residential care complaints : my son is 21yrs old He... - Mencap

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residential care complaints

Pennypenny198 profile image
9 Replies

my son is 21yrs old

He is none verbal but can say yes and swipe his hand for no he has CP visually impaired peg fed in pads can’t walk or stand wheelchair user. Has dislocated hips

Below knee amputation. Can only use one arm due to stroke . I’ve reported a couple of incidents to manager that nothings been done

Shaving under his arm pit’s causing him to scratch plung feeding him leaving him sat strapped into seat for too long denied a prescription for pain relief because she doesn’t agree with me speaking with dr I’m is mum

Offering him paracetamol instead that’s not helping his pain in hips.

I’ve said all I’m doing is what best for my sons interest

It’s like I’m battling with her for his basic needs.

Can anyone hep it was the hardest decision for me to make for him to go there in the first place.

I go and see him every other night as he’s at college but that ends in July so he’ll be at residential all day then .

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9 Replies
Pogul44 profile image
Pogul44

Hello Penny,

I'm sorry to hear you're having such difficulties. It becomes so stressful when you try to raise a concern but are not heard.

My brother lacks capacity and lives in a residential care home and we have had similar problems over a long period of time so I understand your concerns.

Unfortunately as your son is 21 years old he is considered an adult and you no longer have the parental authority you had before he turned 18. However, please don't be disheartened as there are still things you can do.

Although your son is nonverbal it sounds like he has capacity so is able to make his own decisions. Is this correct?

Does he live in a residential care home or supported living?

I would recommend you write down your/his concerns in a non-combative way and email them to the manager asking the reasons why they are not addressing these concerns effectively. If you are able to write this with your son better still as it gives him a voice.

Do you/he consider that the actions of the manager are causing him harm? Perhaps a dumb question but important to establish. If yes, then, failing a reasonable response from the manager, you can contact the Safeguarding team of his local authority.

If you can address concerns directly and in a "working with you" kind of way it can help the immediate situation. If the situation does not improve having a written record will help if you need to escalate in future.

There is more you can do but these are first steps.

Best of luck to you both.

Pennypenny198 profile image
Pennypenny198 in reply toPogul44

Hi

Thank you for your advice really appreciate it.

My son is not able to do anything for himself.

So I’m his voice and his mum

This all started when I complained about his sling for his hoisting.

I may have to get a safeguarding for him.

Thank you

Steve__ profile image
Steve__

Sounds difficult, sorry to hear that. Is the person who is not listening to you the care home manager? Care home managers can listen better to social workers, who are basically paying the care home bills. Good luck.

Pennypenny198 profile image
Pennypenny198 in reply toSteve__

Hi Steve

Thank you for your advice

Yes she’s manager in office a lot of the time.

We’ve had 3 meetings already

Nothing has happened

His placement is part funded by social services

It’s private he got it through having respite at a hospice property was gifted for six you adults to reside there. It’s open 2yrs

I’m thinking would it be beneficial to speak with health watch.

I feel as though theirs no reasoning or it just seems as though it’s not about my sons welfare.

Their is also another parent with concerns too for her son

She was stressed and worried about her sons basic needs not being met

Thank you

Pogul44 profile image
Pogul44 in reply toPennypenny198

It sounds as though matters have gone beyond initial concerns so perhaps it's time to raise a Safeguarding concern.

My brother is covered by Surrey and the following is a link to their Safeguarding team info, what it is, etc.

surreycc.gov.uk/adults/care...

Your sons council may be different and if you raised a concern it would have to be done via his own council but you can read the above to find out what it's about, what constitutes a Safeguarding concern and how to report it.

Just enter the council name and Safeguarding adults team in your browser and you should find it.

Info from Mencap on Safeguarding adults here:

mencap.org.uk/help-and-advi...

For completeness the following link covers NHS Safeguarding:

england.nhs.uk/safeguarding...

You can report a concern with CQC also They won't be able to deal with your particular concern but the more reporting of bad service the better care homes will be and the more protection our loved ones will receive. CQC link below:

cqc.org.uk/contact-us/how-c...

Social Services should be concerned about care your son receives too and not only because they are part funding his care. The problem is trying to get hold of the right team. Perhaps you can do a browser search for social services and email them. They can point you in the right direction if necessary.

From experience my advice would be to contact as many people as possible to get something done on this. It shouldn't have to be this way but unfortunately it seems to be.

Please let us know how you get on and ask as many questions here as you like and don't lose hope.

Take care.

LaVerite profile image
LaVerite

A sad story Penny but I'm sure not uncommon as far as our own experience with our adult relative in residential care with limited capacity is concerned. What we know is in our relative's 'best interest' is far removed from what those who are paid to look after their 'clients' definition of 'best interests' are, and that includes social workers - all of whom (doctors, chiropodists, hairdressers) are all on the same side and will back up each others lies in order to maintain appearances and fool CQC ito giving them a good report. Their bottom lime is profit. The care staff are the ones that truly care but have little say, as speaking out damages their careers - as we know from speaking to former staff.

I think you need to be very careful about what and how you express your concerns to the manager and the snivelling authorities because as soon as it seems that you are questioning (in their eyes this means 'finding fault') the service they are providing, they will do what they can to squash you - and in our case take us to court at great cost.

Make sure you come across as a compliant ally; make your requests politely and deferentially (a little flattery goes a long way with these types); do not react to any criticism (justified or not) levelled at you. Keep your friends/relatives close and your enemies closer etc.

Remember care home managers are answerable to the care home owners who are raking in taxpayers/ratepayers money, and the less interference from relatives, and the more cash from the government heading their way, the better.

And the council wonder why they are going bankrupt!

I wish you well 🙏

Pennypenny198 profile image
Pennypenny198 in reply toLaVerite

Thank you so much for you’re advice a lot of this rings true appreciate it

Thank again

redoninon profile image
redoninon

Hi this happened to my son you need to tell everyone you can think of if the social workers not doing any thing tell the social workers manager,tell the manager of the placement hes in i would even tell the police if they are shaving him thats abuse and all the other things thats abuse to they shaved my sons whole body private parts to thats abuse they took my son out of there straight away its not allowed tell the police other wise the social services wont listen.take pictures also as eviidence..get him out of there please.,my son has now got a good social worker and helped get him a nice placement now.they had a emergancey meeting to get my son out but only because the police was called.please get him out of there i know how your feeling if your not happy listen to your instincts get him a better place and dont take no for an answer.

Nanopop profile image
Nanopop

Hello, you are not on your own with this/these problems. I had to take my son out of supported housing because of problems with physical abuse, neglect ,attitude of carers/ect. He has now been living with me for six years. It is difficult but I have peace of mind that his needs are being taken care of and he has a better life than he did there. I had difficulties with Safeguarding even believing what was happening. Police had intelligence information which could not be corroborated by my son because he is blind and has learning difficulties and problems with memory. This is a major problem with people who have capacity but are unable to identify or remember the perpetrators. People in charge close ranks as it is their integrity that is being brought into question, the Best Interests of those being cared for is usually the last thing on their minds.

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