Thought I had seen the end of the maternity assessment unit but...

[ashy2005]

My little man is now 10 days old and is great.. tiny bit of wind and a few reflux problems which caused him to loose weight his first two weigh ins but at his third yestreday he was an ounce over his birth weight so i was a happy mummy once again

Me on the other hand.. a different story!! from 36 weeks my blood pressure was high, was monitored by midwife every 2 days and continuously sent to MAU for monitoring however after i had my son i assumed it would return to normal but every app i have had since it has been high.. so refered back to MAU yesterday.. sitting yet again for 5 hours as i wasnt an emergency as im not pregnant so anyone who is pregnant with problems was seen first (although i didnt mind because they are priority) the waiting didnt help my blood pressure!! Then when i was finally seen it was so high the midwife said 'love if you dont sit back and relax they will admit you!' so you can guess what happened after.. sky high again

After an hour and a half it was back to normal.. and the doctor agreed to let me go. Sitting doing nothing im fine but the minute i do anything it shoots up.. I cant live my life sitting down, I have 2 kids Today i had my partners family over.. they where barely in the door and i started to feel faint and clumsy.. like i was slightly tipsy i could barely talk and kept avoiding starting conversations.. it really scared me. its ok as my partner is off work but hes back on tuesday and I couldnt feel like that with a little baby and a 7 year old to look after. I get headaches every day, feel faint, blood loss is light and still get the odd after pain..

I guess im just annoyed at myself.. after my miscarriages i spent the first 5 months of this pregnancy worried about every little ache or pain.. then the second half worried something was wrong with him or he was in distress.. then i started worrying about the labour and everything that can go wrong and now im worrying about him.. is he too hot? hungry? happy? its my fault i have high blood pressure and now I cant even enjoy his first few weeks as all that damage i have brought on myself is staying with me and i feel awful for it

Opps sorry for going on.. guess i needed to get it all off my chest

Still love reading all your stories and hope everyone is well and enjoying the summer xx

[dinkydoona]

Ahh hon, firstly congratulations on the safe arrival of your lovely little boy!! It is natural for you to have been worrying throughout your pregnancy especially since you have previously suffered miscarriages. It is also completely natural for you to still be worrying now that your baby is here Obviously there is no magic wand to stop your worrying and negative thoughts but you just need to try and relax and focus on giving your little one all the cuddles and kisses he needs. Eventually your negative thoughts will just get less and less although being a mother already yourself you know that we never really stop worrying!! Give yourself some time and don't be too hard on yourself because everything you are feeling is completely normal, take care xx

[Megzey]

Is there not any family close by than can help you for a few weeks with stuff, even if it is looking after the baby while you have a bath or a sleep?

I refused all help with my 2nd and made myself ill and I wish I hadn't been so pig minded to refuse the help and pretend I could cope with being a mum of 2 with zero sleep.

YOU are the main priority as if you are running on no fuel then it doesn't work. The school holidays are fast approaching and you dont want to get stressed out. Sorry to be blunt but just dont want you to make yourself ill and it go unnoticed.

[Hidden]

Yes U really do need to take it easy. ..that is not good and u have to make sure ur in tip top condition so ur on for ur kids. ..I hope they are monitoring u.. did they say why it's happening? If U feel funny u should go to a&e and get seen that way thru may treat u differently. . Hope It gets sorted soon xx

[ashy2005]

Thanks for all your comments I dont give myself a break, i do take over as this is my partners first baby and i have done it all before and im used to being a single parent and doing things on my own.. iv been told by my midwife and health visitor to take a step back and let my partner do things for me.. I do have a lot of support from family but wouldnt leave him with them just yet as hes so young..

seen the health visitor today and she said its anxiety, worry and stress.. also because of my history and mood at the minute i could be more prone to getting the baby blues so shes going to keep a close eye on me. I do have good days and bad but its because im not feeling 100% i have an app on tuesday so i really hope they can advise me and actually figure out whats happening xxx