I had my beloved black Labrador, Paddy put to sleep yesterday afternoon the grief is beyond monumental at the moment. I normally take 4.5 Prednisolone but with the immense stress of the day before yesterday and yesterdays ordeal I have been taking an extra 5mg making it 9.5mg for the last two days. My question is how long is this viable as I don’t want to get hooked back to this amount but I feel dreadful beyond words. To say I’ll feel better in a couple of days is ambiguous . My adrenal function is poor only supported with the 4.5mg of Pred. Any advice on this situation please?
The sickness rules applied to bereavement. - PMRGCAuk
The sickness rules applied to bereavement.
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Suffolklady
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Hi Suffolklady 😊
I’ll leave it to someone more expert than me to advise on the pred but I just wanted to say I’m so sorry to hear about your lovely Paddy. That’s a beautiful pic you put up, you must miss him dreadfully. Take care of yourself, I hope you feel better before too long.
Hugs 🤗🤗xx
I am so sorry for the loss of Paddy. He looks like he had a very happy life, how brave of you to put him out of his misery. What a lucky dog!
There is no real escape from loss and grief, I have found in my own experience, it has to be faced, somehow. At least you can be assured that your last act of love was the right thing to do.
Your extra 5 mgs shouldn’t be extended beyond 10 days at the most, like people who have to take it short term. The pain of grief can be so physical. You do right to head off a full blown flare. Sending you a warm hug, this pain will pass. Xx
Aw so sorry about your dog!! Hope you feel better asap. It will take time, the experts will be along im sure soon! I would imagine a few days to help you over the shock of it all maybe. Take care.
The loss of a pet is really traumatic, I really feel for you. I still miss my Golden Retriever who died ten years ago and the mongrel called Muffin I had as a child. Plus a lot of other cats and dogs inbetween. We still have our happy memories though. I should reduce your pred dose again within the next week though.
Thank you Piglette I will do it very soon I don’t want to be dependant again. I’ve been laying on the floor with him for several days so lots of strange pains anyway.
PMRproAmbassador
Comes under the same rules as a flare at that level - you are fine for up to 10 to 14 days to drop back quickly. Mind you - if you have next to no adrenal function, there isn't any to lose again is there?
So sorry - hugs.
That is true Pro think on a blood only cortisol no Pred test I have the level of 15 when it should be approximately 300 + so not good.
What dose of pred were you on when that was checked?
I have been on 4.5 mg for about 14 months now
Are you under the care of an endocrinologist? Have they issued you with an emergency kit? Have you got emergency details on your phone?
Yes I am under a endocrine team and have got direct access to a Endo nurse practitioner. She’s been sorting out my Grave disease to with 6 weekly checks. They are stable however I do feel unwell most of the time I can’t explain but like I have flu, weak and tired, strange tingling in my limbs, flushes. Pain is an issue but I’ve been a cracking door for years. Everything checks out okay on paper but internally I feel a wreck, not just because of Paddy, my life’s on hold I don’t embrace life anymore.
Yes got an emergency pack and also a bracelet
Sounds as if you need more pred - might well help
Yes she did say try 5mg I’m debating about that now.
It is all about quality of life and it sounds as if you don't have any. Adrenal insufficiency is hard going - make things the best you can. Your body is only subject to the pred you are taking, there is no contribution from the adrenals, so not much likelihood of excess. If 6 or even 7 gives you your life back I'd say that was fine. It's what I;ll be on I think, 6 didn't work and it wasn't nice!
Thank you you are right I believed that 4.5mg should be the equivalent dose to the really thing. We are all different I know I needed to support on my terrible couple of days that’s why I upped it. I can’t see it waking after 6/7 years.
You never know - there are people who have got off pred after more than 10 years, I know of 11 and 13 year stories. But it depends on the person - for some adrenal problems start around 10mg and the quoted equivalent for years was 7.5mg. A study at Imperial London claims 2 to 3 mg is enough to function - again, not for everyone and I suspect it depends on various factors.
I know your pain. Lost our lovely boy Freddie 18 months ago - we miss and love him still. Taking him to be put to sleep was so so hard but we knew we had to. I try to remember how lucky we were to have him for 10 years and what a good life he had with us. Such a lovely boy - yes grief is flip side of love but so glad he was ours. Its early days - your boy was obviously much loved too. Could cry with you. Sending hugs. X
It’s the pain of losing the routine and the everyday living. Never eating a whole biscuit, falling over him when he creeps up although he was human size coming upstairs to lay beside me in bed forming the day around him. He was with as 24/7 except for sleeping in the kitchen at night so his life was totally with us. I know he very lucky he’s not hurting now but we certainly are.
Hi,
Feel really sorry for you, as I know from experience exactly how you feel.
We too have a black lab (Lizzie) and I am completely in love with her! She is a sprightly eleven years old now,
It does get better as days go by, but horrible for you for now.
Paddy ( yes, that’s my name too!).
He was born in Southern Ireland shipped over for breeding luckily he was sold to a breeder we had our last one from out the back of a van at a dog show. That’s the origin of Paddy’s name he was Irish! When we lost the last one I rang very distort and fate bought us together at 10moths old. He was the sweetest gentle most obedient loyal quiet lab we ever had, he was one in a million. His first 10 months were I think not the best unfortunately but we made up for it in the time we had together.
Thank you. Brings tears to my eyes!
Hi Suffolk lady, there are a couple of us here in the same situation as you. I lost my Border Colie a few weeks ago and although I do accept she has gone from this life I still talk to her every morning when out and know that she is still there looking after me. She was a part of my life, and next to my OH, my best friend. I will always miss her. Huge hugs and a couple of weeks max is OK on your new dose.
Thank you for your kind words. I totally agree with you I have to have that mind set too. Sitting on the loo was never a private moment with Paddy around and last night I found I was stroking where his head would have been. It’s a comfort to know I’m not alone and I do know I’m not it’s just wherever you go people are out with dogs 😞
Dear Suff, I so, so understand. When our little mutt Barney suddenly died seven years ago, our hearts broke. He has a little shrine with his ashes in the den. Your Paddy had a sweet life with you and you did right by him all along and at the end.
If you don’t get a big flare, maybe 5 more mgs isn’t necessary.
After adopting my late son’s two dogs a few months ago, I now have three total — three potential bathroom buddies expecting to be scratched. 🌝
Thank you for those kind words.
My sister lost her beloved dog a few days ago, she is devestated. She has him buried in the garden with a lovely plaque and beautiful words on it. She lives alone, he was everything to her….Hugs …..
That’s especially difficult being alone at least I have my husband. So sorry for her. Paddy is being cremated I will get his ashes back in a casket in a couple of weeks. He needs to come home.
Yes, she has comfort he is in his garden that he loved. She has said no more animals, can’t go through it again..
That’s understandable but I found getting an animal straight away bought down the grief immediately. This will be our last as my hubbie is 78 today actually today, and doesn’t want to have another one. He didn’t want Paddy but after 2 years of hell for me without a dog he relented. Paddy latched onto him and they were inseparable.
And there are also elderly dogs who need a home - elderly people fit quite well! I have one friend who swore no more because they would be likely to outlive her - 9 years later she is still going strong at 90 ...
Yes that’s true I would absolutely, unfortunately I can’t walk very well my husband is fit for his age walked Paddy three times a day had a social animal network but the pain it causes is beyond measurable and older dogs will live shorter lives I need one that’s got a long life ahead otherwise I’m going to be distressed like this again too soon I get where you are coming from.
You can often find someone to help do the walking - there are many people who would love a dog but for various reasons can't have one - be it their financial situation, the rules where they live or strange hours of work, Sharing one is a gift to them too.
Yes, thank you for your positive vibes Pro we live in an area with dog walking services
For money you mean? There are also people who just do it for the love of a dog ...
Regarding walking a dog when you are unable to when you are older - there is a charity called The Cinnamon Trust who put volunteers who like walking in touch with more elderly people who find themselves for whatever reason unable to walk them any more and are in danger of having to give them up. They also help with cat feeding etc too. I know because I volunteer with them and walk a local dog once a week. It's all free as is a charity. They can also help with after care in the event of an owner's move to care home/ death if you register. Such a brilliant charity helping to fill a very large gap in our society!x
Nice one PMRpro. I was 80, when we took on Lizzie. She was 8, and belonged to an elderly friend, who couldn’t look after her anymore. It was just before lockdown, and one of the best decisions we ever made.
Paddy
We put our dogs collar around an acer tree with his ashes. Feel for you so much. Truly awful. X
Let Me Go
When I come to the end of the road And the sun has set for me
I want no rites in a gloom filled room Why cry for a soul set free?
Miss me a little, but not for long And not with your head bowed low Remember the love that once we shared
Miss me, but let me go.
For this is a journey we all must take And each must go alone.
It's all part of the master plan
A step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick at heart Go to the friends we know. Laugh at all the things we used to do Miss me, but let me go.
by Christina Rossetti
Beautiful Piglette
Sat here sobbing. We had to have our cat, Minnie, put to sleep last year. We miss her terribly still. I talk to her every day. What a beautiful poem, Thank you.
Love that one. Thank you for posting.
Beautiful!! Big lump In throat here!!
Thank you all for your advice and kind words
Dear Suffolklady, so sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved Paddy 💔 l’m sure you must be heartbroken.
Take Care
MrsN
❤️💔🌺
I can't advise you about your medication but just wanted to say how very sorry I am to hear of your loss I know the pain only too well and what you are going through
There are no words that will help at the moment but I hope knowing people understand and care as is obvious by how many replies you have had will maybe just give you a little bit of comfort
Take care
Yes it does thank you so much. I’m lost at the moment. Xxx
I know and I'm so sad for you Our son had the most beautiful black cocker spaniel Bob As he and his wife are both police officers we said before they got a dog that we would always help out Well we loved him as if he was ours and we had wonderful times we took him out most weeks and had him to stay even taking him on holiday a few times they were such precious times
When he passed away I was totally bereft and he wasn't even our dog
I got in touch with Blue Cross Pet Bereavement and they were wonderful and really got me through and gave me coping strategies I can really recommend them and were there for me
My heart goes out to you as losing a pet is just awful
Thinking of you x
Thank you with experience I’ve had with my past two black pups I know my grieving isn’t a short process and it was two years and Paddy that relieved it from the loss of my previous lab. It’s a good thought you put out there thank you. I’m sure as everyone who is a dog lover knows it’s one of the hardest things we go through. Steph x
I have only ever had cats but have been heartbroken when I lost each one over the years When Bob passed away I was so shocked at just how hard it hit me as he wasn't ours so I can understand what you are going through It is one of the hardest things I have ever been through definitely
I'm so sorry xx
I'm so sorry to hear about your dog - I was in the same situation back in August last year when I had my ginger/white cat Ginge put to sleep. I know exactly how you feel, the grief is all consuming and the guilt too even if you know you've done the only kind and right thing, it doesn't make it any better does it! Time is the only thing and even now some days the grief whells up again - I think our general depressed and weary state doesn't help at all. I didn't increase my Pred but that's just me, please listen to those on here who are far more knowledgeable! I hope you are feeling a bit better about it all soon but time is the thing.x
Thank you Pusph it is only less than two days but with a broken routine and the memories that were built and never to be built on again I knew it would be hard. The lose of my last dog was before I was in the condition I am in now, no Pred never heard of PMR and much less pain only 50 at the time so not such an old crock now it’s different and was having problems with the adrenal so with a low dose so I knew I needed to support my system. The advice I have is invaluable I’ll see the weekend out and try my reduced dose. I needed a boast of Pred to make me more mobile to be on the floor with Paddy I surprised myself how I did it but glad I did. X
Totally understand. All my other pet losses were well before I had this 'common' illness that no one has ever heard of until they get it! And this last trauma at the loss of my Ginge I have taken so extra hard because of the PMR/steroids/adrenals/low mood etc I think. I imagine it is the same for you. Just remember you gave him a lovely, loved and safe life and a gentle passing - not something that all animals have, unfortunately! Thinking of you.x
Yes that’s very true not being well exacerbates the whole thing and wrecks the body with the crying thing I fell muscles are aching all over. That’s why I needed a bit of extra prednisolone support there’s only so much a body can stand. I know we gave him the best life but it’s difficult even so. Thank you X
What a gorgeous doggy. I’m so sorry you are parted from him. Be kind to yourself. Thinking of you. X
Thank you so much x
what a beautiful dog, and a beautiful photo. Of course you will be devastated, it’s a family member, you loved very much. We lost our dog last June and couldn’t stop crying. My husband is 88 and I am 76, and I’m sure our dogs have kept us both going. We got a puppy in August, and hard work though it is , she has brought such joy, and eased the pain. Because of our age we have an agreement with our daughter that she will have Tilly when we go. I compiled a big photo book of my Holli with lots of happy memories in. I hope your pain will ease soon, just remember you gave your dog a wonderful life. Take care!
Thank you so much. Yes he was our life we are with him every hour practically he was our entertainment the thing that got me out as we don’t do an awful lot but just a sit in the car and a sandwich with a bag of chips and Paddy with his head through the middle of us and a short walk for me gave as much a joy to me as going on a holiday or going to a show is to other people. I’m glad you are enjoying your new dog have fun x
what lovely memories, sending a big hug you take care
Feel for you. My beautiful and feisty terrier went two years ago. Her pic is my logo. She is my phone front page and when I moved her ashes came with me. She now supports the most beautiful whie rambling rose. We'll love them forever ❤️
Sorry to hear you are still suffering I want his ashes home with us that will give me a better frame of mind I called at the vets yesterday to chose a different casket and he was still there not picked up yet it upset me to think he has to travel to Cambridge to be cremated. But it is what it is. X
Not sure still suffering, just wanted to say she will always be a part of my life's memories and I do enjoy the white rose. Xx
I can't give medical advice, but really sympathise with your grief. Your dog was lovely and you will treasure the memories. When our standard Yorkshire terrier died my husband and I both wept, the pain was immense, she was so much a part of our lives. I am sorry that you are going through this.
I am so very sorry for your loss and completely understand your pain at the loss of dear Paddy. On 10 December last year our almost 2 year old GSD Milo had an awful accident here at home. He tried to jump over the baby gate to my husband and just didn’t make it, he died in my hubby’s arms, he had broken his neck we think, he died instantly.
Over the next couple of days I suffered a massive flare, I have been off prednisolone for 2.5 years, I do have RA and take MTX and Sulfazalazine . I spoke to my consultants secretary and she got me an appointment the next day, she was so good to have acted so quickly. They agreed the flare was as a result of the loss of Milo and gave me a steriod injection. Which thankfully worked for me. Milo’s breeder was so supportive as I totally blamed myself for the loss of Milo, it was my job to look after him. She told me it was an accident and not to blame myself. We now have a new puppy Jack from Milo’s breeder. I think constantly of Milo. Please look after yourself and give yourself time to grieve for Paddy, you gave him a wonderful life xx
That is terribly sad heartbreaking. That would finish me off what you went through. X
I really don’t think we will ever come to terms with it to be honest, but Puppy Jack is a delight and keeping us on our toes, he is a godsend bless him. Xx
Im so sorry to hear this i had to do the same for our 15 year old Black lab, they become a big part of the family . you are entitled to feel sad. not sure about upping your steroids though xx🌷
What a lucky dog to have had you and you to have had him. I am so sorry to hear about Paddy. Having been through similar experiences, please take care of yourself first and remember the good times. Sending virtual hugs.
so so sorry to hear about Paddy. He will be having fun running in the cloud with all his new found friends. No how it feels. Take care 😊
So sorry for your loss. Our pets are our family and so leave a pet sized hole in our hearts. Allow yourself to grieve for Paddy. One day you will just remember the good times you had together. Cherish those memories xxx
so sorry for your loss of dear Paddy 💕
So sorry Suffolklady. It's often said that our pets are like one of the family, but to me they are our family. This poem was sent to us when we had our lovely Ash put to sleep. It made me cry and still does now, but it also made me feel better. I keep it along with his ashes, his collar and a little bit of his fur from his blanket. I hope that it helps you.
If it should be I grow frail and weak
And pain should wake me from my sleep
Then you must do what must be done
For this last battle can't be won.
You will be sad, I understand
Don't let your grief then stay your hand
For this day more than all the rest
Your love and friendship stand the test.
We've had so many happy years
What is to come will hold no fears
You'll not want me to suffer, so
When the time comes, please let me go.
I know in time you too will see
It is kindness you do to me
Although my tail its last has waved
From pain and suffering I've been saved.
Do not grieve that it should be you
Who has to decide this thing to do
We've been so close, we two, these years
Don't let your heart hold any tears.
I am so sorry for your loss I know what it is like, I always take in rescue dogs, some have lived to over 16 some 2yrs. At the moment I have Maggiemae 12yrs had her since she was 18 months old severely abused, she is a lovely German Shepherd and shows so much love and trust, and Winston who is now 15yrs a Border Terrier the owners said they want him to be put down because he is old. My vet rang me up and asked if I would take him on, so I have taken him on. I have a lot of things wrong with me, but just about manage to give them walks albeit with my two walking sticks, but they know the routine and once off the lead they run around together. Whenever I have had to put any of my doggie family down or they have died of old age I have said I never want to go through the distress and heartache and taking more tablets to help me get through the day. No more dogs, but Winston is now my 7th rescue dog, I never ever forget any of my dogs and sometimes get the names mixed up, although you will not want to hear this but the best thing to help you is to get another dog, no dog is the same and they all have their own characteristics but whilst you are loving a dog that needs your love it will help to heal the loss of your dear black lab. I know the thought of another dog is not what you want to hear and you are not replacing your beloved one, you are helping another dog to have love and kindness given to it, and your beloved black lab is on the rainbow bridge encouraging you to take in another lost soul.
Thank you Didgeydo. It’s lovely you can have those dogs but how you emotionally cope when they go don’t know. I have had three dogs in my life from the age of 21 I’ve always had a black lab the first Benson was 14 his passing was totally unbearable within a few days we were looking to get another and we chose a 8 week old black pup we also Benson. He passed at 13 1/2 again I cried for weeks, months as my husband didn’t want another one but two years on whilst he got over it I hadn’t he gave in and we found Paddy at 10 months old. My husband is 78 and says that he’s getting too old and although I’m younger he has always walked Paddy as I can’t. He relented the last time and gave me my wish it’s unfair to do it again. He misses him like crazy as Paddy’s idolised him and became his dog. Paddy was a very special boy with a soft quiet non destructive sensitive and oh so obedient nature. He suited our life style would never wander off a true joy to have (the last two total nightmares off lead no pleasure to walk them but Paddy was so good and stress less. Never trained him he was just like that. He had a bad 10 months freighted over from Ireland in a tiny cage sold to another breeder at a dog show up north. He lived with 10 other breeder dogs who would most probably ‘hassled’ him and we pulled him out at the right time and bought him into a calm pleasant devoted house with just us two no barking rabble. It was perfect for his nature. Was with us 24/7 except bedtime. So he’s non presence is dia! We chose to let him go before he was too bad so he wasn’t at deaths door. He still stridded into the vet after chowing down a special breakfast. Looking around wanted to leave bright eyed ready to go home for his tea but with kidney failure it was shutting him down and each day there was a difference a couple of hours before with coughing badly, lungs! I do have regrets but I still know in my mind today he’d have been in such a bad place. So no not unreasonable to say what you said I totally agree another dog straight away helps massively.
Oh what a gorgeous happy looking dog. Sincere condolences. x
My heart goes out to you. Let a dog go is the hardest thing one has to do. I’ve been there four times and still miss them. I enjoy now talking about the special times with them.
Take care and rest. It’s okay to cry. We are crying with you. 😢🫶🏻
Bless you ☺️
Hi Suffolklady ...just want to send lots of love and hugs...it is truly heartbreaking!! I lost my Jack Russell Lexi 3 years ago and can still cry about it today! Things I did to help me were to have some of her ashes in a cross around my neck, I made a mini garden out of her bed with a painted rock that I did and put some of her fave thing's in a little box with her photo on. I swore I would never have another dog....until a year later ...when I rescued two!!! (My profile pic)...I can't say they will ever replace Lexi...she was unique. Take some comfort in the fact that Paddy (who is gorgeous by the way) has obviously had a very happy life with you and been very well loved and cared for...and trust me...you'll feel his presence at times 💞 take care and the fab people on here will give great advice on the pred! 💐💐💐
Dear Suffolklady, just waking up to the news on this side of the world, and I am so sorry. These little creatures wrap themselves around our hearts and never let go. We lost our dear Mr. Boggs last year but Isidore has tampered the grief. We lost Dakota Mae six years ago, but Bentley helped me through her goodbye. There is nothing greater in the world than to love this much. Stay strong and I feel sure all of us will hold you deep in our thoughts all the way through. XOXO
I know you have had a lot of comments but as someone who has suffered from PMR since 2019 and struggles to taper down and has two small dogs my heart really does go out to you. I think putting the dose up for a short time is certainly worth doing to try and stop a big flareup.
The other suggestion I would make to you is that you look for two small companionable rescue dogs. For a long time we had one dog and then we were given a black Labrador who was a bit older. When he died we were about to buy a puppy so that we still had two dogs but were given a rescue Shitzu. Having two dogs is no extra work and they are great companions for each other. Lots of dogs like Cavalier Spaniels and Shitzus like their walks but are just as happy cuddling up on the sofa with you. To take two rescue dogs eg ex breeding bitches, would be helping the dogs and - you.
hello suffolklady. I can’t advise you on the Pred, but I just wanted to come on here and say how desperately sad I am for you.
what a gorgeous chap Paddy was looking at that lovely photo of him.
Look after yourself and hold the memories tight. x
Thank you for your reply. I am in my late 70s and live on my own I talk to my two rescue dogs as if they are human and they are my family. I wish you well and hope the heartache soon heals.x
I haven’t got any more to add, really , other than the fact that I’ve had eight wonderful dogs in my life who have given me and my family much joy . I’m down to my last dachshund, Rosie , who is my constant companion, apart from when my husband takes her out for a walk . I often have to rest and she is always by my side , day and night . I cry at the thought of her dying because I feel I am too old and infirm to care for another dog , but I do know that the joy of having another dog helps get over the loss .
I think when Rosie’s time comes we hope to get an older rescue dog and if my husband is unable to walk it by then we will look for a dog walking charity or pay someone to walk it .
I agree with Evamollie , Cavalier King Charles are very gentle and affectionate . They do like their walk but love their home comforts . We had Charlie , Jamie and Alfie - all long gone now .
I’m glad your little dog is your constant companion to you as was Paddy when I felt unwell. I love my black labs, three in total luckily living to good ages Paddy being the youngest and and although love all dogs I am not a small dog person. My Husband is the dog walker but at 78 as I said he feels he doesn’t want another one. What can I say the pain is deep atm so too early to even think and Paddy was so special we would never get one with the same traits that would make life as easy as possible. Lovely you sharing your story katiemills. X
I am so sorry about beautiful Paddy. We lost our beautiful Yellow Lab in 2021 and I still find myself in tears missing him. He is the picture when I open my ipad every day, and that helps, to look at him. I am thinking of you...
Having been through this recently can I say how sad I am for you. I didn't increase my pred and perhaps that's why I've had weeks of serious back issues. Maybe not. I won't advise on pred reduction. The loss of such a loved one cannot be put into words but I truly understand your grief.
My deepfelt condolences on the loss of Paddy. He looks so lovely in the picture and I can only imagine how distressed you must be feeling at the moment.
Please accept my condolences for the loss of your beloved Paddy. He was adorable! I went through the same thing 2 1/2 years ago with my cat and I am still mourning him. My heart goes out to you.
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