Delayed Ejaculation

[Vintage67]

Hello all, I cannot ejaculate during normal sex but can through masturbation. I may have conditioned masturbation, so urgently looking for help please as my partner and I are at a critical age and desperate to have children. Thanks in advance.

[Hidden]

Have you consulted a doctor? That might be sensible.

[Vintage67 in reply to Hidden]

Yes of course. There don't seem to be any conventional methods for treating this disorder or drugs. I'm currently seeing an acupuncturist and reading some literature about conditioning problems.

[Hidden in reply to Vintage67]

That presumes that conditioning is the problem. Most people have no problems in doing both.

[Vintage67]

No, not assuming conditioning is the problem, just one possible cause amongst a whole host of possible reasons both physical and psychological.

[Vintage67]

After climaxing through masturbation I then try to quickly enter my partner that way, but it doesn't seem shall we say the most efficient way of getting sperm into her, but thank you as time is in short supply and you have got me reading up on methods such as intrauterine insemination which I think can help us as my issue may take too long to cure for my partner to get pregnant.

[Hidden in reply to Vintage67]

There are ways to conceive a child if you are not capable of doing it the conventional way. Have you tried a fertility clinic?

[Vintage67]

Yes we have already tried IVF and it didn't work unfortunately.

[Bramabull in reply to Vintage67]

If IVF did not work then I am not so sure normal ejaculation would work. IVF is about the closest they can get the sperm to inseminate. I think you just got to keep trying. I know of people who tried more than 10 time with frozen eggs and finally got twins.

[Vintage67 in reply to Bramabull]

I agree thanks Bramabull IVF has to be the most likely way, but my partner doesn't want to go through the stress of it again. The chances are slim as my partner is 48 and ofc her eggs aren't in the best condition at that age, but she doesn't want donor eggs either. Will try whist there's still hope, but it's a long shot indeed.

[Bramabull in reply to Vintage67]

Understand. It’s not easy to go through the hormone cycle and then the disappointment if there is no success. I am sure you guys may have discussed about adoption. There are a number of orphaned children (even babies) that you may want to consider adopting. Children bring joy regardless of their “source” of birth. In my view if you have the capacity, but not the fortunate to have your own, consider bringing joy and love to a unfortunate soul without parents and support in this world. Alas this is a big decision and both of you have to be comfortable. I wish you all the best bro!

[Vintage67 in reply to Bramabull]

Thanks. My partner at this stage still wants her own biological children, donor eggs/adoption may be an option to consider for the future.

[Vintage67]

Have read some great articles on NoFap and 'rebooting' seems to have helped many men regain normal sensitivity.

[jimfromcalif]

What is your age? Are you circumcised?

[Vintage67]

I'm 53 and no I'm not circumcised.

[nohopeleft in reply to Vintage67]

If you still have a foreskin it's unlikely it's due to desensitizing of the nerves, uniess you have a particulary rough style of masturbating. If that's the case try not to for a few weeks/months.

[sinombre]

I wonder if it's possible, and not sure if you already tried, but:

* could you masturbate until near climax then penetrate your partner to reach the climax? Or would the penetration just kill your "near climax"? Although maybe it's hard to stop at near climax.

* could you partially penetrate your partner then masturbate the (your) parts outside of your partner to try and climax? Since the head is already inside, that maximizes sperm transmission and minimizes loss.

* maybe try an alternating cycle of masturbating and penetrating your partner, from switching between the two, under the right rhythm maybe you can climax at the right time while inside her.

These might be awkward scenarios to do and for your partner but just some thoughts for things to try, while finding the proper resolution.

[Vintage67 in reply to sinombre]

Thanks Sinombre for suggestions. Yes have tried similar combinations, but as you say with masturbation once getting to near climax I can't hold back and if I get inside before reaching climax then I cannot reach climax again. I'm trying a programme of abstinence to hopefully increase my sensitivity so there's more chance things can happen the natural way.

[nohopeleft]

Are you by any chance circumsized?

[Vintage67 in reply to nohopeleft]

No

[GreenBaffoon]

I have this same issue. I'm circumcised and 26. I don't understand all this either tbh. I had the op like 2 years or so ago. There's definitely sensitivity when women give oral, boy it's actually soo sensitive I've never known anything like it 🤣. But I too can't get to the stage of Cumming. I mistreated far more than having sex, so maybe my penis is so used to how I masturbate that both that and my brain can't make me climax because a hand isn't being used in a certain way (my masturbation way)? Let me know if you find any answers. I'm sorry I couldn't give an actual answer I just wanted to say I'm having the same issue.

Other problem is women will start to think it's their fault, not mine.. I hate the fact they may start to hate themselves because I can't ejaculate well, or at all, when inside them but can when masturbating..

[Vintage67 in reply to GreenBaffoon]

Yes I feel you. My partner thinks I mustn't find her attractive, which is not the case at all. I'm just staying off the masturbation, it's early days, but am starting to feel some sensitivity returning. Maybe this can help, forum.nofap.com/index.php?t...