No matter how busy I try to stay, that moment where I take that little 5 minute breather, that horrible dark feeling begins to sink in again! I just don’t get it and the feeling is also hard to completely explain. I’m scared in case this is all that there is to me for the rest of my life! What if it comes to a point where not even my children can keep me going?! Moments in the day I’ll feel excitement about my future but then there is other moments where I get this horrible dark feeling and I feel as though I don’t have a future and that there is nothing more for me to do on this earth! I know it’s a load of crap as I do still have my beautiful children to bring up but it’s just how I feel! I try to stay as positive as I can but sometimes it’s just not always possible unfortunately!
That Dark Cloud: No matter how busy I try to... - OCD Support
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That Dark Cloud
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Hi A_Peaceful_Mind
I feel like this all the time it's horrible. Sometimes I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I wake up with the not knowing what to day will bring! But there is help out there for all people who suffer. I start CBT again in a few months time it feels like a life time away but we have to tell are self it's the ocd making us like this! This isn't us. Good luck to you and best wishes x
Thank you so much. I’ll hopefully receive my CBT letter soon. Good luck to you with your CBT lovely. Xxx
Hi there,
I don’t have OCD but my 18-year-old son does, he was diagnosed late last year. I’ve only just read your original post about your background. I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been struggling with this for so long without feeling able to tell anyone. How incredibly tough that must have been for you - so one thing’s for sure, you’re a survivor and a very strong person. I want you to know there is hope - my son found a combo of CBT and ERP therapy extremely helpful, along with doing the mindfulness type exercises his therapist suggested for when the thoughts come. He has started University and moved into a hall of residence, and he says while the thoughts still come, and he has had the odd bad day, he is SO much better and happier and is able to throw himself into University life - something he (and we) had started to think he’d no longer be able to do. He has to stay on top of the meditation and get exercise etc and stay reasonably busy, but so far - touch wood - he is 100% better than he was four months ago. He’s not on this forum because I think he is a bit nervous about triggering his OCD by reading too much about other people’s experiences, but I know he found it helpful for knowing he wasn’t alone back when his OCD was still pretty bad. Anyway I hope this gives you some hope that it won’t necessarily be like this forever - lots of people find treatment solutions that work for them and mean they can lead full & happy lives, even if their OCD is never cured. You have totally done the right thing seeking help for it and hopefully now your trajectory will change. I really wish you all the very best and will watch your progress with interest 😊. Liz
Thank you so much for your post Liz! That amazing about your son. I’m sure that in a few months time I’ll be in a much better place like him. Xxx
Good to know that your son is doing so well!
Most of us on here will know how that feels. I can only congratulate you and other parents with OCD for being able to take such good care of your children in spite of OCD! That is an achievement in itself.
I have an 11 year old and he sees my struggles in dealing with the OCD.
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Intrusive thoughts
Please read my story
Ocd is taking over my life! 
Hiding contamination issues.