Just been on the weightwatchers website and it asked me if I accept cookies.
Is that a trick question? 🤔.
.
I walked down a street where the houses were numbered 64K, 128K, 256K, 512K and 1MB.
Is that was a trip down memory lane.
.
.
I wonder what
electric eels were called before electricity was invented?.
.
.I rang my mate Stan this morning and his wife answered:
"I wanted to wish you and Stan a good holiday," I said. "You fly from Gatwick tomorrow, don't you?"
She said, "Stansted."
"Blimey," I said, "he seemed absolutely fine in the pub last night."
.
.
ZEN TEACHINGS
Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead
of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path
is narrow. In fact, just sod off and leave me alone.
.
Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try
missing a couple of mortgage payments.
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in
their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile
away and you have their shoes.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how
to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
If you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it
was probably well worth it.
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
Good judgment comes from bad experience ... and most of
that comes from bad judgment.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
There are two excellent theories for arguing with women.
Neither one works.
Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips
are moving.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
.
.Marks and Spencer's new advert says it wouldnt be Christmas without M&S... No it would be Chrita 😊
The World is Closed - A topical poem - update and edit!