I’m more than MS: Advice on how to handle... - My MSAA Community

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I’m more than MS

tenessa24 profile image
8 Replies

Advice on how to handle the constant, sympathetic looks and comments about my health. Don’t get me wrong, I have an army of support and I am grateful for each and every one. However, just like only talking shop when you’ve punched out is redundant. I am more than a healthcare marvel, ya know?

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tenessa24 profile image
tenessa24
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8 Replies
Jesmcd2 profile image
Jesmcd2CommunityAmbassador

Get really good at changing the subject, tenessa24 , or just ignore them, eventually they will get the hint. 😊

Orrrrrr you do what I do, and just talk about it so much they get sick of listening to it! 🤣😅🤣😅

Good luck and let me know what works for you! 😊🙃

J🌠

greaterexp profile image
greaterexp

I try to remember that people are usually well-meaning. I know I personally don't always have the "right" response in any social situation, especially since we are all so different. What may be comforting to one is offensive to someone else! So it helps to cut people a little slack. I like Jesmcd2's suggestion to gently change the subject and talk about my blessings instead.

Royjr profile image
Royjr

I think some people don’t know what to say or how to say it, so to be on the safe side they try to have a conversation about something easy and comfortable like work. I make it a point not to talk about work when I’m off or away and if the conversation start to lean that way I change the subject or walk away (politely of course 😀).

ssdw1958 profile image
ssdw1958 in reply toRoyjr

I like what you do to change the subject. It’s kind of hard to walk away when your are in a wheelchair. So I usually try to get the person I’m with to move me away

But really when your in a wheelchair you just get people looking at you like you have a contagious disease it’s very unsettling.

I’ll tell you sometime I would just rather stay home.

Fancy1959 profile image
Fancy1959

Welcome tenessa24, from Fancy1959. I spoke to so many people over the weekend I don't remember to speaking to you! So I want to officially welcome you to this awesome chat room. We're glad you found us. No matter how hard we try people will never change. Just because we look good on the outside most times they assume we feel good on the inside. I guess when were sick with Ms were not allowed to pull yourself together and simply make an effort to look good. You're running into the opposite annoying habit of many people and that is that they treat us like we're a total crippled invalid. I think they're attitude toward you will change as you show off your persistence and management of your MS. With me it becomes a mission to show people that what I do daily has changed, but I still do it my way.

Continue to attack your Ms and not give in. Continue to do your daily living chore so to speak as much as you can the exact same way you did but perhaps slower and you will show the individuals that you are more than your MS. That's the best advice I can give. When they try to do things for you say I've got it, sorry no thanks. One of the best tidbits of advice I came up with was from my nephew who is up paraplegic. He had some great, undisputable piece of advice that he taught me and I passed it along in the chat room. For ladies simply find best-looking man around and ask him for assistance. For all the guys out there find the best-looking lady around and ask her for assistance. If we need to ask for assistance we might as well enjoy the scenery! LOL! See sometimes our MS can provide excellent benefits! Haha. It has worked for me and I've shared it often and had many people laugh out loud about my techniques of enjoying MS when I get the opportunity!😄😉🙄 Fancy!

CloverPrincess profile image
CloverPrincess

Awww that’s awful! You should let them know that you feel uncomfortable and you’re more than any mere illness and to talk about hobbies, sports, church, or politics instead !

You sound like a fun person 🤗

tenessa24 profile image
tenessa24 in reply toCloverPrincess

Right? It’s just a huge downer to have focus on my health rather than just being with friends and family. And you’re right, I’m a riot!!!!!😜

Babslover profile image
Babslover

Hi tenessa24 I’m babslover , I have to agree with fancy1959, you need to be in a wheelchair but you still have your likes and dislikes. Ask for help from a good looking guy or a guy with a sense of humor ☺️ Laughing is a great medication. You sound like a riot. Welcome to the group 🤪

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