hi ive a strange question my so called partner is in america at min but told me she is pregnant and showed me a clear blue test which

[idiot1]

said 3+. she'd only been there 3 weeks so can any1 tell me how can i work out the dates as she says shes bout 11weeks but not sure if the baby is mine also she hasnt seen a doc or anything so any advice would b grateful thanks

[bananarama]

The clear blue tests dont show any more than 3+. Think about when you had unprotected sex with her and then you could match up the dates. She does need to see a doctor though just to make sure every thing is ok. Have you spoken to her about your concerns? Even if you are 12weeks It will still show 3+. The only way to be sure it's yours is to find out when she's due so therefore the conception date and then the total proof would be to take a paternity test when the babies born. Hope this helps a little, good luck.

[idiot1 in reply to bananarama]

thank u very much but the imformation i have and she give me its due in feb 2013 but im still unsure again thank u very much

[rmh2012]

Hi,

The other thing to keep in mind is that number of weeks is calculated from the first day of her last period, rather than when you last had unprotected sex. So if 11 weeks seems a week or two before you had unprotected sex, that's probably the right timing.

But banarama is right, the official due date will let you work backwards, and a paternity test will provide the clincher. Once you find out the official due date (the due date is calculated at the ultrasound scan offered between 10-14 weeks), there are lots of pregnancy calculators online, so you should be able to work out the dates accurately. If she's currently in the US and is 11 weeks, I'm not sure whether that will impact when her first scan is done? (The dating is most accurate when the scan is done between 10-14 weeks.)

Best of luck!

R

[idiot1 in reply to rmh2012]

thank u very much but the imformation i have and she give me its due in feb 2013 but im still unsure again thank u very much

[bumpmd]

The only true test would be the paternity test. She isn't sure you are the father tells me that she was involved with someone else too. So, does it matter what the date of conception unless you had no relations with her anytime surrounding the possible dates? Unless she can say for sure you are the father...

[idiot1 in reply to bumpmd]

she insists from she found out that I am the father and still does its me that has the doubts bout it to me it doesn't add up that's why I've been trying to work it out as I don't wish to run after her for nothin again thank yous for your replys

[wooburm]

hello,firstly are you still with this partner?secondly has she ever given you reason to doubt her in the past?iv just worked out that if she is 12 weeks now in 28 weeks time that would give you a due date of 23rd of feb 2013,would that sound about right to you?clear blue do only go up to 3+weeks as i found that out myself and the due date is dated from the first day of her last period so if it is a week or so out timing wise it doesnt neccasarilly mean she has been unfaithful,trust this girl until you know for defenate as if the baby is yours and you have treated her as though she has been unfaithful than she will be more reluctant not to let you be part of the babys life where if you dont give her a reason to doubt you,you will have more success when the time comes,be there for her and if she does confess then so be it but at least you have done all you can do,take a deep breath count to ten and calm down,the out come is most likely you are the dad.

[idiot1 in reply to wooburm]

hi yes im ment to b still wit her and yes she has given me reason to doubt her in the past, my real problem is the test saying 3+ weeks as she was only there 3 weeks b4 she took test. So i dont know if the test mean that shes only 3weeks pregnant or she was more than 3weeks i do know her last proper period was bout 17th may and she told me she bled very lightly for bout 2/3 days in june bout 19th-21st, this is y im trying to work it out as she wont come back early agin thank yous very much for the help/advice.

[Niamh93]

if the test says 3+ that means that she is more than 3 weeks i took the same test and had a scan and i am now 7weeks so she could be 11weeks like she is saying the only way she would fine out is to go for a scan hope this helps.

[idiot1 in reply to Niamh93]

thank u it helps a bit i did check the clear blue site but im a bloke so did understand it all again thanks

[isaacsmom]

If her last period was 17th May, the baby would be born around 21st February 2013.

Depending on her cycle, you would have needed to have sex 10 -15 days after the date of her last period for her to have become pregnant, so between 27th May - 1st June 2012. It is common to have bleeding around a month after your last period even if you are pregnant as this is when the embryo attaches itself to the wall of the uterus. Some women mistake this for a period but it is not. Sounds like that is what your girlfriend experienced.

If you are any more than 3 weeks pregnant the clear blue tests will show 3+, so even if she is 12 weeks, they will show her as 3+.

Hope the dates match up for you and you are the daddy if that's what you want!

[idiot1 in reply to isaacsmom]

thank u for ur answer and yes i would love to b the daddy but its the way the dates r worked that gets me ive done it i'd say a dozen times each time i get bout 19th feb till4th march but i guess ill have to try and wait to find out again thank yous for the help

[isaacsmom]

There can be quite a lot of variation.. I have a 7 month old and my due date, when calculated from my last period was 5 days off when my baby was calculated to be due from the first scan... we were trying for a baby so I knew exactly when everything happened and it was still wrong... good luck!

[idiot1 in reply to isaacsmom]

Thank u very much for ur answer & ill need all the luck I can get

[MrsBailey]

The only true indication of when she will be due will come from having an ultrasound and even then it is important to remember it is a calculation. My husband and I are currently trying for a baby and I’ve been on the similar/same sites you mention and they can be just as confusing for us women haha. Like it has been said above Clearblue only says 3+ so she could very well be much further along than that.

Women’s cycles can be very confusing even to us and it’s our own body!! If your partner is a regular woman and has a standard 28-30 day cycle it would work something like this;

Period – 17th May

Ovulation approximately – 27th – 1st June

Resulting due date – Approx Feb 21st

Her next period would have been due around – 14th of June

As you said that she had light bleeding around the 19th – 21st this could be due to two things when pregnant; Implantation bleeding and/or breakout bleeding, both of which are completely normal.

All of the above is calculated off a 28 day cycle with a 5 day duration, so plus or minus the days you partner’s cycle would be.

Unfortunately until your partner has a scan and it is dated by a medical professional or the child is actually born and you can have a paternity test you will not know for sure.

Hope this helps break down the jargon a little!! Good luck : )

[idiot1 in reply to MrsBailey]

thank u it has helped a bit it was mainly the 3+ that got me as she was there 3weeks b4 taking the test so I assumed she was only 3 weeks pregnant which would mean it wasn't mine but thank u for your reply

[MrsBailey in reply to idiot1]

Oh completely ignore that....HCG the hormone that pregnancy tests test for is tested at certain micron levels and home pregnancy tests can only test to a certain sensitivity, hence the 3+. She could take one at 40 weeks and it would still say 3+, which is obviously confusing and very misleading for you. Plus I'd also like to point out that if she had only been out ther for 3 weeks before taking the test that it is very unlikely given her last period date that she would have had time to ovulate, concieve and a test to come back positive. I'd disregard the test and listen to your partner : )

[idiot1 in reply to MrsBailey]

thanks for ur reply but I'm still not to sure as she now tells me she's starting to crave thing's and according to the web sites I've been on that's an early sign of pregnancy so I give trying to work it out thank yous again

[MrsBailey]

Eeerm no!! My sister craved oranges throughout her pregnancy, my mom mint with all 3 of hers....Everyone that I've spoken to has had them at different stages. My friend is currently 13 weeks pregnant with twins and she's craving blue freezepops haha. It's important to remeber that every pregnancy is different and different things will happen at different times for different people.

[idiot1 in reply to MrsBailey]

Ok thank u very much for all the help ill try and wait till she arrives back and gets to a doctor again thank u

[MrsBailey]

Probably best!! Good luck

[idiot1]

ok remember im a bloke now after my last question which i was very grateful for all replys ive another question she has just told me she is exhausted and unconfortable and her stomach is tight but after some checking on the net thats not ment to happen till at least 20 weeks so anyone have any ideas what it maybe thanks

[kipper]

Exhaustion is very very typical in early months - I was falling asleep on the couch before I even tested pregnant with my first child. Also, her whole body is changing so it's perfectly reasonable to be uncomfortable right from early days (things get swollen and ligaments get loose so the body easily feels very sore). And by now, although she may not necessarily look pregnant to a stranger, those who know her would probably notice her body shape change - so absolutely her stomach would feel tight (or at least her clothes around her stomach - if she's even still able to wear her old clothes).

I think you might need that deep breath, count to ten again.

And also, maybe stop reading and just talk/listen to her. It's bad enough now during pregnancy, but if you try to read and believe everything you can find about being a parent, you will go potty! Believe me, I stressed so much about doing the 'right thing' for our first but ended up spending more time with my head in book confused than I was playing with him or getting out for a walk etc. It really does your head in the amount of information out there.

Just like every pregnancy, every baby is different and neither the woman's hormones nor the baby have ever gotten around to reading the manuals!