Dear God, I will sell my soul to cure the migraines..

[Claudeminh]

Hello migraine fellow victims,

How are we all going? Im trying to do post graduate university with chronic migraine and doing 2 casual jobs. It pretty much sucks. My life is a royal mess I think. Anyway, I was thinking of all the things I would do to stop having migraines. Im 46 now and the migraines really kicked in just before 45 after a severe viral meningitis disease. But the first year of recovery I was exhausted and had lots of nerve pain but not migraines. Then they started, and they roared permanently for 200 or so days. Then I had a day off. It was a revelation. Then back into hospital for 15 days for codeine overuse rebound headache. Now in round 2 of botox. 14 straight days of migraine. Now 2 days off??? Could the botox be working???? Dont know yet. What I do know is that my first university assignment is overdue cause of the 14 days of deformed hell and Im just moaning to myself...''oh god three months of university is ahead of me.......' Honestly I wonder how any of us survive at all, let alone actually DO ANYTHING.

How do we do it? Its incredible that we can even type on this blog. Its incredible we can turn the kettle on and have a piece of toast. Blow wave our hair. Speak to anyone. Go outside the door. We are incredible. I think we all should get medals and sporting trophies. You know, a gold trophy that says 'best and fairest' 351 days of chronic migraine and only said 'fuck' 17 times. " Good on us.

For all us females out there, quite a few have reported improvement after menopause, and hormone related migraines. Im tellin you now ladies, if I thought for 2 seconds menopause would remove this migraine blight from my life,....I would ride my PUSHBIKE to emergency right now and throw myself at triage screaming' Rip it all out!! Get rid of it now! I dont need a special room, just rip it out here in hallway and fuck the anaesthetic...gimme the scalple...Ill start!!!"

There is nothing I wouldnt consider. Not sure how everyone else feels. I would have a frontal lobotomy if that guaranteed no migraines, auction my left kidney, donate an arm for a transplant, sell my firstborn.....ok not sell my first born, but you get the picture.

I would willingly sacrifice a semi vital organ and have reduced life span to be free of these migraines. I would auction 35 years of life for 20 migraine free ones and hang the consequences. I would go live in the desert or Antarctica or worse....the Western suburbs if it meant no migraines. I would give up my worldly ambitions, meditate every day all day, ride a camel and eat capscicum if thats what it takes. I would convert to scientology, communicate via pictographs, wear hessian and don sackloth. I would volunteer to live on Mars with an aardvark and eat baked beans for the next millenia if I could be free of migraines. I would sell everything, live in a cave and breed scorpions. Actually I like scorpions so that one doesnt count.

I would volunteer for neural altering peptides in the sting of a scorpion or the fangs of a venoumous snake if it would cure migraines. I would be a human guinea pig for weird medicine trials. Oh why not, it cant get much worse unless you die of migraines. Seriously...I am desperate.

I really think we should all get together and have a medal giving ceremony for those valiant folk who have fought, lived and survived the great Migraine Plague of 2015. We could have gold trophies in the shape of brains. Wow.

What do you think?

Kindest regards to you all,

Rowena

[babs1234]

I'm with you. Good luck with your Botox. Have you tried accupunture ( Taiwanese). Oh and always use your mobile on loud speaker when possible. Don't hold it near your head. And sky dish as far from your bedroom as poss. This was what my accupunturist told me. Tv's off standby anything that needs a signal not good for migraners. He won't have a microwave in the house. So hon I think we'd be better off in that cave xxxxx

[Frodo]

I agree! I've often thought I deserve a medal or special award, rather than the sneering dismissal so often received from Doctors ("it's just migraine, take a pain killer" - true) and non-migraineurs (think one is a weak person who cannot deal with a little stress).

I really, really wish they could experience what we experience. If this sounds bitter and vengeful - it is!

[Exmachina in reply to Frodo]

Yes if we could transfer our pain to them just for an hour or two they would be more compassionate

[Exmachina]

Wow I love you! You put into words exactly how I feel. I say all the time I would sell my soul for no migraines. To bad I don't believe in heaven or hell. your post made me laugh and I am having a fucking migraine as we speak. Thanks for the laugh

[Claudeminh in reply to Exmachina]

Oh good, Glad you found it funny. Life is funny , in between being really fucked and an endless supply of humiliations.

[Claudeminh]

Hi everyone, ahh the fun continues doesnt it. Its March 2016 and its STILL GOING. We need more than a gold trophy. We need a brain transplant and  a lifes time supply of triple grade morphine.

[Cally01]

Thank you Rowena 😂😂😂😂 i actually can still belly laugh 😂. Oh how you nailed it 😂.

Damn right!! Wee should all get medals!! If one more stupid person tells me they have a migraine when it's simply a bloody headache I'll scream!! How can you have a migraine and still do your shopping/ go clubbing and have anything that resembles a normal life? NO CLUE!!!

I pray for my neurologist to have multiple migraines just for 30 days!! In a row, maybe they'll take the condition more seriously considering he's a specialist in something he's never once had!!!!

Thank god wee have a sense of humour my friends can't understand why I'm not rocking back and forth in the corner having suffered 18 months of multiple daily migraines!!

Keep fighting friends we've come this far!!

Cally 😘

[Claudeminh]

Yep im not leaving without a fight. But, I know that I will have to lay the boxing gloves down soon if it I cant win against the full time work thing. If thats how the cookie crumbles, then Im just going to devote my life to art, animals, peace, meditation and gardening and forgot the job thing. I will live on less, as I already have been and not worry about all that shite anymore. Im just giving it one last red hot go and then Im gunna give up and put my considerable determination towards enlightenment.  Im glad you are still here and ploughing on, even without great resolution of the pain. Hang inthere