8 weeks and struggling!: So I met with the midwife for... - NCT


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8 weeks and struggling!


So I met with the midwife for the first time today. She was really nice and I quite enjoyed being fussed over!! I'm at 8 weeks just now, and I'm struggling a lot. I have bad HG and struggling to get out my bed let alone go to work somedays. I managed my appointment today, manged a shift at work, cleaned house, made dinner for later, two loads of washing, walked the dog and did the horses but now feeling like death on the sofa! Feel like there is so much to do after I have a few bad days but as soon as I try to do anything I feel rubbish again! Still having severe pains in my stomach which midwife told me to watch, I am quite worried as they feel like the pains I had when I had my miscarriage but I think I'm just worrying. It sounds awful but I still don't feel happy. It dosent feel like any of this is real. I'm not happy or sad, just don't feel anything. And I feel like such a bad person because I shouldn't be feeling like this! It dosent help that my partner still isn't keen on having the baby as this year was going to be pretty hectic with things we had planned. I just don't know what to do. I am also supposed to be starting a new job soon! Everything is hitting me like a ton of bricks and don't feel I have anyone to speak to as I feel I'm being a burden!!

4 Replies

No Hun your not a burden, your very welcome here xx

One thing I have learnt is to pace myself with housework and things that need to be done, I do a little bit everyday, there is no rush!

I was like you had bad days so didn't do anything thing when I felt better I did soo much I felt I'll again. Not good.

I understand how you feel not happy not sad, for me it was because I had a miscarriage as was so scared I would miscarry again, thank god I'm coming up to 32 weeks, have had. Bit to deal with severe sickness from 13-21 weeks, anaemia and gestational diabetes plus spd and carpel tunnel syndrome in my wrists so painful. But even though I'm going through this I'm so happy I will see my boy soon can't wait x

Regarding the pains up need to slow down listen to our body, the second half of the second trimester has been much better than the first trimester :)

Your partner I hope is supporting you regardless how he feels, takes two to make a baby :)

Take care xxxx


Your doing too much u have listen to ur body and take it easy. . Ur body is developing anther little body and takes it out of u.. Don't be too hard on ur self the other half will come round. ..I felt exactly the same as u but trying to relax and enjoy it now... It takes time to get ur head as round it all. .I still have days where I get overwhelmed with it all... bloody hormones don't help! Keep smiling xx

Hi this site is really good for getting things out in the open and making your feeling heard even if it is to complete strangers there are some lovely people here to talk to who quiet often are going through the same thing so your defo not been a burden. I was in a similar position when I first found out I wasn't over joyed and I wasn't devastated my partner neither we havent been together long although been great friends for 15years it was a new relationship we both have a daughter each from a previous relationship and I always said after the difficulty I had with my first pregnancy I didn't want anymore... then boom it hits that I'm pregnant the first 12 weeks are always the hardest with changing body and hormones, tiredness sickness and generally feeling crap but it does get easier. Once we seen our baby at our scan it was amazing and the feelings crept in the further on I get the better I feel and it becomes exciting I'm 23 weeks now and love it. Plans can stay plans there is nothing you can't do with a baby that you can do without it just takes that bit longer that's all everything takes time. Sounds like you need to take time out for yourself too, do little bits of housework when you can and what you can't manage will have to wait don't over do it, listen to your body and others around you specially if your getting pains, make sure you eat well and often enough I am a nightmare myself for skipping meals but its important not only for the baby but to keep your energy levels up to. Also if you live with your partner then ask him for bit more help sounds like you do a lot on your own!

If ever you need to talk im always here as well as many others on here. Take care and good luck. Xx

Hi, i felt exactly the same as you. at 8 weeks i was admitted to hospital with severe HG. low and behold i spent the next 4 weeks there. i didnt feel happy or sad. i felt numb. it just didnt feel real.

so your not alone. i didnt even have good days where i could get to work or do any cooking. smells and visions made me sick and any motion. i couldnt sleep on my bed i had to sleep on floor as mattress movement was horrible.

it does get better. im 22weeks and since leaving hospital was on steroids to stop sickness. (or at least keep it at bay) but ive since had to come off them due to the baby being at risk of diabetes. if you start to feel dehydrated at all go to hospital. you need the fluids in you. it keeps you going. your baby will survive on your reserve. dont let it get bad as i did. i ended up with a tube down my nose in to my bowel just to keep it working. :(

dont give up. i know at the moment its hard but as soon as you feel a little better it will become real. my sickness is still around- but i am looking forward to my little boy arriving. xx

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