Holiday booked and too thin?

Hooray! booked flight to Mauritius for Easter. So added motivation to maintain my weight, if it was needed. Tried some of my summer stuff on and it is all a little loose. No bad thing in a hot climate, but am loo

king at buying sundresses and swimsuits in my new slim sizes and my favourite shop has great items in their sale. All good news!

BUT

I was enjoying compliments as I lost weight but lately people have been saying "I am worried about you, you are disappearing " etc.

I have been maintaining for several weeks, but as I have bought things in smaller sizes people seem to be noticing more and many comments are negative. I am not even below the middle of the healthy bmi range so I am definitely not underweight. I am happy with how I look and feel in myself.

I guess people just like to be critical. ...

Funny how we are hurt when people think we are overweight and just as hurt when they think we are too thin.....

I guess the lesson I can learn is just to be happy in myself.

22 Replies

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  • People will stop commenting soon enough, they may just be commenting on the change, but next time they'll comment that you just look well or something, as you'll still be the same. Enjoy the smaller sizes, and keep going with the challenge of maintaining. I'm at the upper end of my healthy BMI and people have also commented I look very slim now. It's just that I look different, I know I'm about 2.5 stone away from being underweight so there's nothing to worry about! I hope you can adapt to the way you see yourself though, the way you look in smaller sizes etc. Its got to be worth it after all this work, I bet you look ace and there's plenty of time to choose what you'll wear in Mauritius :)

  • I've had similar comments and I don't take any notice. I am right at the top end of healthy BMI and would have to lose 3 stones to be underweight. I don't know what causes these comments. I think some is down to jealousy.

    You carry on and don't let it bother you.

  • If you like how you are looking then that's what matters,

    People feel they have to comment be it positive or negative, what I have found in the past is these people are usually jealous of what you have achieved and wish they had the determination to do the same as you.

    So keep on sticking to your new you and buy loads more clothes to show yourself off

    NB

  • Thanks.... loving the new clothes. And enjoying looking slim. Just getting fed up with being asked if I am well and people saying that they worry I am too thin. I am not! Bmi 22.4. Perfectly normal!

  • You could try asking someone who didnt previously know you, what do they see?. For example, next time you are shopping and get chatting to a nice friendly assistant, ask her if she sees you as too thin! I bet she'll say you look great, just right!

  • I figure it's because people are so used to seeing you with more weight on like me. I've been over weight for yrs now and now that I am losing all the weight people are just going to have to get used to it. You have made such great and positive changes to your life and it hasn't been easy I'm sure. Embrace the changes and love who you are with all the added health benefits and extra yrs you have added onto your life. I know I would have added a lot of yrs on to my life with giving up smoking 2 yrs ago and losing almost 6 stones in weight with more to lose. Enjoy life enjoy your holiday, but most of all enjoy being you in your new and wonderful body. It's yours to be happy in :-)

  • Thanks and congratulations to you too... you rock!

  • Love the comments people have wrote ... My job is managing change and as humans it is one thing we are dreadful at coping with. Give them time and they will get used to the new you. Enjoy ... you wil probably look amazing being the healthier you!

  • I think with the obesity epidemic as a population our perspective has changed without us realising it, so someone mid healthy BMI range starts to look thin compared with what is considered to be "average", I read somewhere recently the average dress size for a woman is a 16, well I'm a 14 - 16 and two stone over my healthy range, so it might be average, but it's not necessarily healthy! You've done really well, and people will adjust as they get used to the slimmer version of you ☀️

  • I was going to comment something very similar to this. I think we've just got so used to everyone being bigger that we have a warped sense of what is a normal healthy weight. I lost a stone last year and felt fantastic but people started to criticise - I've now put half of it back on due simply to being greedy - and I know when I drop it again I'll get the negative comments again. But I will be right in the middle of my healthy bmi. It's irritating 😕

  • I think Fran182715 is spot on.

    If I ever see a group photo of people in the 1970s in the local paper (ie just ordinary people - WI ladies, bunch of school kids, Rotary chaps, etc) - I'm always struck by the collective thinness of the group. There might be a couple of people carrying a few extra pounds but on the whole everyone looks pretty skinny.

    Fast forward to the equivalent group shot today, and the boot's on the other foot, there might be a few people looking trim, but most are on the tubby side. That's probably also why I don't feel any fatter relative to the general population now than when I was a stone and a half lighter in 1988! And I'm still a size "14" allegedly too ....

    A further complication is that we're all very well informed about anorexia et al, and well-meaning people interpret "thinner you" as heading for that problem instead of your previous problem! They'll just have to get used to new you!

    And the new swimsuits thing sounds deeply enviable - well done - have a wonderful holiday!

  • It is always good to lose weight but it is not always easy however much you try, especially if you are older; I remember when I was a few years younger, I lost a stone real quick...but almost 10 years down the line, the body's metabolism does slow down and cannot burn up the stored fat as easily as when you are younger. So how about also mentioning your 'tender' age along with your successful drop in sizes too?

  • See my post missimum and see if it helps :)

    healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

  • 57

  • im sure people are just not used to seeing you slim

    also Mauritius is lovely! food is great too - fresh seafood!

  • Ignore them !! I had exactly the same response from one "good friend"!!!!

    It was all sour grapes and I continued a further haf stone to my target, which I have now maintained for six months. Like you, certainly not skinny my BMI is 23 , but slim enough to look and feel good.

    ( Ps funnily enough, that friend and I hardly see each other now, her loss!)

  • I think you are right to keep the healthy BMI range in mind, then you are unlikely to overdo it. Sometimes people genuinely don't realise how overweight we all are so a healthy weight then looks 'wrong'. Well done for becoming healthy and looking after yourself. Eat well and keep well.

  • Wow that certainly has made me think. I too have had comments about me disappearing by one close friend, even though.... I am STILL largely overweight. LOL. Ok I am not obese anymore but no where near skinny or healthy yet so it's even more surprising. And yes it is coming from the one friend who actually knows I am dieting. Bizarre. I do think she worries a little but it cannot be the only reasonas there isn't anything to worry about. I need to lose another stone and a half to reach the top end of my healthy range!

    Your post has prepared me to receive even more comments/criticism when I do reach my healthy range..... You're right the important is for us to be happy with oneself. wtg!

  • Salve! Well done 2beFabnfit. This may sound daft but depending on the tone of voice this can sometimes be intended as a compliment - wow, look at you, so much of you has disappeared!

    Have you lost all your weight really quickly? This may make people think you are ill and cause worry. Also, bear in mind your relationship to the people saying it. Grandmas and mothers will always find something to fret about when it comes to younger female relations. If it's from people who 'may have a few pounds to shift themselves' it is possibly veiled jealousy. Real friends should know better - they will be aware of how hard you've been working on your weight loss. If it's someone you think is worthy of a reply, next time they mention it tell them you're really pleased with your success and now you've reached a healthy weight you have no intention of losing any more. Say that now it's just a matter of weight maintenance to stay healthy and be pleased with the way you look.

    If that doesn't stop them, ditch them.

    Now just eat appropriately to achieve constancy in your weight, carry round little 'before' and 'after' photos for sneaky peeks to keep you proud of yourself and enjoy your new self on that holiday and beyond.

    Well done! We NHS Weight Loss groupies are all proud of, and pleased for you. Have found!

  • I'm staggered by your post and by the replies, I really thought I was the only one that had been actively discouraged from losing weight, told I'd gone too far etc, all the while only just being within my healthy weight range. I wish I hadn't listened to them now and maybe I wouldn't have regained all the weight and then some!

  • don't listen to them, you know how much you want to lose the weight and how hard its been. its all to easy to put it back on. Just make sure what you are eating is very balanced and do lots of exercise so you don't lose muscle. If you look at ultra fit people that's what they do, they don't eat any rubbish. enjoy being slim well done

  • I realise this post is old, but the post and replies are worth a read for those of us struggling to lose the last few pounds and who are likely to get those comments. I hear them every week.

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