Post baby body

[TWBK]

Hi, I have some questions and curious about how do you guys think.

After gave birth, I felt overwhelmed with what’s happening on my body, not just the changes of the shapes but also the bleeding…. However, the postnatal courses are mostly baby-focus. How did you guys do you find help to cope with the issue? For me, I talked to midwife, called friends, and searched information online.

How do feel about talking this issue with other mums? I feel there isn’t much discussion around post-baby body.

Also, how do you manage self-care? It’s really difficult for me because it’s really time consuming with my little one. How can I make a realistic self-care plan? I can know how is your form of self-care like?

Thank you.

[Seb9]

I really didn't worry or think about my body that much after I had my baby, I knew I'd bleed for several weeks, and that I'd be sore. I was lucky I didn't have to bad a tear or any stitches so I mainly just bathed in some Epsom salts and moved about a bit more carefully for the first few days. I was surprised that after a few weeks I don't even really remember that pain or how my body felt. I think sleep depravation and hormones do a lot to block it out, so much so I want to try for another one soon.

I think I'd spoken to a lot of friends with kids and heard lots of horror stories so mine seemed reasonable and I felt I got through OK.

Self care after baby first arrived meant making sure I had enough chocolate biscuits in the house and having a shower. Other than that it seemed that she was either attached to me or crying. I definitely found the new born days tough.

In terms of self care now, my husband does a lot for us, he's in charge of bath time and nappy changing when he's home. I love to cook, so while he does bath time I will cook dinner, I'm doing a Zumba class on a Monday on Zoom so those nights he does bath time and dinner.

Baby is now 9 months old and plays independently for a while, eats food and isn't so dependent on my milk so there's more time for me as dad or my mum (who lives with us) can take her for a while. I've started eating more healthy and doing some exercise.

I was able to get out for dinner and drinks with my friends before lock down and now about once a week we still catch up with a glass of wine on Zoom, which is great adult time, while husband plays with the baby and only brings her to me for a feed to get her to sleep.

I think I'm lucky that my husband is so hands on and helpful it would be hard to find time for me if I was on my own.

[GemX81]

I have a 5 year old and a 13 month old and my body is definitely not the same as it was before children. I've put on a little weight but not much, I'm a size 10-12 so not a big person, however, I find everything is a little more wobbly than it was before children. But I accept my body for what it is. And it's made 2 little miracles. I had both of mine by csection so the recovery was tough especially with my first. I mainly spoke to my mum about it but I agree alot of what is spoken about is baby focused. After my second baby I really struggled with anxiety and would constantly worry about both my kids. I got some CBT and that really helped to normalise those feelings and worries. It also taught me the importance of self care. I went back to work when my second was 5 months and even though my husband is a stay at home dad I struggled to balance work life, the needs of my husband and children and my own needs. And I still have moments when it all gets too much but you have to take time out for yourself because otherwise you can't be the partner and mother you need or want to be. And I think this gets easier as your children get older. As they become more independent it's easier for you to find that time.

[Winter_Girl]

In terms of my body I didn't worry about how it would change, in fact I was looking forward to seeing it change. I was even looking forward to gaining more curves, but I went the opposite way - I lost my curves! I gained nearly 2 stone in pregnancy but seemed to lose weight everywhere else and now I'm lighter than I was before pregnancy. I would happily put on a few pounds if it meant getting my bum back! For me, the bleeding and soreness lasted for 3 weeks and I never found it to be that bad, so I guess I was lucky. My stitches would feel uncomfortable if I walked or sat for too long. My tummy is quite flat but it is wobbly, but I really don't mind because I don't do any exercises to change it so I can't really complain! I'm really proud of my body and probably like it more than I ever have because of what it has done for me.

What I found hard, and still do 16 month on, is self care. For months I lived off bananas, whole nuts and lots of sweets, cake and biscuits until my partner came home from work and cooked because I never seemed to have time to do anything other than take care of my baby! Even as she has gotten older and more independent, I still struggle to keep on top of everything and look after myself properly and have been quite down at times for not being able to do it all! I'm not a control freak, nor am I terribly house proud (I'm not a slob either), but it can make me feel quite inadequate that I can't keep on top of simple things! I do make time in my day to do a little bit of cleaning now, even if it is just the basics like cleaning the toilet and running the vacuum round. More importantly, since lockdown, every other night I do yoga after I put my daughter to bed, which had been great. Sometimes I only do 15 minutes but it is enough to make me feel good. Often I do another 10 minutes if I feel up to it. There are evenings when I really can't be bothered but I make myself and I'm glad when i have. The great thing is i just do it in my PJs! I don't get sweaty as I do the beginners, but I can definitely feel it! I also eat much better these days and my daughter obviously eats 3 meals a day now, so I prepare myself something at the same time.

Self care is so important, but I agree it is not talked about enough. I really want to start working in postnatal care for this very reason. Xx

[caballito0123]

Take some iron pills to replenish everything you lose through bleeding. Rest for 40 days. No heavy labor around the house. After 40 days start walking..females look better after labor. We love them more. Rest,rest then start a light exercise routing down the road