing this time with my wife so I know how you are feeling. I take some comfort in knowing she is not distressed and I let the carers take the physical burden. Please do not be afraid to cry. I do, regularly, it is part of anticipatory grieving. My thoughts are with you. Rob

Unicorn2022 profile image
Unicorn2022

Thinking of you. I am dreading the day that we are given that news and I feel it may be sooner rather than later.

You sound as though you have done a wonderful job with mom. Bless you all πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•

Samila profile image
Samila

Be strong as your mum, lots of love to you.x

VonTripe profile image
VonTripe

words seem inadequate although i know that words of comfort are so important God Bless you sending so much love x

AnneandChris profile image
AnneandChris

Oh Lynda

sending you all love and prayers at this difficult time. Her battle is nearly over and she will be at peace.

Hugs

Anne

AJK2001 profile image
AJK2001

Thinking of you and wishing you strength to cope with the turmoil of emotions.

Love & hugs xxx

DE4EE profile image
DE4EE

I have yet to face this but I am sure I will do no better than you.

georgeg25 profile image
georgeg25

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. May God bless you all. I know what it is like. My Wife slipped away in that same peaceful way. πŸ’”πŸ™πŸ™πŸ’”

acorneater profile image
acorneater

I am glad you have supporting family around you,when my time comes,I have no one,best wishes Acorneater.

Pavaga profile image
Pavaga

Receive all my love. ❀️ Patty

Makua profile image
Makua

Lynda - embrace every minute with her. Tell stories with everyone in the room, make sure someone is always holding her hand. She can hear and feel all the energy in the room. Play here favorite music.

We did the exact same thing for my wife Gloria on her last day (Nov 24, 2018). The memory I will have on that day was every time I gave her a kiss, she would pucker up, so she knew I was there next to her. She took her last breath at 10:14pm.

This was the most amazing experience I have ever gone through, which I will hold near to my heart forever.

God Bless you and family.

racinlady profile image
racinlady

What a nice peaceful end you are experiencing with your mum. My heart goes out to you and your family.

Hugs, Pat

Marilyn_cbd12 profile image
Marilyn_cbd12

Oh, Linda, what a sad, bittersweet time for you all! I am grateful for the peace you and she know and hope that it continues....

Marilyn

Dickwin profile image
Dickwin

You are doing anything but rambling. You are talking through one of the most significant events of your life. God bless you and your mom and your family. Keep talking and writing and reminiscing with your family. And God speed to your mom

Warm regards

Dick

Nanny857 profile image
Nanny857

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Hoping your mum has a peaceful passing and you can be assured you did everything to keep her comfortable.

Lots of love, Nanny857xx

A big hug Linda.

It is exciting to read the contributions.

How much humanity of great quality.

I learn and reflect with my chat partners. Thank you for being there and I bless your presence and help.

A big and special hug for Linda and another for all the chat partners.

Luis

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