Ive suffered with depression for years, it started after I had my first child nearly 28 years ago.....oh wow, is it really that long! So anyway, its been getting worse over the last couple of years and I told my GP I needed to see someone about it. I cant explain to you the pain of going through this day after day. Anyway got to see someone yesterday and its not depression, its a cyclical mood disorder, similar to bi polar.
Its really upset me. I walked out of the surgery and wanted a cig. I mean really wanted one. The comfort of that one thing I knew. Ive wanted one ever since. I haven't had one but Ive been using my tank a lot since yesterday.
I feel as though Im a basket case! Hes given me a mood stabiliser, Im not on the full dose as I cant take the time off work and it will knock me silly, so hes going to build me up.
I think I need to read up on this as I feel lost and I want a cig.
I know smoking wont cure me but its my comfort blanket.
Puffer be aware I will be leaning on you!
9 Weeks Tonight! God help me get through tonight!