Being a productive member of society has been the ultimate trial! After several attempts to rejoin the work force and obtain gainful employment have been unsuccessful, I'm left with this vacuum of hate and confusion! Morbid thoughts and self doubt have plagued my very existence. Autism, cancer, sexual abuse, mass shootings, etc, are real problems problems that seem to dwarf my own. MS has taken my life and happiness and by proximity taken this from the ones I care about. Depression has lead me to an almost total reclusive state! Anger encompasses my every waking moment. My interactions are few and memory loss has spun my world upside down. Arguments with myself only add to my frustration! Loving life is what I was good at only to be replaced by hate. They choose not to see me for what I was, only what they feel I should be! Crazy is what im called, so this is what I've become!!!!!!