Hi all
I don't post very often but do read your posts. But today well finger are not as bad as they have been though you may have un ravel some of my words .
Not been to great of late , my neck and shoulder hurting ,my fingers more so on my right are swollen and and very painful , left hand just swollen . My back hurts a lot and my ankles keep giving way , my knees hurt and have shooting pains , walk further than the driveway of my flat and my hip hurts and leg swells very quickly and weighs a ton so other hip hurts , So with all this feeling very sorry for myself and with the nwer problems like my breathing ,really got me down and then the not sleeping for more than two hours at a time ,hving to keep gong t the loo , well got even lower . snd eith a few problems with myeldest daughter ...i was actually thinking all would be better without me , NHS would save a fortune .So went ot my doctor , not know him very well and think he not really want to know about me . But he was worried I was getting depressed .... see he good ...... offered counseling , there is a four to six month wait for this ..... so gave me higher dose of Amytipalene, which I hate as makes me so drowsy all day . I dont feel safe driving much these days and really would like to just be ble to get out to chat to people and see my grandkids as they not come here ..... and that really saddens me , and makes me low .. There is a whole story about that . and it hurt me very much ,,, anyway . my doc said to that maybe to keep me occupied is to volenter for something .
So went to the web site ,and looked and found there is nothing I can volenter for .....visit people ,mmm if not well can not drive , if in pain cn not move if back goes well pain and unable to walk ,sit for long , get sssoooooo tired when do anything that can not even do house work or ironing cos of hands .. talking on a phone ,,, great until throat oes and voice goes as throat affected by RA So considering what do I actually have to offer others , It has taken me nearly an hour to do this cos of neck shoulder and of course my fingers so time at my comp is limited . I would hate to say to someone yes I will do something only to wake up next day unsable to do anything thus letting them down.........But what got to me after this bit of reaserch is that my doctor does not really know anything about me at all. Does not know of the years of pain I have learned to cope with . And even wondered if he works for ATOS