Update :-/

[Starlight_ftm]

Thought id come back to this app and write an update. My little girl is 6 weeks tomorrow. It’s gone quick. She’s mainly content but has had a few crying times that keep me awake but nothing abnormal. Fortunately I fell in love with her easily, I had moments of “please stay asleep” through those exhausted moments but again, I think that’s normal.

Reason for update is because I had a review with my psychologist yesterday and I’m feeling so stupid after it. She is really lovely and when i returned for review I openly spoke about how my ocd and ptsd symptoms had really increased, that I was keen to work on them especially the ocd because when I could be sleeping, I’m acting out those compulsions so adds to exhaustion. I’m never normally open about ocd and hide it in shame so I was proud of self for disclosing.

At the end of the review she asked if I was still visiting America to see other half in September once we married and i said that was the plan. She said she didn’t have any regular slots until September. I did cry. Everytime I get close to dealing with symptoms, something gets pushed out of my reach. She said she wouldn’t want to open up anything with limited time even if she did have slots now incase i go to america in September. She felt bad that I thought our apt’s would continue and she said other things but i started to shut down. She is going to talk to psychology team and call me next week about possible solution.

She seems like she actually cares but she may not be able to help due to constraints she has. I just feel guilty for shutting down so much and being upset. I had to share on here because i didn’t know what to do. Thank you if you read all this lol xx

[Sisi14]

Hey lovely, well I’m happy to hear your little bundle of joy is doing well and coming along and all is going well with her.

I am sorry that you finally opened up regarding your ocd and wanting to allow people in and now you feel you have took 5 step forwards and 10 backwards, you should be proud of yourself for talking about it as you say it’s easy to shut down like you did after she said she had no September slots, hopefully it will be early October or you can feel comfortable with someone else.

You should be proud of yourself as you have also expressed yourself on here .

I hope it gets resolved soon so you know when your next appointment is.

Xxx

[Major2116]

Congratulations on your baby girl! Glad she is doing well!

You should be so proud of yourself! I know how hard it is to open up and thinking that you sound stupid.

My anxiety has taken over. Our little boy is 17 weeks old now and he's nearly rolling from back to front which he's not meant to do until he's 6 months! He should be able to roll from stomach to back but he doesn't, he's quite advanced and a strong boy. I can't sleep at night through anxiety and petrified in case he rolls over and can't roll back (even though we have an angelcare mat).

I also convince myself of stupid things and my thoughts escalate into the worst scenario. I've realised I need some help but I feel so stupid about talking about it because to me it's so real but to others it's daft. I'm having CBT now and medication so hopefully I'll be back on track soon!

Try to keep positive! You're doing the right thing hun. It's just a slight set back but you'll get there! Xx