It is only now I realise I have mental health issues concerning depression, anxiety and OCD
It is only when she has insight to know she is being negative that she can change and to know what is causing her negativity and in turn the contents of her conversations will be more interesting
Unfortunately there are a lot of people who project their negativity without even realising 😔 They can drain the life blood like vampires and make you feel so down and depressed. However, and this is quite a task, try finding something positive to say, about her negative. (This can take some time) I used to have a neighbour like this, who was only interested in telling me how awful her life is, and discussing other neighbours in a negative light. Turn the tables on her misery, and tell her she looks nice today, her hair is lovely, you love her coat, shoes, jacket etc etc etc. But, if you find this not to work, you will need to cut this person out of your life! You deserve to be happy and well, and this won't happen if you have misery walking beside you every day! It is a difficult situation, and sometimes people just need to be told straight! I wish you well..... love and blessings to you and yours my friend!💕💕🙏🏽
I have a lifelong friend like this too, who became much worse after her husband died a few years ago .
Fortunately, she lives a couple of hours drive away .. so we don't see each other often .
When we talk by phone she talks badly of everyone we know, including her two lovely daughters .
I cannot get her to stop no matter what I try .... my only way of dealing with it is to continually say the opposite to her opinions of everyone ..
like Oh No ! I think she's a lovely woman !!
That seems to make her see her negativity and be embarrassed by it ... and therefore she starts to soften up a little .. and grudgingly agrees with me .
I've known her most of our lives and she won't/can't change.
Privately I know she likely has mental health issues .. but all my coaxing and her family's... goes nowhere .
They merely result in screaming
outbursts .
Just show your kindness .. maybe you've got some daffodils or snowdrops in your garden you could give her on your way
I know exactly how you feel. But unfortunately I also realise what it must be like for your neighbour. I have been having a really rough time lately and because of how I feel I have become very with drawn. It is difficult to motivate myself to reach out and talk to anyone, when I feel so ill and know they couldn't possibly understand, and I am sufficiently aware that folk have their own problems without having to listen to mine. That is why I tend to offload on here, and why I am so appreciative of the listening, support and encouragement I have received from 'friends' who are going through similar situations and have empathy. It has given me the 'push' I needed to keep going and to count my blessings instead feeling negative about almost everything. Especially now, I think we all need a bit of hope. I agree, if she really doesn't want your encouragement, you need to give her a wide berth, we all need as many positives in our lives at the moment as we can get! Take care. x
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