Hi myself and my partner have just taken home fertility tests and they've both came out normal but have still not got pregnant,

[tjf7]

any suggestions?

[rmh2012]

Not sure how long you've been trying? If you've been trying long term, definitely speak to GP about a referral to specialists for additional tests.

If not long term - just relax!! Stress about falling pregnant can be a huge barrier to falling pregnant.

Good luck, and enjoy the journey.

R

[susikus]

The best time to conceive is 14 day before your next period is due - work this out if you can and abstain from intercourse for a week beforehand - that way you have lots of sperm that are mature enough to penetrate the egg - you need quality and quantity and it is a little known fact that the more frequently you have intercourse the less your chances of conception. Good luck.

[tjf7]

We've been trying since november last year. When I spoke to the gp she said worry about it if it hasn't happened after a year. I've following my cycle but will try no sex the week before.

Thanks x

[Carren]

Be careful with that 14 day advice. Although 14 days before your period is due is likely to be a fertile day for you, it may not be. The length of the luteal phase (the time between ovulation and the onset of menses) varies from woman to woman. Furthermore, you need to bear in mind that you need to have sex before you ovulate to conceive, as generally speaking once an egg is released it isn't viable for as long as it takes sperm to make their way as far as the fallopian tubes. For these reasons, the week you're planning to abstain is very likely a very important week for you to be having sex. While it is true that having sex too often can decrease sperm count, if everything's alright with your partner he shouldn't need anything like a week to recover. GPs and fertility specialists generally recommend that you have sex every other day, or three times a week, between periods. More often and your partner won't have enough time to produce the required number of sperm, less often and you risk missing your very short window. If you wish to time intercourse, perhaps because your or your partner's libido isn't up to thrice-weekly sex all month long, you can try fertility charting or ovulation predictor kits, but bear in mind that the latter can be expensive, and the former is by no means an exact science, so you still need to give yourself a pretty large margin of error to cover your bases. Also, for what it's worth, my GP strongly discouraged my husband and I from trying to time intercourse, because she had found that trying to do so tended to stress patients out, and stress is the enemy of conception.

I know from personal experience that it's very difficult advice to follow, but your best bet really is to just chill out, make love a lot, and not worry about it. You definitely haven't been trying long enough for the lack of conception so far to be a cause for concern. I can't remember the exact figures off the top of my head, but it takes the average couple with no fertility issues something like 7 months to conceive, and that's just average--normal is of course a pretty wide range of times either way. Good luck!

[tjf7 in reply to Carren]

Carren thank you so much for all that info that's gonna help a lot. It makes it difficult too as my partner works permanant night's so trying to fight it in is hard. Will definately try to chill out a bit tho xx

[Rowdy]

Try an ovulation kit( clear blue) We were trying for ages and got pregnant a couple of months after buying the monitor. I am forty and was starting to lose hope.

[tjf7]

Really? I think I will invest in one of those. Thanks.

[Rowdy]

Good luck xx

[bluebelle05]

dont think about it too much, stress can cause you not to get pregnant, just relax and have fun and let nature take its cause... good luck.

[Florence1]

I have been trying for years and I too bought the clear blue ovulation kit. We got pregnant in the first month of trying with the kit as it tells you when YOUR most fertile period is, which may not be the 14 day rule. It is such a simple yet clever piece of kit. A friend recommended it to me as she was in the same boat.

I also had three sessions of reflexology in the weeks running up to Christmas, when we fell pregnant, which helped me relax enormously. She didn't know I wanted to get pregnant but told me I had some blockages around my Fallopian tubes. Who knows? It may be coincidence or it may be that the combination of the two did the trick.

I also put my legs up against the wall after sex, which my partner thought was a load of old tosh, but you know what we only made love three times that cycle and hey presto, I am expecting a baby girl in five weeks time.

I wish you lots of luck and have my fingers crossed for you