I know this isn't strictly about Ovarian cancer but my partner has just walked out on myself and my 3 young children 2 weeks after being diagnosed with GCT.
I'm so distraught right now.
Has anyone else had their partners leave them while going through treatment?
No, my husband has stuck by me, but just wanted to send you a big hug. Life just isn't fair sometimes!
Barbara
Oh gosh you poor thing. Are there friends or family you can reach out to? Sending you a jolly big virtual ((hug)) for what it's worth. Jemima xx
I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I know it seems as though it is the end of the world right now but you will get through this. You have to think of yourself and your children and call in the help and support of your family and friends. Take a deep breath and keep assuring yourself that others care about you and want to do anything they can to help. Big hugs and love Carole H x
Cannot believe it!! I am so sorry luv-hang in there. Your friends & family will need to seriously rally. Also, do do ask for counselling / you must be assisted in thought as well as deed to see that this man is weak while your strength makes you rise above it. Praise all the powers that be for your kids- let them see how real courage makes a fine human being.
My 2 sons are beyond wonderful & WE HAVE these children. Many many women don't.
Hello Lovely,
I know of someone who is in remission from cancer and her husband dumped her about 5 days ago, they like you have children together, unfortunately he was having an affair with my sister, I'm ashamed to say, it all came out last year but the lady in remission didn't believe what she was being told by various people including my mum so now she believes what she was told by people last year.
WE'RE women for a reason to show how strong we all are, and I believe ladies going through cancer are stronger than those of us who are just supporting. I'm a supporter of someone with cancer, she amazes me everyday. If you need to chat please inbox me I will always answer xxx
Good riddance. You have your children and your loving friends so just dump this creature from your thoughts. You deserve better and may be your treatment is there to get rid of all the buggers in your life: cancer and this creature alike.
You take good care Hun. 😍😘
I can understand you're distraught as it must feel so raw. However anyone who can do this so soon after your diagnosis is quite weak. Maybe he isn't thinking straight just now, some people find illness very hard to cope with. He may come to his senses, if for no other reason than to help the children through this. Is there anyone in his family who can have a good conversation with him and / or suggest counselling? However, you must concentrate on yourself and eventually you may realise you're better off without him. In the meantime, you will need others to help you right now, especially with three young children. And you need someone to talk to, too.
All the very best at this difficult time.
Yes this did happen to me.
It is such a huge betrayal because it adds cruelty to the mix which is so hard to bear.
I very much felt that it was beyond me to deal with both things at once. Of course I cried and railed and suffered my broken heart but the treatment and strength required to recover from it became more important. Inevitably.
It is still beyond my understanding that men who supposedly loved us can behave like this. Your health will take priority and those around you will take care of you.
Don't rush recovery and be aware that there are others that have been there and come out the other side.
So sorry you have this to deal with.
Sending you big hugs!
I also do not have a supportive husband (I think some men can't cope with having to be strong for us) and sometimes we have to learn the hard way that we can be stronger on our own 💗
I am so very sorry this happened. How unfair! Definitely yell, scream, cry, throw his things out the window and then realize that doing this alone, but with supportive family and friends is 100% better than having to deal with someone who won't and can't accept your disease and be there for you.
I am divorced and have been for 27 years. Way before my diagnosis. I realized many times throughout those 27 years of raising 3 daughters alone that he would not have been supportive anyway. He was to self absorbed.
But I do feel some counseling and much hand holding and hugs is needed to help you navigate this new reality. You aren't alone. We are these ladies and gents have been thru it all. You have to concentrate on you right now. Your health and well-being is crucial to your family.
Your husband may just be scared and fleeing is his reaction to that fear if the unknown. I hope he seeks counseling, also.
I'm so sorry that you now have to deal with this on top of everything else! Wish I lived close enough to pop around and give you a hug and some practical help. I'm not going to put my thoughts about your partner into words as most of them are unrepeatable!
Concentrate on you and your children, I hope your family and friends rally round for you. Sending virtual hugs and support xxx
Thank you all for your kind comments.
He left me last year because he was having an affair (came back after 2 weeks as he said he realised it was he he wanted) ended it supposedly. We cancelled our wedding which was due a few months later because it wouldn't have been right to go ahead at that time.
Then I became unwell.
He's gone back to her, doesn't love me enough apparently.
Seriously I'm lost beyond words at how someone can be so vile and cruel.
The last year of my life has been mental torture and I know I will come out the other end a stronger happier person but right now I honestly do not know where I'm going to muscle up any strength from 😢😢😢
You are so right, you will come out the other end stronger and happier. Keep reminding yourself of that.
Bless you, you have hidden depths of strength that will get you through this. You are better without somebody who isn't strong enough to support you and who you don't have to be brave for, try to channel your rage into getting better. You are a wonderful woman, you are strong and you are beautiful. You can do this, sending you so many encouraging wishes, lots of hugs and love ❤xx Jane
You will come out of this a stronger person! Gather your kids and your family around you ,you and they are all that matter.
Sorry love,he's your kids father and you will always have that link but I won't say what I think of him, you are worth a ton better.
Re group and we are always here for support and a rant or natter,
Lots of love and positive wishes,
Carole xxx
For now take it day by day week by week. Do not let this man back into your life again. You have enough to deal with right now. I really hope you have support from family and friends and you will get their help through treatment.
This is awful my deepest sympathies you and your children deserve so much more. I was single when diagnosed and I still am
I read these things sometimes and just can't help but imagine myself in the same situation. I can't imagine this one. We all cope with things differently, but no matter how we do that, we can't avoid having to go through the stages of grief at the loss of a dream. Your children will be grieving, too. I would truly ask for some therapy, only because you will have trouble seeing things objectively. Your children will need to see that you will be there for them, and that you will be strong enough for all of you. I pray that you find that strength, and that you'll ask for support when you need it. Never give a man the power to cripple you. If you're strong enough to fight this hideous disease, you're strong enough to conquer the world. ❤ I send my warmest wishes.
I'm so sorry you have found yourself in this position. Perhaps as someone else said, he can't cope with illness. Its awful that he has run back to this woman too.
You will get through this, you are strong and you have your children to keep you going. But, you need to concentrate on getting better too. I do hope you have some family or good friends that can lend a hand when you don't feel so good. You will also have to address practical issues with your partner, eg finances, he can't just walk away from his children too.
I wish I could give you a hug, you have not only your recent diagnosis to contend with, you have to deal with the children's emotions at this time too. Its very sad that he is such a selfish person who appears to be thinking only of himself. Be strong.
Ann xx
You will come out of this a stronger person. Your children will help you find this strength. At the end of this you won't want him back even if he wants you. Stay strong and I know it is easy for us to say these things to you when you are feeling so sad. Sending a big hug xx
So sorry you are going through such a hard time and having to deal with that also, just wanted to say you are beautiful and to never doubt yourself because ur partner leaving is ur partners weakness not yours, stay strong and take care❤❤❤
That's dreadful. As others have said, do get yourself as much support as you can, and some counselling if it's available. It sounds as though you will be better off without him unless he comes tombs senses very quickly. It must be an awful shock for the children too and they will also need support xx
My husband was very supportive the first time I had OC despite a heavy workload and doing all the housework but after each recurrence and more disability on my part the sympathy has definitely run out and I think he feels trapped.He has now retired and I am feeling increasingly as if I am a burden despite having learned not to moan.Concentrate on your children and getting better.You are better of without the stress of a difficult relationship.
We shouldn't be surprised at how people (men here, as so often) behave, but we always are. I'm spitting on your behalf. If your children are his children too, then even more so.
There seems to be a general shortage of grown ups around at the moment - not only in the White House.
This disease is tough for everyone. Most friends, family and partners do their best to support and the best isn't always terribly good. But they tried. Having someone opt out completely is just pathetic and horrible.
We should remember those women who have left relationships as a result of OC. It does throw everything up in the air all round.
Wishing you all the very best in the situation you could really really have done without at the moment. xx
I am so sorry to hear about your experience but please know that somehow through all this you will find an inner strength that you did not know existed even though at this time, it feels awful.
I have a good friend who had breast cancer. She had marriage problems before her cancer, but the cancer finally made her realise what was wrong in her relationship and she left HIM, as he was useless and unhelpful. Skip forward a few months and she met someone new and is more in love than she has been in the 20 years and happier than ever.
My point is to maintain your faith and that you will meet someone you deserve.
I was going to suggest that he might be struggling with your illness too. It is incredibly hard on men and they do not get much credit through the process and they do not receive much support from services or other male friends. I hear this a lot. But then I saw you had mentioned an affair. That changes things love.... You are better off with someone you trust and deserve...
Sending you love xxx
I'm so sorry to hear that, I hope and pray things will get better for you💕
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