Firstly, let me give a sincere, heartfelt "Thank you" to all of you who sent me a private message, or put a comment on one of my posts, asking if I was "okay." What a lovely, caring gesture... thank you!
Apparently the isolation and boredom had finally gotten to me... I started believing (...and I use that loosely) that the HealthUnlocked site (where I was sending more and more time each day) was my "reality" and that my "reality," was some kind of virtual, simulated environment.
Weird, right? Like being stuck in "Opposite Day," and "Groundhog Day," at the same time!
I found myself becoming overly involved in (and often perturbed by) posts and comments, with which I disagreed. Incapable of taking my own advise to "disregard," and/or "ignore" these posts/comments, I HAD to comment, HAD to respond, HAD to state my opinion, especially if it differed from that of the writer's! Searching for the writer's "true meaning" became an obsession. Analysing the hell out of posts/comments to find the true "meaning," was a game, which I played way to often!
I took nothing at face value. Everything had a deeper, hidden meaning and I found I could no longer relate to the posts about gardens, weather and dogs. And I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and talking about PMR, GCA, Meds, tapering, side effects, symptoms, etc. etc. etc. I craved a discussion, dialogue, debate!
Realising this wasn't necessarily a good thing (especially on a forum such as this) I realised, it was time to "take a break," and a "chill pill." So I checked-out and enjoyed some, much needed "alone time."
I read a few books, contemplated life, analysed myself and my intentions... and realised I needed to make amends.
***ahem*** Here's the part where I apologise.
If I have ever "lectured" you, given you "what for," or in any way disrespected or responded to you in a cheeky, insolent manner, I AM TRULY SORRY. Seriously, I am.
I have no excuse.
Well... other than, I guess it's possible, that I was abducted by aliens and they were performing some weird, scientific experiments on me! I mean, I can't actually prove that didn't happen, so...
In any case, I believe I have performed the necessary lobotomy that will ensure, I am not (going forward) an OVERLY passionate, opinionated, know-it-all, wisenheimer!
However... please don't expect miracles!!!!
I have not had a brain/personality transplant! I am still me! I will still RANT. I will still share my opinion; be vocal and speak my truth... I will just try to remember that you have the right to speak your truth as well and that it's okay if we disagree.
Yes, take comfort in knowing that my alone time was for everyone's safety.
All is now well.