Pariah

[Fattius]

You bastard!!! I'm up. I hate it when you assume I have this insatiable appetite for the fire you've set in my very core. Why do you hate sleep? And furthermore, you can release your serrated electrified talons that are pulling my face into the earth. You keep my in a drunken stupor , although I haven't touched a drop. You slump over my shoulders while I'm left meandering, perhaps into a wall or corner. You've got me, you have your pariah!!!

[jimeka]

Fattius i am sorry that you feel so strongly. Ms pulls you down, sometimes there are days when you feel that you don’t want to get up again. I know, I have just had one of those nights, reaching for the pills, hoping they will last alittle longer, pain surging through my head. BUT, I have my ms family on here that I knows understands, so please don’t ever feel lost or alone. Keep fighting and tell us how you feel. You are in my thoughts and prayers, blessings Jimeka 🤗

[Fancy1959]

Fattius, it's Fancy1959. Hate is probably strongest and those draining emotion that you can feel. It takes so much energy to hate that it drains your body.of the much needed energy it needs in order to productively fight off this monster with live with.

I know how hard it is to be a victim of MS but if you can stay positive instead of staying so negative you will realize that you are feeling better, you are much more resilient in this fight, and your general mood will improve greatly. You might go back and read my post I just made in the last few days about moods. Realize that you are very angry about having MS and you are morning what you have lost. Being so angry and so hateful about having MS is only draining your body and your mind of the much-needed energy you need to truly fight off this monster. Remember to keep your glass half-full not completely empty.

And this next one is going to be extremely hard for you but realize how lucky we are to have MS. With Ms we do have a future, it may not be at the future we envisioned even a few years ago but none the less it is there. I had two sister-in-laws. My first sister-in-law was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer about 10 years ago. We lost her less than a year after she was diagnosed. My second sister in law was diagnosed with breast cancer about 7 years ago. We lost her about a year-and-a-half after she was diagnosed. Looking back at this and I remember the grief I felt as I watched them decline and eventually pass on, Now, I do indeed feel lucky to have MS. They were both way too young to leave this world.

I've been fighting this monster for over 20 years and I'm still here putting up a good fight by staying positive, (on most days!) I will see my son's marry and I will get to know my grandbabies, spoil them rotten, and then send them back home to my sons! LOL! I wish I could do more but know I am here if you need to vent more or if you want to talk. Thinking about you today and praying your pain is more manageable. Fancy.

[Jesmcd2 CommunityAmbassador]

Well, arnt you a golden Ray of Sunshine this morning Fattius 😒 although that is really well written!☺️

There are days I 'hate' it too!😡 Although I firmly believe that that hate is a wasted energy! But seriously I get sick of it to! It hurts! And rainy days like today? Just make it worse!

And fall is coming 😭

I hope you get some rest today!

🤗💕

J🌠

[greaterexp]

I’m sorry life is so rough. Venting here, where people understand, helps a bit, I hope.

Please let us know how you’re doing.