Taking time off work

[Hannah1589]

I have either an ovarian tumour or ovarian cancer - won’t know until surgery probably in a few weeks time. Had CT scan this morning. I’m struggling to know what to do about work. I teach part time (I have young children). My head is all over the place and I don’t know whether to just face work until I’m off for surgery, or take time out now. Physically I’m ok to work, I have slight pain but not too bad, it’s more the overwhelm of the whole situation and the fact that I do a student facing job and therefore I am on show all the time. My thoughts are racing all over the place but on the other hand maybe work will be a distraction and help pass the time until I find out if it is cancer or not. What have others done in this situation?

[SASSY196]

Why not talk it through with your Head of Department/ Head etc? Teaching is a tough job ( although also wonderful) on a good day( I used to teach ) but it requires your all.

[Hannah1589 in reply to SASSY196]

Thanks, fortunately I teach in a college and only do 1 day and two evenings so not as intense as a school job. I’ve arranged to speak to manager to talk it through.

[Hannah1589 in reply to Hannah1589]

doesn’t help that it’s my first week with these students. Part of me feels I want to meet them so they know who I am before I go off for surgery.

[doodoolatrice]

Hi, im sorry you're in this situation. My boys were 9 and 13 when i was where you are now. I was only given a weeks notice for my op and as i worked alongside someone who was extremely negative i decided to stop work there and then. I felt an enormous sense of relief and spent the week spring cleaning the house and writing endless lists for hubby. By the time i went into hospital everything was organised and I felt more in control so giving up work when i did was the best thing for me. Hugs Kerry x

[Hannah1589 in reply to doodoolatrice]

Thanks for sharing your experience. I think if I knew surgery was in a week I would do that. I was told probably it will be 3-4 weeks after the MDT meeting on Friday. Think the wait is making it harder to know what to do. Also don’t know much about the surgery yet. I will be told on Friday after they’ve reviewed all my scans. My boys are 5 and 3.

Going to speak to my manager today. I’m teaching this afternoon. Might give work a go and see how I feel about it after.

[LesleyGB in reply to Hannah1589]

Hi. I was diagnosed just before lockdown and like the rest of the world worked at home. I worked during chemo and after my op. I did find it much better to keep involved with work and most of the time worked full time with little naps as and when necessary. I work in Student Admin in a uni and could attend exam boards, other meetings , and have meetings with students (members of staff or PhD students) all via teams. I was particularly keen to keep going as we were undergoing a Uni wide restructuring of student services, which was causing lots of bad feeling and confusion, and I didn't want to "abandon" the lovely team I work with as the programme I deal with is quite complex. It definitely made me feel more normal - though there were a few surprised faces when I popped up bald online! My colleagues were amazingly supportive and there would have been no problem if I had taken lots of time off if I needed to but luckily I didn't! I've been back in the office since before Christmas full time and much prefer it (though sometimes seem to have most of the building to myself!) I really think if working makes you feel better, work, but don't hesitate to take time off if you feel you need to. Good luck with everything. x

[Lovedogs41]

hi hannah

If you still feel up to it I would continue with work.It will distract you and help keep your mind busy and its also the social side to going to work isnt it,thats so important I think,chatting with colleagues/friends etc and also just having a little you time away from the busy home environment is beneficial mentally take care x

[Caleda4]

Hi, If i was in your shoes I would definitely be going to work and try to keep things as normal as possible,with family etc. I know this is a difficult time for you,but work would be a huge distraction during the time you are waiting. Once you get a plan in place you will feel somewhat better and you will be able to steer your way through things.

Wishing you good luck with your operation. x

[Hannah1589]

Ended up agreeing to take this week off (I only work Monday and Tuesday). I just couldn’t cope when it came to it and was in no state to stand up and teach. Hadn’t appreciated that I have had a lot to process as only found out Friday that it is a tumour rather than a simple cyst. May go back next week if I feel up to it. Hoping seeing consultant Friday will help as will hopefully have more of a plan in place.

[Wooooo]

I was open with work and worked up to the date of my surgery. I was initially told surgery would be in 2 weeks but it ended up being 6 weeks. Work was a very welcome distraction. My job is very intense and prople facing too. It wasnt easy but for me it was the best decision.

Unfortunately i had a few post op complications and have only just been able to return to work 6 months post op. I dont feel at all ready to go back but financially have no option but to do so. If i had taken more time off pre op I would have to have returned one month ago which would have been very difficult.

Wishing you all the best with your surgery and beyond

[delia2]

If I were you I’d work as long as possible. You will find as you go through treatment or recovery from surgery that your greatest desire is to go back to your “normal “ life. I think working will help with your self-confidence and will distract you. Also as you said meeting the students now will make it easier if you are able to return this term. If you have to have chemo your schedule might allow you to keep teaching, depending how you feel. I had six bad days each cycle but many people only have two or three. However you do have your kids to take care of as well, so you need energy for that! Good luck! Xx

[Hannah1589 in reply to delia2]

Thanks. I had one day off when I had my CT scan, and as I was still quite shaken up and it was difficult telling my work the situation. But then decided to work after that. I’m very part time anyway. I was glad to meet my new students and have some normality. I need the distraction for now. Helps to know that work are happy for me to take some time out should I feel I need it but for now I’m going to keep going.

[Maus123]

Hi Hannah. I feel for you. That's maybe one of the worst parts of the journey, regardless of outcome. That limbo nightmare prior to having surgery and a tangible diagnosis.

When I was in your situation, I received a sick note from my GP and signed off work, from the day of initial diagnosis, with surgery already scheduled for 13 days hence. I did feel fairly crappy, carrying about 10 liters worth of ascites around (these days it's just bodyfat.. debatable what's worse ) and being short of breath all the time. Couldn't focus on job or anything else either, not even on the threat of likely having to cough up the dough for my debulking surgery on my own, since it was looking like the EU health insurance might not cover me having surgery in a different country (was in Germany for a family visit at time of diagnosis).

So basically: From the moment I received the initial suspected diagnosis, I turned into a walking piece of bread with frequent weepy moments, plopped down and didn't move again until I had somewhat recovered from surgery.

Also, I was in an office job at the time, working for a large company, so I had the opprtunity to not only brief my boss on the situation, but also speak with OHS (occupational health services) and they turned out to be very supportive.

Hope you can activate your support network too, and maybe talk to your GP and work on whether it would make sense to take the days before surgery off...

Wish you the best for surgery and staging. xx. Maus