So scared!! : Hi please can someone help I’m... - OCD Support

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So scared!!

Vickylou30 profile image
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Hi please can someone help I’m really freaking out! So I was walking to the shop and all of a sudden imagined just running away! It actually felt like I was getting the urge to do it! But I really don’t want to go anywhere let alone run away from my home etc.... is this the ocd/anxiety please someone help I’m absolutely terrified!

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Vickylou30
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Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins

That's OCD! It makes you think you want to do things you don't want to, among other things. Often a sufferer will be convinced they are going to harm a child, cause an accident on purpose or some such thing, that they really would never do. So really, it's just the OCD making you think you would run away, when you wouldn't.

Just as children are safe with OCD sufferers who are afraid of harming a child, so your husband and home are safe from your running away. From all you have said, you have no reason to run away, so it is only the OCD making you think that.

Running away isn't that easy. It's not just a case of up sticks and you're gone. So a trip to the shop isn't going to lead to you not going home. If possible allow the thoughts to come and go, because they will go if you ignore them. I know how difficult that is, but the bottom line is that running away is something you don't want to do, and will not do.

Vickylou30 profile image
Vickylou30 in reply to Sallyskins

Thank you for your reply! I’m absolutely terrified of this anxiety I’m scared it’s going to make me want to run away if that makes sense? I’m terrified of getting the thoughts because I’m scared the more I get them the more chance to there is of it happening! But now I’m panicking about panicking too so searching for the thoughts.... sorry if I’m rambling it’s hard to explain sometimes. I just really wish there was something I could do so I could be certain it won’t happen?

Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins in reply to Vickylou30

As I said on a post to someone else, OCD demands certainty, even where certainty can't be had. But it sounds as though you have a strong marriage, and people don't just walk out of strong marriages, so you can be pretty sure you won't.

Try not to overthink. The more you go over and over something like this in your mind, the worse the doubts become. Not to worry about rambling, I get it! It's not easy to explain to somebody who hasn't experienced OCD but most of us on this site know only too well what it's like!

The thing is that OCD likes to attack us just where we care most: so for some sufferers it's their relationship with their partner, for others it could be their children, or other family members, their job etc, or it tells them they haven't switched off an appliance even though they know they have. It likes to place doubts where we should feel most secure, so in your case, you know you won't walk out of your partner, but OCD insists on saying, 'But maybe, what if you did?' And next thing, you believe it!

Exposure therapy might get you to imagine running away and the consequences of it. Perhaps best to do this with a therapist. But just remember that everyone has sudden inappropriate thoughts, suggesting that we do things we would never do, but it's only with OCD that anyone takes them seriously.

Do get a self help book such as Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which has things in it that are relevant to you. And try to get a referral to a therapist.

Vickylou30 profile image
Vickylou30 in reply to Sallyskins

Thank you so much! I’ve just ordered that book also and have messaged a therapist so just waiting for a reply now 😊 thank you again your advice really does help me to think more rationally about things

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