Hi to all! A question about ERP

[PinkOtter]

Hi, Has anyone here been through ERP therapy? I have and am now out of residential therapy and I'm having doubts about whether or not ERP and especially leaning into uncertainty is actually wrong. I deal with scrupulosity, fyi. Has anyone had any similar experiences? Thanks!

[Sallyskins]

Not at all - ERP is about learning to behave normally, and not torment yourself! Scrupulosity appears to be trying to sabotage your recovery. There's nothing immoral or wrong about having - and accepting - doubt.

[deValentin]

OCD is often called the “doubting disease”, so it’s normal to question the validity of ERP, for instance. You won’t be able to eliminate all uncertainties. It’s possible one may be wrong in labelling intrusive thoughts or urges as OCD. Dismissing OCD thoughts may make you miss a chance to solve the problem that’s currently tormenting you. That's the reality of things.

So, how do you decide whether to dismiss an intrusive thought or give in to the search for absolute comfort or certainty? Personally, what I did is to tell myself, “It’s okay to give in to my ceaseless search for perfection or complete certainty provided that it’s also okay if I don’t get the peace of mind I’m looking for”. As soon as I set that condition, the urge to do compulsions or ruminations starts to weaken because what makes it so strong is the belief I can satisfy it with impunity.

It's like with people suffering from bulimia. They are okay with eating large amounts of food in a short amount of time provided they won’t have to face the negative consequences of their behavior, in that case, gaining weight. If they tell their urge to overeat and their subconscious mind (the source of their urges), “I’ll satisfy you as long as you don’t make me feel bad afterwards and pressure me to use unnatural ways to lose weight; I won’t put up with those conflicting demands”, it will gradually lose its strength. One needs to be firm with one’s urges and require they accept the constraints of reality, whatever the future holds, if one wishes to control them reasonably well. It’s at least my experience.