I am planning to go Thursday with my daughter and grandchildren to Memphis Tennessee to sightsee and visit my oldest grandson and his wife. My grandson is in the ministry there. Another granddaughter along with her husband and baby are driving down at the same time. We have our reservations booked at Graceland Guesthouse and tours etc. My problem is that I have a history of anxiety and right now I am so anxiety ridden that I don’t see how I am going to go. The prednisone has made my anxiety go through the roof to the point that I’m sick to my stomach. I should be looking forward to the trip and I was but the closer it gets the worse the anxiety gets. I have meds but have hardly had to take them. This is my first trip since PMR and I guess I’m afraid of what I won’t be able to do.
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Lanakay
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Don't worry about what you might not be able to do - enjoy what you can manage. I also have to really psych myself up to start any trip - but it is fine once I'm underway.
Look at "to sightsee and visit my oldest grandson and his wife" the other way round: " visit my oldest grandson and his wife and to sightsee". And you have a room at the Guesthouse to retreat to.
If you have meds - take them. Then go and enjoy your family.
Explain to your family, that some days you may be better than others, and that doing too much is not good for you, you may need “rest” periods.
Don’t make a drama out of it, just say “I think Ill sit and have a coffee, if you want to go and see such and such I’ll be fine, see you later”. That’s always works with mine, during and post GCA!
Enjoy the time with your grandchildren, they change so quickly - the sights don’t! You can always catch them another time!
I can really empathise with your mounting anxiety. A healthy you would love all of this. Can you explain to your family how your condition might effect you and that you may have to dip in and out of activities and go to rest in your room? I hope that they are loving and understanding. You will be so proud of yourself if you do it. Take it one hour at a time and insist on resting. Perhaps you need to start taking your anxiety meds. now to deal with the build-up. I hope you find it within yourself to go, a change is so good for us. You are lucky to have family that want to take you places. And yes, you really are good enough, always! 🌻
This may not be ofhelp, but years ago I went to a "Mind and body 3 day meetup" well all that was said there was true, 95% of what if's never happen....and they are what stress us!......my husband doesn't do what ifs......and yes it's mainly women.😞
They taught us to be strong with ourselves about it, and then sit quietly and picture yourself......looking round Graceland.......with love me tender on in the background!!....It might just help....
Can't say I master it every time......but it certainly helps......I
Good luck, keep us posted....
Ohhhh Lanakay, I can so relate... I have suffered with anxiety/panic attacks for years. I had them pretty much under control until I started on the high doses of Pred. Now I don't actually "have" an anxiety attack, but I sit endlessly on the verge! I'm not sure what's worse? What a shame to miss a trip like that with your family. Can your doctor order you some low dose Diazepam?
I had the same anxiety before my first trip. But I found that being upfront in advance with my relatives about my need to pace myself helped relieve my stress.
Will you be traveling by yourself? Flying? If so do get wheelchair assistance. Why risk using up spoons on the trip when you want them for the visit. Sounds lovely.
Thank you everybody. I am so looking forward to this trip. I told them that there may be time when I just need to hang out at the hotel while they go on another adventure. That’s ok. Thanks to all of you for being so supportive!
Hi there just to let you know, I too am going on a trip to see my son in Vancouver. I’ve had PMR for 3 years and I’m only 57 and my anxiety about this trip was getting way out of hand until one day I just said to myself,
‘I’m not going to let this aniety ruin my time with my son. this is a trip of a lifetime and I’m going to enjoy it. So I focus on what I can control and trust that what I can’t control, which is basically the future, I trust will be ok when I get there.’
Not easy I know when anxiety tries to get you in it’s grasp, but I’m determined. Hope you have a good trip.
I have been back and forth from UK to USA lots of times with PMR and never had a problem. No flares. Nothing. So if you can conquer your anxiety don't worry about your PMR. Try to go. It will be fantastic for you to see your family. Family is the best. Go see your GP and get something to keep your anxiety in check and then just go and enjoy. Think of all the memories you will have. Bon voyage.
The way I deal with anxiety is to do it anyway...whatever “it” happens to be. Prednisone has made me more anxious and edgier. In June it will be a year of PMR accompanying me on life’s journey. There is always some difficult situation to deal with. Push through, smile and later look back and endorse yourself for doing the best you could. Gentle, slow and imperfect is what we’ve got!
A friend taught me that if you must worry, do it sequentially. It works, when considering the worries and choosing to focus on just what's next, it takes away the overwhelming part of things. A single worry you can make a plan for which leads to less anxiety. It also forces you to see that most worries are not worth the time we give them.
Yes understand where you're coming from Lanakay. There was a similar post a few days ago about stepping out of our comfort zone. Try taking one hour at a time. When you start visualising what could happen try to stop the thoughts and just cope with the next hour. To have in your mind that you may have to stop and rest and not be able to join in everything and to let everyone know beforehand certainly helps me. Hope your family will be very understanding of your circumstances even if they don't understand the condition. Best wishes Jackie. Also if you need the extra medication I would just take it.
Ok, true confessions. Whenever I travel, I have to take a Xanax. I start getting anxiety the minute that I leave the house for the airport. I'm not afraid of flying; not afraid of the plane going down. But the procedures at the airport for some reason brings on anxiety. So much so, that I get all of the tell-tale signs: sweating palms, heart rate goes up, flushed face, etc. I know it's crazy that such a simple thing would bring on such an exaggerated response and I'm not really sure what is provoking it, but it happens every time I travel on a plane. So...I take the meds! No need to suffer if a little pill will help. I think you should take them, too, since you've been Rx'd them.
My bestie and I take one trip each year together. The last trip (and the first since diagnosis) was a real eye-opener. (Or should I say eye-closer as I actually fell asleep during/at some of the events that we did.)
This is what I learned from it: 1. No longer is it land and then hit the ground running (as a tourist). Just flying was enough stress that it took a toll on me. We discussed it and came to the conclusion that the first day of any future trips will be land, get to hotel, relax (maybe a coffee shop to people watch) and then dinner. No museums, tours, shows, etc. Get there, relax, eat.
Day 2: Look at the itinerary of what we'd normally do and then pick what's the most important. No more packing back to back to back events. One or two things with a break in between for rest is plenty. Dinner...early evening. Repeat next day.
As you are travelling with a lot of people, and children, that may be a bit more activity than you are used to. If me, I'd download Uber and have it handy in case you want to make an escape back to the hotel. If you've never used it, it's super easy. Don't even have to exchange money and pretty fast response. Also, look around when you are at places for a bench, etc., that you could take a break at. Don't be afraid to say, 'you guys go ahead, I think I'll just rest here and do some people watching.'
You can do this! And it will be so nice for you to see your family and grandchildren. But, you'll have to do it on your terms and not theirs. Don't feel bad about sending them on to do something if you don't feel the energy or the 'want to do'. (Amazing how my 'want to do's' have changed. It's got to be pretty special for me to want to do it these days. I've become 'hunkered down' -- love that expression. Thanks SnazzyD. And why spend energy on things that I don't want to do? Is that too self-absorbed?)
Go, have fun, enjoy your family, and do some things that really appeal to you. Pass on the other things, send them on, you find a nice spot to relax, have a cuppa (as they say here) and people watch.
We'll look forward to hearing your adventures and maybe seeing some pictures.
Thank you so much. I have the Uber app downloaded and have used it before. I also booked myself on a bus tour on a day that everyone else is going to do a lot of running from one place to another. I am trying to cover me bases. And yes I will definitely take a pill if I need to. Thank you again for your support. And I must tell you I was shopping today and met a clerk with PMR. We chatted awhile. It was a highlight of my day. She is the first person I’ve met “in person” with PMR.
Oh, that’s wonderful. Which part of your response? All of it! Bus tours can be so much fun and you learn so many interesting things about the locale. Great on Uber, hopefully, you won’t need it, but just in case it’s at your fingertips. And wow on meeting someone else with PMR. How long has she had it? Is she on Pred? Did you tell her about this community? That’s cool!
Have a great time on your trip. Sounds like you’ve already started thinking how to take care of yourself and still do the sites. You go, girl!
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