In a word ‘knackered’! moan time

[Chickens44]

Hope I’m allowed to use that word. I am in my 5th week of SI EOD following visit to Dr Klein.

I am absolutely exhausted. The fatigue is awful and my pains are all over and worse. I was expecting it to get worse before I start to see any improvement so not totally unexpected. But I am supposed to be going away on Saturday to Dorset and was really looking forward to it, but I could cry. I don’t think I am going to be able to enjoy it which upsets me. I shall still go, as nothing is going to stop me.

But could do with some glimmer of improvement to keep me going. I have had brain fog and fatigue and burning pain for nearly 20 years (diagnosed with fibromyalgia), so may take me a long time before I see any results.

So sorry, this is just a moan really. 😫☹️

[Narwhal10]

Hey Chickens44,

Yes you can use the word, knackered. Sorry to learn you feel absolutely horrible. You are allowed to moan, rant, cry, swear and even a throw all your toys out of the pram. We understand because we have the illness.

Going away is a big thing, packing bags, getting there, staying wherever, getting home, unpacking, recovering. So, one thing at a time. When was the last time you went away whilst feeling this horrible (if the right word) ? If you have low expectations of I’m in Dorset, I made it here even though I feel dreadful. It may be easier. If you get upset then you get upset. It is not your fault that you or any of us have this.

I do not know how long you are staying. You may think something along the lines of, Today, I am having ice cream. If I want it for breakfast I will. Tomorrow, I’m going to see the beach and only the fish are allowed to talk to me. Everyone else has to buy tickets and queue.

Be gentle with yourself, grab a blanket, try and get comfy, have a big cry with a cuddly toy for a bit and then slowly does it.

I have days when I call myself a Miserable Toad, I ignore my emails, texts because I need to look after me.

Sending a gentle hug, cariad.

[Chickens44 in reply to Narwhal10]

Thanks. My thoughts are I can feel rubbish in Dorset just as well as I can at home. I have been down before a couple of times and didn’t feel my best. I don’t have any expectations, it will be just nice to see the sea, look at a different sky and visit with my cousins, who are very understanding of my limitations. I stock up with M&S ready meals and a couple of bottles of wine and I’m all set.

[Myoldcat in reply to Chickens44]

Chickens44, that sounds a good change of scene and I echo Narwhal's advice and your thoughts, to have no great expectations and take things very easy. It's a holiday so you're allowed to sleep and do nothing if that's what you need. Your cousins sound kind and supportive, so that's very positive in itself. The first few weeks of healing were rough for me; every day a buffet of new and not-so-exciting symptoms! But it has slowly improved and now I find myself doing things I haven't done for a good while - longer walks, having some energy, not going to bed at 8pm! Good luck, and hope your trip goes ok x

[ClaireWF1346]

Hoping you can enjoy your trip away and squeeze in as many naps as needed 😘

[Wheat]

hello, I'm knackered too, it's quite usual at times.

As others have said, I think a change of scene will help stimulate your mood. Take things leisurely and pamper yourself. Best wishes for your holiday! x