Every Friday night my wife and I go to the chippy for tea. But this Friday I went on my own for our Normal order of pie and chips.
But this time there were no pies. I wasn't sure what to do, the stress of deciding even more as I had no phone.
The impatient chip server asked politely “you made your mind up fella”. I sheepishly replied, “I’ll chance it with two lots of battered sausages and chips please “.
Nervously I entered our house. The wife sat ready at the nicely laid out table, knife and fork at the ready. “I’m so looking forward to pie and chips,” she said. “Well, I’m really sorry, they had no pies so I bought battered sausages instead”.
Well, you wouldn’t believe the reaction. She went ballistic, chucked the sausages to the far end of the room and I narrowly avoided a flying plate. Then I was gobsmacked about what she said next.
“You know I hate battered sausages, I’m divorcing you” she screamed and then went to bed. I slept downstairs. When I say slept, I was basically staring at the ceiling all night dreading what the morning would bring.
At 8 am prompt, I could hear footsteps down the stairs. In she same came , smiling and whistling.
“Are you ok ?” I said nervously. “Yes of course. I’m ok and forgive you” she replied “I’ll never divorce you, marriage is for life… for batter or wurst”
I'll get my coat......