I hope everyone has had a nice Easter. I'm having trouble dealing today. I was leaving the nursing home, leaving Michael in the company of his cousin for the afternoon so that I could spend the time with our children and grandkids as they reminded me that I still have a family other than dad. When I told him I was going to our sons, he said "Am I going too?" It just broke my heart. I didn't want to leave him. It's not fair that I can go and he can't. Then he said he's going to get better so he can go home.
How do others process this in your own head? I just wanted to stay with him and not go. I feel devastated, helpless and hopeless. He was so hurt that I wasn't taking him with me. He is hoist transfer, can't stand, doubly incontinent, hallucinatory and sometimes aggressive. Although he was quite clear in the above statements, most times he can't be heard or understood. I'm just so very sad tonite. Can you relate?