CBD getting worse

Mum has carers come 4 times a day, however, once she has her bed call she is on her own (lives in sheltered housing). Mum needs to go the toilet twice a night and she has fell and hurt herself the last 3 nights. Ambulance and doctors have been to help and check her over. She will not use the commode in her room, or wear tenor ladies. As theses are the only things I can think she can use to stop her getting up during the night. I don't know what to do for her own safety. She won't listen to any of my suggestions. A very stressed daughter😞

13 Replies

  • Unfortunately it is the nature of the condition. She will probably keep getting up at night until she is no longer physically able to. You can't go against her wishes but the only way to stop her falling is to have someone there when she gets up.

    Sorry I can't suggest anything more positive but she will need 24 hour care eventually. I expect you realise that but it may be sooner rather than later.

    I hope someone here can think of a good solution but I never managed to keep my hubby in bed, even with me next to him.


  • Thanks for the response . Mum lives on her so unfortunately has no care at night 🙁 but I think she knows she going to need 24 hour care soon.

  • regarding falling in the toilet, i know the situation well, with my sister, what works with her is a length of rope i tied around the radiator which reaches the toilet, and the sink, having instructed her repeatedly to keep hold of the end and keep taunt at all times, she can manage with the other free hand, this really works with her,to keep her balance, obviously the position of the radiator is a big factor or maybe you could compromise with the rope some where else, some times the silly ideas work, my sister has psd

  • neat idea - now I'm really sorry we have forced hot air!

  • Thanks for response. Mum isn't strong enough to stand on her own so although great idea it might have been useful 12 months ago before she got worse.

  • when my mum fell and broke her hip a couple of years ago she was 'forced to be incontinent at night' when she first came out of hospital, she did not want to wear a pad but realised it was for her own safety, I cant think of any other solution for her if she is on her own at night

  • Manage to convince her today to wear pads tonight for her own safety. So fingers crossed she doesn't get up in the night.

  • Hi,

    I feel for your mum, being on her own at night, with her motor abilities and balance becoming worse. You do know that your mum won't be able to get out of bed at all eventually without help?

    Unfortunately, she is only going to keep falling.

    She should be made to realise that wearing pads would help her so much right now, even if her continence issues aren't as prominent at the moment as they will eventually get.

    I remember my husband,who also has CBD, was very difficult at times in the early years...understandably, trying to hold on to his failing Independence.

    Can I ask you how long your mum has been diagnosed?


  • It's time for a serious talk about 24 hour care.


  • Oh dear, what an awful situation. I so feel for suffers who don't have a partner to help. It does sound as if she needs a night nurse to help her, it must be so difficult to use a pad when you are aware that you need to go to the loo. I always try to think how I would feel and know how difficult I would find it. I also feel for you too as i guess you have other family commitments of your own. So difficult to spin all the plates at once. I hope the pads help and that you can get some care in place. Take care. Kate x

  • Hi your mum sounds in similar incontenance to my wife. My wife though cannot get up independently. The OT and District Nurses have suggested catheterisation to save me getting up 3 -5 times a night and give M proper sleep (read the replies to my post catheter or not). M has decided that she will have a catheter for a week to see what it is like I hope it will work and we will have fewer accidents. It may be worth checking with your mum's doctor if catheritisation may be beneficial.

    Best wishes Tim

  • Good luck, Tim. I hope your wife finds the catheter is a help for her, too.

  • We have a hospital bed, with sides up I doubt that she could get out.

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