Ocd: cant stop thinking a name or phrase - OCD Support

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Ocd: cant stop thinking a name or phrase

Reality259 profile image
20 Replies

Ok here it goes,Please any feedback would be helpful. So sence I was younger I had thoughts that if I didn’t do compulsions that my family would get cancer or die but without knowing it was ocd, I stopped and overcame that and it went away for years until i was 28.It came back but I quickly in a matter of 2 weeks stopped the compulsions and it went away.I did this without medication.Then I woke up with a name in my head that repeated and I couldn’t stop it.This time I seen a doctor and she prescribed me prozac.She told me it was an imbalance in my serotonin.I took this medication and my thoughts actually stopped repeating and I was happy with the medication.I then stopped the medication because I thought I was better.(Oops) well the thoughts came back and I suffered again until I took my Prozac as directed and the thoughts faded and I didn’t feel scared to think anything.Well I did something stupid again but I didn’t miss a dose of my meds.I needed a job and I used a detox drink to pass a drug test because I did smoke weed, and about two days later my ocd came back and I was scared to think of names again.I talked to my Doctor and she said the detox took out all my serotonin and I needed to wait until my meds worked threw my body.She says after they level out my mind won’t be like that anymore as long as I’m on my Prozac.So I’m in the middle of a waiting for my meds to work because I am suffering.My hands and feet are always clammy and of course feeling anxiety.Ive been using flooding exposure to the names or should I say intrusive thoughts.I know the sweating is part of the meds.I just feel like I’m going to be like this forever,even though I thought that before and got better.I need someone to help shed some light.I feel as the meds are starting to work again but my anxiety tells me otherwise.Sorry for the long post I just want you to see whats actually going on.My doctor says I will get better again I just need to meds to level out.Someone anyone please help

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20 Replies
Cellothere profile image
Cellothere

Hey reality - I just wanted to say you are not alone. I haven't had those type of things for years, but when I was a child I got the repeated words thing. It was like a mental tick. My sister could start it off (to wind me up) by repeating sounds and making them gradually louder, which was really horrible! She's a lovely person, but we were just kids obviously and she didn't know what she was doing! I would say that relaxing your body, remembering that it will be OK, it will get better, let the wave wash over you, stop trying to control the wave. It will be OK. Mine stopped when I gave up on trying to control them. It is hard to change your mind and that is when changing your body can be helpful...perhaps that is why you have been self medicating with MJ? It's going to be OK x

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toCellothere

Thank you so much for responding😀

Cellothere profile image
Cellothere

From reading on here I can see that the stuck words is quite a well documented phenomenon. So it is the OCD just kicking off. I hope you are in the UK, as it is sunny here and you can go outside and feel the sunshine on your face and smell the air and allow that to comfort you, because ti is just simple and nature offering us something positive. Oh I do sound like an old hippy today! :-))))

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toCellothere

Thank you so much for shedding some light

Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins

It's like a loop going round in your head, I know, because I've had it too! Better to lay off the weed as it can cause problems mentally. I know some people think it relaxing, but if you're prone to mental problems then it's probably best avoided.

Also better to leave detoxes alone. They're not necessary, as your liver and kidneys do the detox for you anyway, though I know you did it for a particular purpose. They're sold as a health benefit but they're either unnecessary or actually harmful.

The meds sound as though they suit you, and it will get better. It does take a few weeks and they're going to feel very slow, but once they kick in you should feel some relief.

If possible allow the words to loop in your head without neutralizing, though I admit I have trouble with this! They get fed up and go away if they're starved of attention.

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toSallyskins

Thank you for the insight

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toSallyskins

Yes I definitely stoped the weed.I rather have my sanity.

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toSallyskins

I feel a little better but I can’t seem to get my mind off of it.I truly got rid of it before just why I’m in this mess I feel I’m going to go crazy because I can’t think of anything else.I try to watch tv take my kids to the park and it’s just there.So it’s still ocd right?And the detox was only April 3rd because I checked my account and it said I bought it in the 2nd.It feels a lot longer.i still got to wait a bit.my doc says it will be a a while to see improvement.i remember when I was on my meds before it just faded and my mind could think of other things and I was great.I do have all the side effects that the medication is working.Dry mouth, tremors when I yawn,in my hands and legs.Ive seen a lot of bruising on my legs and clammy hands and feet.Dialeted pupils etc.Im only scared that my mind is stuck like this again.Which I thought that before and it did go away.Im just in this right now and need help from you and anyone else.God bless

Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins in reply toReality259

It sounds like OCD! It really should feel better once the meds have kicked in. They often do have side effects that wear off after a few weeks, but it does take about a month before you feel benefits rather than side effects.

The looping in your brain should subside, though I know from my own experience how upsetting it can be. Concentrating on anything else is difficult when your mind is over busy with unwanted thoughts, but if you can keep yourself occupied with things that don't require too much mental effort it may help. So household chores, cooking, a favourite book etc.

Don't be tempted to give up the meds once your mind has settled down. People are happy to take medication for a chemical imbalance in other parts of the body, and the brain isn't that much different, except for being more complicated!

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toSallyskins

I’m definitely staying on Prozac for the rest of my life.

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toReality259

I just want the thought loops to stop. My mind just keeps thinking don’t think of a name and bam!i should know what’s going on but my ocd tricks me.But I’ll definitely keep taking my meds.as long as it will go away and I can think of anything else,I can have the patience

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply toReality259

And it’s only been April 2nd when this happened but sence then I’ve been taking my meds

Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins in reply toReality259

It's less than a month, so give it a little longer. If it doesn't get better, then consider getting some CBT. This can help enormously, particularly if you are also taking meds. There's often a bit of a wait for treatment, but you can make a start with a self help book. I've found Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and The OCD Workbook helpful, but there are quite a few others.

The paradox is that trying not to think of something forces you to think of it! If possible, let the thoughts alone, not actively pushing them away but not giving them attention. It's quite a trick to learn, and I don't always get it right, but if you can manage it the looping subsides or stops.

Ulisse profile image
Ulisse

HI Reality

Medications can work on their own, but the suggested practice is to combine them with therapy - this is normaly CBT, or for a more modern approach, ACT.

ACT is Acceptance and Commitment. This means that the first thing for you to do is to start accepting the intrusive thoughts that come to mind. Just try to put with the anxiety that this may generate, but I found this method better than the traditional CBT.

Just learn to gradually and maybe very slowly at the beginning, accept the ideas that your brain generates. Even if you can do half a job and some of the ideas remain, dont worry. Time is the essence here. As you get used to acceptance, the thoughts and ideas will bring less anxiety because you fear them less and less.

Its a battle against fear , not the ideas as such. Somewhere in your psyche its possible you have incorrect or exagerated value for certain aspects of life and the fear or falling foul of the inner rules generates a fear that manifests itself more overtly in thoughts and ideas. (this is a theory I have constructed so I stand to be corrected by the more knowledgeable user base here).

Nevertheless, the need to diminish the fear thru acceptance is the way out of the control, that fear has currently over you. Keep taking the medication as your doctorm says.

Hope this helps.

Best wishes for Easter Sunday.

Max

Hang in there, I have tried over 67 combinations of meds, and I still feel like the way I felt while I was being tortured and neglected and abused by the people who were supposed to protect me. I have now been blessed with a gorgeous princess, who thinks the world of me ,and puts me before herself. This relationship and the combination of proper meds management along with my positive mental attitude should keep me from another episode of wanting to off myself. Johnny

Reality259 profile image
Reality259 in reply to

Hell yea... sometimes u feel like u can just end the mental torture but when u got something to live for it’s worth it in the end.

Right now I am taking 2mg ativan, that is not working hardly at all. Do you know of anything else other than meds that can help curb the pain of the repetition.

Reality259 profile image
Reality259

I’m taking Prozac 80 mg a day that makes it fade away for me.

I am taking prozac 20mg depakote 1000,seems depakote not working, will talk with dr about i,cre!se prozac.

PumpkinSpice_ profile image
PumpkinSpice_

Reality259, how are you doing now after more than a year? I'm experiencing something very similar to you.

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