I had been suffering from symptoms of B12D for over a year before it all came to a head and I collapsed and ended up in A&E.
My partner knew something wasn't right with me and kept telling me to go to my GP. But I didn't.
He maintains that if I'd listened to him I wouldn't have had to go through the collapse which was extremely terrifying for him - he thought I was dying.
IMO if I had gone to the GP I wouldn't have got any help as he was useless afterwards and I found out what was wrong with me not him. But my partner refuses to accept this.
Can anyone help me to convince him he is wrong?
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charks
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I went to different doctors and still collapsed, because they didn't know what was wrong with me. B12 deficiency had been 'ruled out' due to an in range b12 level.In the end I ordered an MMA test on my own that showed the deficiency. The only advice I got from my GP after that was: "Well, you can try taking b12 then." No mention of injections.
Why does someone need to be right? Could you both not consider each other’s POV? He was scared when you collapsed and thinks it could have been avoided….while you are more pragmatic and know the pitfalls of the medical world and their lack of knowledge of B12, so you’re taking charge of your health & research.
Is it important who is right or wrong, maybe you should have seen your GP before but it's happened now. B12 is actually not something that is commonly checked for, unless you have an iron deficiency. Your GP was probably useless afterwards because you had been diagnosed, what else was he meant to do! If you had lots of symptoms before hand why didn't you go to GP?I hope you get sorted now and the process isn't to long
I wasn't diagnosed. I was in A&E for over 7 hours and they found nothing. But they were very slap dash. They didn't bother to give me a brain scan. They weren't busy. It was during Covid and I was the only patient.
I diagnosed myself. By chance. A&E did find out that I had diabetes type 2. Researching it I found out that it can be 'reversed' by losing weight. So I cut out bread and cakes and, after a couple of days, realised that my acid reflux and bloated stomach had disappeared. Doing yet more research I read an article that said celiacs should take B12. At this point I was still recovering from my collapse. I couldn’t walk or talk properly. But within a few days of taking a high dose of oral B12 I got dramatically better. And suddenly my eye sight got much better as well.
It was over 2 months until I got to see my GP and my B12 level was approx 270 so the GP dismissed my theory that I was B12D. I always wonder what my level was before I started taking B12. But he referred me to a neurologist because of the fact that I had been unconscious for over 30 minutes during my collapse. I asked to be referred to Addenbrookes. The neurologist agreed with me and said that it was highly likely I had been B12D because my recovery was so rapid. He requested my GP to give me blood tests and surprise surprise I had PA.
I didn't go to the GP because of my mental state, basically I couldn't be bothered. This was during covid and I didn't even get dressed most days.
Hi charks...please can I ask what dose vitamin b12 you took...I'm hoping not to have to go down the injections route & looking to supplement if possible. Hope you are well 🙏
I take about 3 droppers a day of 5,000 mcg sublingual liquid. However taking it sublingually wasn't very effective for me - I find it works much better diluted in water and then drank. I usually split it into 6 doses as passive absorption is very slow and having some B12 in my gut all the time gives my gut more time to aborb it.
It’s not helpful for your partner to argue with you over this as it’s done now . I knew I had Pa and I’ve still collapsed after surgery. And GPSs are not great at diagnosing it. If your partner is a nice person may be it frightened them so much they are traumatised by it. It might be better to focus on addressing that rather than berating you. May you both be well.
You are both right! And very black and white thinking is part of the neurological response to lack of B12.
Embrace duality.
Did they discover your low B12 in A&E? What was the blood count?
It sounds like your partner needs reassurance that it won't happen again. And they need thanking. If you collapsed and they hadn't been there, would you have recovered? They will be mulling over the long term consequences of you being ill.
Listen to what you put them through, without comment or judgement, and certainly don't belittle their emotions. You need them to keep an eye on the bigger picture.
Also acknowledge that you yourself have been through something very stressful, even if you don't remember it. Why didn't you go to the Dr. before?
Yes, the chances are the GP wouldn't have spotted it, unless your deficiency was very obvious in a blood test. And you would have got labelled "worried well" or "TATT", maybe you have been in the past. Maybe they would . You can't play that game. You can only deal with reality.
Have you got a conclusive diagnosis that your GP accepts and is acting on?
No point raking over what could have been. I'm sure theres plenty we would all change in our lives, knowing what we know now, "if we could go back". No time machines currently available to check the hypothesis 😁 Doesn't help to work over that stuff, just learn from the past and keep on keepin on.
I think your partner is still suffering the trauma of nearly losing you. Just listen to them - you have done nothing wrong but perhaps recognising each others feelings will help. Sometimes just saying I am sorry I didn’t listen can help the other person. I have been in your shoes and it’s a tough path to walk but communication is key.
Hi, I know you might not want to hear this, but it has been part of my recovery journey.
I have found that when I was/am struggling .. I am not a good judge of how well or bad I actually am. Brain fog and fatigue etc cloud my judgement.
I have learned to “listen” (quite hard for me to do sometimes!) when my husband tells me I am not quite right. I also have a very good and trusted frank friend that I can ask if I am doubting him or myself.
I would say that for me, if my loved ones say something is wrong, action is better than no action. Good luck on your journey.
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SACD
Been back to the GP but was shot down in flames again. At my wits end 
Need help as mental health failing my son
I'm new but learning fast.
Neurologist saying B12 is a 'red herring' - what should I do? :/
