hi,iam just starting out on my journey and very scared

[honiton]

i was told 3 weeks ago that i have advanced ovarian cancer treatment start next week 3,3weekly chemo then a op then the same amount of chemo again,iam trying to stay positive but having a bad day today been over come by fear is this normal

[Hidden]

Hi, I would say its perfectly normal to be overcome by fear and anxiety. Sandra,s journey started in 2009, with her like others, embarking on the unknown was a daunting prospect but she is still here. The good news is that your first line of treatment Carboplatin/Taxol ( I presume) every 3 weeks is still regarded the best way of dealing with this disease with a high percentage getting a good response and many will benefit from a period of remission. I am not going to pretend it is an easy journey because it isnt, but before you know it, you will have completed the 6 treatments and look back and maybe feel it was not as bad as imagined. You will get plenty of support from the ladies on this site. Love Paul xx

[Hidden]

Hi there ... I would echo Paul in that it's normal to be anxious. That's what is seen on this site quite a lot anyway. I wasn't so much afraid of the treatment. I was more afraid of the outcome and wanted to get through it all to get some answers. For me, psychologically, some days were better than others. I was fortunate to start chemo in June so I could sit in the garden which brightened my spirits. Friends here will be a support to you if that's what you want.... Love to you. T xx

[TrishLey]

Hi There. Firstly remember you are not alone. We are all here even if you never see us and we never meet you, we are standing right beside you. We understand and have gone through the initial stages just like you. My journey started in Sept 2011 advanced like yourself. I am still here as are many others. Take things one day at a time for now and remember its ok to be afraid don't be tough on yourself. My treatment started in October and it was dark and dreary but I loved sitting in by the fire and writing and reading and catching up on TV shows I'd been too busy to watch, then when the bright days came I had finished treatment. Wishing you every strength to cope with this - Trish

[lassi]

Hello, yes its normal to have fear and to have bad day's as well, we have all been there and still get them now so don't feel that you are not normal. Wishing you luck with your chemo and surgery, hang on in there, we are all here for you if you need us. Love Trish xx

[Hidden]

Hi Honiton, goodness me, yes of course your fear is normal. My heart goes out to you, it's such hard work staying positive all the time. You'll feel not only fear but a range of lots of emotions, your mind will be in a turmoil, I'm sure. Do look after yourself, and don't expect too much from yourself. Positive thoughts and please accept a virtual massive [[[hug]]] from me xx

[wendydee]

Hi! What you're feeling is completely normal, I echo the comments of other friends on here. There are many successful treatments and several good options for follow up treatment if it's needed. Have you had a look on the website ovacome.org.uk - there are Factsheets on there with lots of info, under the 'resources' heading. There are also details of the helpline, which is staffed by nurses. Good luck with your treatment. Do come back on here snd let us know how you're doing. Even if it's just to say 'Help!!!!!!'

All the best

Love Wendy xx

[Hidden]

Dear Honiton,

I am sorry that you have found yourself in this situation, you have come to the right place for support, so welcome to the club that no one wants to join, OC is a very isolating disease... this is why on this site we have grown a bond with each other because we understand what each other are going through.

However we are all different and respond differently to treatment and even OC is different in each of us too... so don't get yourself too bogged down when things are not going right for some people...there is a nurse led telephone helpline too.. if you need advice this is the number to ring 0845 371 0554...

It is normal to be scared... Sending you love and best wishes x G x

[baxbird]

Hiya, like you I am a newbie to this disease and i

the journey it's going to take me on.

I'm lucky enough(?) to be in atrial that I have weekly chemo, and I've just had my 3rd week so only just ahead of you.

I too have advanced ( and as seen in a drs letter but not mentioned to me yet, aggressive - hate that word) stage 3c OC.

I can talk the talk of being positive, and can't see the future as being negative, but still it is at the back of your mind.

I will echo though that there are many on here who have battled through for years, linger than I initially thought was going to be possible. That's given me hope and a belief in the future, whatever that might be.

I'm nit worried about the chemo, that's a need, I do have concerns about the surgery in the middle but I'm sure most of us have that.

It's horrible, but it's a blip in your life pattern.

Hang in there

Dawn xx

[Whippit in reply to baxbird]

Hi Dawn, Just thought I'd mention something about the word 'aggressive'. I was told I had aggressive fast-growing tumours and that really frightened me - but guess what - my 'fast-growing' tumours grow slowly in me - so just because some of us have a poor start doesn't mean to say it's necessarily bad news. I was diagnosed in March 2011, and sailed through the chemo with very few side-effects. It's a difficult balancing act on a site like this - some women do have rotten times but it's also important to read the good-news stories to keep you upbeat.

I really hope the chemo is going well and you're finding the friendships on this site helpful.

xxx love Annie

[baxbird in reply to Whippit]

Thank you so much for putting my mind at rest with the aggressive word. Just didn't like the sound of it!

[citrine]

It would be surprising if you didn't have bad days and feel scared. It is, for many of us, the most traumatic event we've had to face. The diagnosis usually comes as a shock. Just remember, you are not alone. We are here for you. Let us know how you are going on.

Love Mary xx

[Seren18]

The diagnosis is the worst bit, after that you will just get on with it and before you know it the weeks will have flown past and are not as bad as you think.Chin up and march on. Gillx

[Izzystep]

Hello honiton. Sorry to hear the news that you have OC but you have found the best site on the There are many ladies (and a few gents) that will give you honest opinions and will listen to you every step of the way.

Most of us have had chemo, op and then chemo. There are lots of side effects of chemotherapy and some ladies sail through their treatment with very few side effects and others tick them off the list as they get them. All I can say is take each one as a blessing as you know that it is working and doing its job. Post on here your side effects as many many ladies will have fantastic advice to help you.

The operation is needed to get rid of the cancer in you. The hope is that the surgeon will get rid of the lot and then the chemo will kill off any cancerous cells left. After the op you need to rest and relax and not lift anything heavier than a bag of sugar!!! Again ladies on this site will give good tips from eating habits to what best to wear. Big knickers that go over the scar and loose leggings so comfortable.

It is normal to be worried and anxious but you will be in good hands both at hospital and in the chemo day room. It's natural to have up days and down days. During the course of the treatment you will become more positive and the time will go quickly.

Please keep us posted in how you are getting on.

Love n hugs Izzystep xxx

[Pimkin81]

As others have said fear, helplessness and anxiety are totally natural. This is probably the worst thing that can happen to someone, hearing those words is horrific.but this is the toughest part. Once you start treatment and feel like you are doing something to fight back, you'll feel a sense of control again- well at least I did! Once you get into the 'swing' of chemo it gets easier.

You'll get lots of support and tips from everyone here.

Claire

[Dyana]

Hi ,

Its such a dreadful shock and fear is ok ... Go with it and remember lots of people are around on this site and at the hospital ( hopefully ) to listen. Ovacome helpline can be so helpful ..... Take care and lots of hugs , dy xxx

[Hidden]

You would be mad (literally) if you didn't have fear about this. Perhaps it will help if I tell you that I also had very advanced and aggressive ovarian cancer 5 years ago. Surgery, chemo, lifestyle changes and lots of stress relief have given me nearly 5 years of remission since against all the odds.

Don't be too worried by what you read about 'ovarian cancer - which is in fact, many different diseases. Your disease is the only one you need to concern yourself with, so put energy into deciding what you need to do to conquer it, or keep it under control. Take advice from your medical team and others who have successfully navigated it, and design the way forward for yourself.

Very best wishes for a happy future, although the treatment phase will be necessarily challenging.

Isadora.

[ClariceStarling]

Honiton

B brave sweety and yes it's normal to b scared. Am here if u want to speak personally. Big hugs @ Loads of kisses! Xx

[francescahannah]

I want to echo what had been said that its normal to be scared at any cancer diagnosis. I was diagnosed with stage 2/3 ovarian cancer 10 years ago in June and I remember well the terror I felt but I'm still here although I have had recurrences and more treatment. My way of feeling more in control again was to read lots of books on how people had helped themselves and I recommend everything you need top know to help you beat cancer by Chris woollams. I have written a website from all my research at cancer self care.com

Love and hugs francesca x

[ANDE-Wales-UK]

Hi Honiton,

I totally understand your fear, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown before my op, its a natural reaction to whats happening to you, but today is my very last chemo after 18 weekly doses! LIke you at the start it seemed never ending, but despite the effects of being preciously poisoned for 18 weeks, I feel so well, so positive and looking forward to the rest of my life, the experience has made me stronger and I appreciate every part of my life now, there is light at the end of this journey.

I wish you luck with your treatment, I made every chemo a little day out! Lunch, picnics, quizzes it got me through it....today is gourmet breakfast! Final treat....

Stay strong and positive you'll be at the end before you know it, im here as all the ladies are if you have any questions or just need a rant!

Love and healing

Andrea x x

[Whippit]

Dear Honiton

I don't think you'd be 'normal' if you didn't have bad days. Hopefully you'll find a lot of support from friends here online who understand what it feels like to have this diagnosis. It can seem like too much information too soon. I found I could only take in and process a certain amount at any time and I did find some of the information given by health professionals rather gloomy when in fact I've found many positive things about living with cancer.

Paul's mentioned first line treatment. Some women qualify for a drug called Avastin with this combination so you might want to ask about that.

Let's hope the weather perks up soon. Everything seems so much better when there are blue skies and a bit of sunshine.

Keep posting and let us know how you're getting on.

Loads of love xxx Annie

[jennybutler]

Hello please try not to worry most of us have had the treatment you are going to have with great results, I was scared but talking to the girls on this site helps so much in what to expect, keep us informed on your progress all will be well so many new treatments in the pipe line don't read statistics most of us here beat them anyway.

Welcome from your friends on line xxx

[thesilent1]

hi and welcome to this site where you will find many helpful friends. I was diagnosed last June with stage 3b ovarian cancer. unlike you my surgery took place and was then followed up with 6 sessions of Carbo/Taxol. I won't lie to you, I found the side effects after the first two rounds of chemo hard to deal with but I phoned the oncology helpline at my hospital and they got me sorted with adequate pain relief etc. I had a few blips along the way with my white blood cell count which resulted in my chemo dose being reduced and this worried me however I got to the end of treatment in December and the follow up CT scan shows no sign of the disease so for the moment, great news! please take it one day at a time and don't expect too much from yourself. you will be tired, especially towards the end of your treatment but relax as much as you can. It is natural to be scared of the unknown. I worried about my surgery too but you know I got over it and recovered well from it prior to my treatment starting. the doctors and nurses are dealing with people like us every day of the week, they know

what they are doing and we have to have faith in them. certainly in my hospital, they were fantastic and I couldn't thank them enough. I am sure they will be the same in your hospital. sending you a big hug.

[thehusband]

Hi, when my wife was diagnosed back in late 2010 she felt exactly like you, but once she had the op and started her chemo she soon realised that whilst it isnt a 'walk in the park', the fear of not knowing what the op and chemo were going to be like.....was far worse than the actual experience of it.

This site holds many many experiences and without doubt there is always somebody there to 'speak to' and 'hold your hand' whenever you need it, that of course goes for your family as well. There are many posters on here that are carers and/or family members. Take care and good luck. Laurence

[honiton]

thankyou to you all,yesterday i felt every alone,like i was the only person in the world who had oc,thanks to all of you and my macmillan nurse who told me of your web site i feel a bit more in touch with myself today.I do wish our gps were more informed as to the early signs of oc .i was told nearly a year ago i was depressed and my bloated tummy and the need to pee all the time +constipation was due to stress,couldnt have been any further from the truth,again thankyou so much for your support xx

[drdu in reply to honiton]

That is poor that you were not diagnosed earlier. I say this as a retired GP and cancer patient - I have primary peritoneal cancer, a variant of ovarian cancer. I think mine should have been picked up 3 months earlier, but I blame myself as well, as I should have realised - you never think you are going to get cancer, but it happens.

Good luck with it all. The good thing is that you are getting started on treatment, and you should soon feel better. You will get lots of support on this website.

Lots of love,

Eileen xx

[coochy]

Hi

The girls on this site are fantastic if you ever need to ask anything you will always find someone who will answer you. You are allowed to have bad days its part of the journey. I found chemo really hard but not everyone does. Good luck

Elaine x

[Madz]

I started my OC journey in oct 2012 stage 4 advanced had surgery right away then 6 lots of chemo 5 weeks later and here I am enjoying life, working full time at my busy job, sorting out a new house that is more like a demolition job and knowing myself more than ever before. I'm not saying all these things to say hey look at me but to say there is good life with OC, it's scary will never leave me but that's ok cos I'm ok and today the sun is shining on both of us. Sending you lots of love Amanda x

[AnnieMae]

Hi Honiton, your treatment plan echo's what I had after being dx with 3c Ovarian cancer in August 2012. All you can do is take one day at a time. You will have good and bad days and go through many emotions and although (I hope) you have family/friends for support, you will feel no one knows what you are going through. That's where this site really comes into it's own. We ALL know exactly what you are going through, so 'talk' to us! I have found this site quite literally a 'lifeline' and I hope you will too. Best of luck with your treatment and I hope to 'talk' to you again soon.

Stay positive (it really works!)

Annette xxx

[Fitzy]

Hi Honiton. You are certainly not alone in your fear. I too was absolutely terrified. I was told about this site at the time (Sept 2009) but just couldn't face reading too much about it and was having a really bad time. Oh how I wish I had joined this site at the time! But so very glad that I did (in 2010). This site is a godsend, providing so much information and guidance and, above all, the understanding and support of a group of wonderful ladies who have been through a similar experience. As so many have said already, we are here to support each other. Good luck with your surgery and treatment.

Love and best wishes xxxxx Colette

[Solange]

It's completely normal. Seven years ago I felt exactly as you do. I didn't think that I could possibly be alive to see our seventh Grandchild born four months later - we now have another three gorgeous little ones. I was so shocked to be diagnosed with cancer - I felt it was something that happened to other people. Admittedly I am now waiting to start some more Chemo - but don't look at Statistics. There are always two figures quoted in percentages and you are just as likely to be in the best figure - as I obviously was.

Good Luck with the chemo - and remember that all the nasty side affects we are warned about are only "Chances" and we don't get them all. I often think we are told so much more than we need to know it frightens us more. Keep your chin up,

Love Solange

[fluffycloud]

Hi I have just caught up with the site as I have been away for a few days, and was curious to know if you are actually from Honiton, Devon as I am in Exeter. Pam

[honiton in reply to fluffycloud]

hi pam ,i lived in honiton for 12 years but moved back up south to crawley december 2012 to be nearer my children and grandchildren,called myself honiton because it reminds me of everything prior to oc this last year has been a bit of a nightmare but i do love being around children. Yvonne

[Hidden]

Hi Honiton. Am a bit late to this as I've been busy getting on with life after recovering extremely well from stage 3C ovarian cancer. Please, please try to stay calm. More information will emerge, and you will find that being armed with that gives you a start of feeling in control again. It's the scariest thing, isn't it, when it's just a rollercoaster you have no idea about, or when it will end. You will get through it, I promise, we all do somehow survive the shock of starting chemo and it sometimes becomes remarkably normal. You'll have a gazillion questions, let them spill here and I know we will all do our best to answer them. WRITE THEM DOWN too, and make sure you get the answers you need from your onc. Look forward to this: you will feel a lot better after the op too, the second lot seemed much easier to handle somehow and went much faster; I've heard that from a few other people too. Suddenly, you're on the other side. Not everyone gets completely through and clear, of course: I'm well aware I have been incredibly lucky, but you'd be amazed now resilient people are. Take inspiration from the wonderful women on here, keep talking and do NOT scare yourself with statistics. They are meaningless for a group of ONE, which is you.

Love

Sue xxx

[honiton]

hi wonkylegs silly question i know but did your hair come and if so how long after your first chemo did it happen,i have this vision of having my chemo thursday wake up bold on friday xx