Difficult times

[Pat13]

Hi. I know it’s such a difficult time right now for everyone but I’m really struggling. I was fortunate and had a very successful total knee replacement last December and am on the list for the other one to be done ASAP. My shoulders are so painful, my fingers and thumbs are driving me mad and I have numbness and pins and needles in my left arm and hand. It doesn’t help that I know I’m depressed because my special son died in January. I just need to let off steam so sorry for the moan but the pain of it all is just so unrelenting. Thank you for reading Pat xx

[Pippy25]

Hello Pat, thank you for posting and sending you a big virtual hug. It sounds like you have had an awful lot of significant and emotional events to contend with and in a short space of time and under normal circumstances it is hard enough, but in these strange times we are finding ourselves in it must feel overwhelming for you and being in pain too as you say feels unrelenting. So I am glad you have posted and let as much steam as you like off, as we are here. Do you have any support at home or are you on your own? Are you able to make contact with your GP, a health care professional or rheumy to explain how you feel? Please don't feel you can't contact them because of this virus. Again the NRAS have a helpline and they may be able to provide advice and support too. Please don't feel you are alone, take care and sending you my love and best wishes x

[Pat13 in reply to Pippy25]

Hi Pippy Thank you so much. I do have a husband but he is panicking about how I’ll I am anyway and is terrified about going out unless he brings the virus home, so I am trying to cover up how bad it is but other than that my next closest person is my granddaughter but she is also distraught at the loss of her dad so I don’t want to put on her either.

I just needed to write down what i am feeling. Thank you so much for listening xx

[Pippy25 in reply to Pat13]

Writing down your feelings is good but please consider getting some advice or support as I am saying this from personal experience. Is there anything you can do to reduce the stress of your husband going out, such as having things such as shopping or any meds delivered? Please remember to look after yourself too, as I know you don't want to feel like you are putting on your husband or granddaughter. I'm glad you felt able to reach out and post here. Keep strong and be kind to yourself, you matter. x

[Lyndy]

Sending love Pat ❤️

[Hidden]

I’m sorry Pat13 you really are having it hard. You off load when ever you want it is therapeutic and it’s easier as you don’t want to upset your family. Wish there was more I could do but listen but I hope this helps . Sending massive hugs 🤗 x

[patsymay13]

I just so feel for you with everything you are going through and want to send my best wishes to you xxxx

[Caza]

I’m so so sorry to hear of the death of your special son. Virtual hugs xx

[thelmar]

Sending virtual hugs xxx

[hatshepsut]

What a dreadful time you have been going through. Please don't hesitate to share how you're feeling, we have all needed help at some point, that's why we're here.

I do wish I could do more, but please believe me you're in my thoughts. Take care, come back whenever you want

Lots of love,M xx

[springcross]

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your son Pat and now you're having to contend with this pain. I hope you find the relief you need as this really brings you down. You're trying to cope with emotional and physical pain at the same time and that's very hard, your head must be spinning. There is some good advice here so maybe give your GP or Rheumy a call and ask for help. Thinking of you. x

[KittyJ]

Firstly never apologise for having a moan here, you let it all out, we don’t mind and can hopefully be a support to you whilst you are going through a tough time. I’m so sorry you have lost your special son and are feeling depressed and in pain. Please do speak to your doctor as they may be able to help you. Keep talking to us here whenever you need to. Sending you a big hug 🤗

[Eiram50]

Hi pat

Let off as much steam as you need to. Together, we can hold you here.

I am really sorry to hear of your sons passing, it must be an extremely difficult time for you and then pain and lockdown on top.

I hope that you are as well supported by family and friends if they’re around although appreciate that this is made harder by current restriction.

Can you call your GP for some advice with regards possible emotional support and pain relief?

I hope things begin to feel better for you soon, at least physically.

Please keep talking x

[sylvi]

Pat13 you moan all you like we have all been like that at some time or other and we are here to support one another when things are bad and good too.xxx

[MaryTH]

💖 xxx

[Pat13]

A big thank you to every one who replied to me. It has helped letting my feelings out. I will be back and if I can help someone else please let me know. xxx

[marigold54]

Never apologise for how you feel. You've had a lot to contend with lately. Hope your aches and pains will subside soon. It's bad enough feeling down because you're unwell but losing your son on top of it all must be unbearable. I hope you have many happy memories of your son that will keep you going until you're feeling stronger. In the meantime, moan and let off steam as much as you need. I'm new to the site but already had positive replies which have helped me. My thoughts are with you.

[Hidden]

Blimey Pat,

I'm not surprised you're not feeling on form, and it's always made worse when there's nobody on hand to talk things through and really understand how you're feeling, and to help you to take a step back (to take the weight off for a bit).

We are not as super human as we all try to make out and recognising it's okay to feel crap is okay.

Please try to be kind to yourself and become more selfish in asking loved ones to listen - I'm sure this will help.

And things can only get better!

Take care.

L

[Beth72]

💕💕xx