Sex and Learning Disability: My 31yr old son has LD... - Mencap


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Sex and Learning Disability

Lindypops56 profile image

My 31yr old son has LD and Autism and lives in supported accommodation near our home. He has a fiancée who has Downs Syndrome. They appear to love each other very much and are now wanting to have a physical relationship. I’m not entirely sure that either of them fully understand what this entails both physically and emotionally but now that the issue has been raised we all need to consider it! Obviously this is a minefield of an area and needs a lot of safeguards in place to protect both of them but just wondering if anyone out there has similar experiences or advice.

We are in the early stages of discussions with Social Work and the support services where our son lives.

5 Replies

Hi Lindypops56 - have you come across the Supported Loving Toolkit? Tons of advice and resources for supporting someone with a learning disability around love, relationships and intimacy. Really useful. Here's the link:

You're right, it can feel like such a minefield, you just want to do the best thing by them, you're not alone. Fx

Thank you so much! This has been really helpful x

Sarah_Mencap profile image

Hello Lindypops56

It is wonderful that your son has such a good relationship with his fiancee, and that he talks to you about it all.

Have you seen the pages on the Mencap website about this -

> Sexuality and relationships advice and support -

> Sexuality and relationships - FAQs -

There is also a download with loads of information -

We're hoping to have an expert from Brook here mid-September for Sexual Health Week. I will post on here as soon as this is confirmed.

I hope this helps a little.

Best wishes


Thank you so much Sarah. I’ll look out for the info

Sarah_Mencap profile image
Sarah_MencapAdministrator in reply to Lindypops56

Hello again

I hope you are well. Amber from Brook is here all week if you'd like to ask her a question -



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