I was lost but then I found my smile 😁 - Fun Beyond 10K & ...

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I was lost but then I found my smile 😁

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles
β€’72 Replies

Can I post here? I just ran 13.1 kilometres! Skip this bit as it's a bit melodramatic if you want.

I've had a terrible couple of days, no running, some walking and some ceiling painting. Someone said to me grief is a bit like climbing a mountain, you feel you just can't keep going, and then you get to the top and go down the other side and think phew I got over that one, then there's another mountain in front of you. Some are taller than others. The one I've been struggling over is huge.

Yesterday I didn't want to see anyone so I shut myself in.

Today I wanted to run.

I played around in the Garmin app trying to find a route that was at least 10k and failing miserably, so I set up a NRC 10k run a playlist on Spotify and off I went. Still not sure where I was going I headed north, crossed the dual carriageway and onto the Downs, a different route than I've ever been before, fields, hills, cows, sheep, wood pigeons, a wren, a blackbird, some magpies and a finch. Green for miles around, hedges, fences, brambles, mist over the hills and no sight of the sea although I knew it was there somewhere.

I slogged on up and up. Passed a couple of walkers with cheery hello's.

I'd set the Garmin to 1 minute run 1 minute walk but I soon got fed up with that! I shouted at it sometimes when it buzzed, and carried on running, my goodness it's steep, its rutted, it's narrow, it's overgrown, I'm so slow. but at last it opens out and I come to a crossroads, with a signpost, this is exciting, it says, bridleway 🀣🀣🀣 pointing all 4 directions 🀣🀣🀣 but I think I might recognise one way which is ,yup you guessed it, uphill, so on I go.

A few cyclists pass both ways, a couple of people with dogs, everyone returns my greeting

There are storms crossing the channel, I start to hope I get home before they get here.

Then I'm at the top and it's down hill all the way to the sea front.

And 10k done βœ… but not home yet so on I run, my pace which was abysmally slow going over the Downs has picked up again, my legs feel fine, goodness me I can do this, I can keep running gently, I can take walk breaks.

Will I make 10 miles? Not today, that hill was brutal, and I want to go home.

For the last kilometre I can feel spots of rain on my bare arms, just a few, and there it is, tugging at the corner if my mouth 😁 I've found my smile.

Run happy everyone, my next goal is 10 miles and it won't be long but I know one thing for sure, it'll be on the flat roads, but I did enjoy being out in the countryside, and there's something very satisfying about slogging up the hills,

Written by
SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun
10 Miles
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72 Replies
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Doris8 profile image
Doris8

Really really well done Sola. Grief can take a long time. Willow would be absolutely proud of you. πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ€—

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Doris8

Thank you, yeah I think he might be

Oldfloss profile image
OldflossAdministrator

Few words..my heart is full and my eyes also, full of tears ...You, my friend are so special...keep that smile...even when it is hidden...

He knows...he sees...

Very, very well done, on, oh, so many levels xxx

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Oldfloss

Thank you Floss, some days it just overwhelmes me but if I can get out before that happens the rest of the day is bearable xx

AlMorr profile image
AlMorrHalf Marathon

A big congratulations to you Sola on that 13.19K run today, a very inspiring post from you, I do notice on the rain radar a lot of thunderstorms in the north of France, they look that they are heading north so as you say will cross the channel and hit the south of England later, at least you now have completed that wonderful run, well done πŸ˜€ πŸƒπŸΎ πŸ‘πŸ‘βœ…βœ…

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to AlMorr

Thanks Al, we've had drizzle on and off all afternoon and at last the garden looks damp, I so wanted to go another 3k but after those hills that I don't run on very much, I was near home so came home, maybe next time I go for a long run

Beachcomber66 profile image
Beachcomber66AdministratorHalf Marathon

Firstly, what an awesome run. One of those; what you needed, just at the right time. Some days you need a shut in, and that is ok too. Grief hits you out of nowhere. Of course anyone can post here at any time…but 13k en route to 10 miles? Welcome to the world of crazy runners of prodigious distances….fully paid up member Sola!!πŸ™‚

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Beachcomber66

Thank you 😊 I'm hoping all the consistent running will help my pace a bit, I was saying good morning to people I passed but it was gone 2om when I got home, I went out later than I realised

Beachcomber66 profile image
Beachcomber66AdministratorHalf Marathon in reply to SueAppleRun

I did one of the speed runs on the NRCHM app each week to start with. More a question of finding different paces ( so everything wasn’t at easy pace) rather than trying to run really quickly. The pace picks up a little week on week. The long slower runs helps your pace too though; strength and stamina. You are doing really well. Just enjoy it.

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Beachcomber66

When I run up those hills and the next run I'm on the flat I seem to be flying along, I love the speed runs and my gentle comfortable pace is definitely faster than back in spring, just going out a few times every week helps

Beachcomber66 profile image
Beachcomber66AdministratorHalf Marathon in reply to SueAppleRun

I think that you are going to surprise yourself πŸ¦Έβ€β™€οΈ

Jools2020 profile image
Jools2020Half Marathon

Oh, Sola, I think you really needed that run! And you needed to share it, too. I think your analogy of the mountains is spot on.

It is emotional to read this from you, maybe because I’m still battling my mountains, too.

But they do get smaller and more spaced apart with time.

In the meantime WOW -what a great run!! πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸƒβ€β™€οΈπŸƒβ€β™€οΈπŸƒβ€β™€οΈπŸ₯²β€οΈ

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Jools2020

Thanks Jools, yes, the mountains are more spaced apart, it used to only be minutes between them, and some aren't so huge, that run was needed and I think yesterday's shutting away from the world was needed too

Jools2020 profile image
Jools2020Half Marathon in reply to SueAppleRun

I agree. It’s processing time and necessary, too!

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Jools2020

Exactly

Sulley101 profile image
Sulley101

What a great run Sola! It’s so uplifting to see beautiful countryside and nature’s creatures just doing their thing isn’t it. 😊 Some times that’s just what we need 😊.

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Sulley101

Yes, and a run on our own

Scruff55 profile image
Scruff55

what a wonderful brave run for you today Sola. You are amazing. Willow would be so so proud and I’m sure he was with you every step of the way. Really well done. πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Scruff55

Thank you, I think he would

Irishprincess profile image
IrishprincessAdministratorHalf Marathon

What an inspiring post! I loved reading that.

You definitely got to the top of that mountain Sola, literally and figuratively. A huge well done πŸ‘πŸ‘ Your training is going splendidly.

There’s a shiny 10 mile badge just waiting for you to claim it very soon …… 😍

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Irishprincess

Thank you so much, I really really want that badge too, but it takes me so long to run any distance

Cmoi profile image
CmoiMarathon in reply to SueAppleRun

"it takes me so long to run any distance"

You and me both SueAppleRun . My excuse is that I run hills, but that's pathetic and insignificant compared to your taking on challenging, unfamiliar terrain while battling grief mountains. You're a superwoman!

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Cmoi

Those hills, but I found some okness going up them and my smile as I came back down them, it was the narrowness if the pathways that really slowed me down, I really didn't want to fall up there and with loose chalk stones the ground felt very unstable at times.

Irishprincess profile image
IrishprincessAdministratorHalf Marathon in reply to SueAppleRun

It matters not how long it takes. There’s no hurry x

Roxdog profile image
Roxdog10 Miles

Oh Sola sorry you had that big grief hill to climb, but you ran down the other side. Isn't running just a big gift!

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Roxdog

It really is thanks, and made me realise I need to get out on my own to feel better,

Roxdog profile image
Roxdog10 Miles in reply to SueAppleRun

Yes, sometimes being around other people isn't what we need. So a run on your own sounds perfect and what a great distance!

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Roxdog

I felt at peace running in my own, I've done a lot of running and walking with others and lots of chatter which is great but doesn't help

RunBrianRun profile image
RunBrianRunHalf Marathon

That’s inspiring Sola. I’m so glad you climbed that mountain. πŸ’ͺ you can definitely do the 16km, just not yet. Have a well earned rest. Take care

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to RunBrianRun

Thanks Brian, tomorrow I'll just have a walk I think, and when I do run the 16k it definitely won't be over the Downs, seafront is nice and flat

Birdlady64 profile image
Birdlady64

Oh wow! That run came just when you needed it most, and what a run it was too. You are so inspiring and yes grief is a funny thing, and it hits you from nowhere sometimes. I dedicated my run today to my dear Dad and absolutely loved reading this, even though it made me quite teary.

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Birdlady64

I'm sorry about the tears, I felt better for the run

Killerblue profile image
Killerblue

That is amazing !!! Well done πŸ‘ no wonder you found your smile πŸ‘πŸ‘

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Killerblue

I knew it was in there somewhere but it's been hiding lately

Runninggirl59 profile image
Runninggirl59

Well done Sola, a moving post and inspiring post. X

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Runninggirl59

Thank you, x

grumpyoldgirl profile image
grumpyoldgirl

πŸ’•

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to grumpyoldgirl

❣️

BGood profile image
BGood

Grief is a funny thing! Hard to comprehend and very unexpected!

It’s so lovely you have a good support network of friends family and your neighbours around you!

Sometimes you really can’t face it or the world outside!

This run on your own out in nature seeing the world without having to explain yourself to anyone and just saying Hi to the odd person along the way without a deep and meaningful conversation seems to be what you needed!

Well done on an awesome run πŸƒβ€β™€οΈ and well done for getting yourself out the front door!

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to BGood

Thank you, sometimes pretending I'm ok becomes too much so I shut everyone out, I did feel a lot better after the run

BGood profile image
BGood

Your welcome! Obviously what you needed today 😊

aliboo70 profile image
aliboo70Half Marathon

What a lovely post, and you saw lots of great views and wildlife ,perfect. I love trails the best! This is a brilliant achievement and so glad you found your smile, very well done, keep on going ! Carrying someone special with you who would be so pleased and I'm sure was watching over you πŸ˜˜πŸƒβ€β™€οΈπŸ’ͺxxx

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to aliboo70

Thank you, it was a run I really needed

Dexy5 profile image
Dexy510 Miles

A new day, new hope and a new personal distance. Well done Sola.

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Dexy5

Thank you Dexy5 πŸ˜ƒ

JonathanP profile image
JonathanP10 Miles

Fantastic Sola! 10 miles is waiting for you.....

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to JonathanP

I hope it doesn't have to wait long

Sandraj39 profile image
Sandraj39Half Marathon

This is such a moving and inspiring read Sola - and what a terrific run for you!πŸ™‚

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Sandraj39

Thanks, it was

Tetleyteagirl profile image
Tetleyteagirl

Amazing post Sola, so lovely to read this morning. That 10miles is there waiting for you, with that smile, when you are ready. Well done you 😊

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Tetleyteagirl

I'll b ready soon thanks, I woke early wondering if a short half hour run would be a good idea

Cmoi profile image
CmoiMarathon

Can I post here? I just ran 13.1 kilometres!

Too damn right you can SueAppleRun ! You ran further than 10K, in fact further than you've ever run before, in particularly challenging circumstances, and found your smile.

If that doesn't merit a post on here, then I don't know what does.

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Cmoi

Thank you Cmoi I am starting to feel all grown up

Cmoi profile image
CmoiMarathon in reply to SueAppleRun

I've been playing P!nk's Raise your Glass while writing the weekly chat 😁 as I still don't feel like a grown-up on here.

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Cmoi

The amount you run makes you grown up, I love that song, 🀩

Curlygurly2 profile image
Curlygurly2Half Marathon

You are amazing xx

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Curlygurly2

Thanks, I just feel ordinary xx

Cmoi profile image
CmoiMarathon in reply to SueAppleRun

Yes, you're ordinary as in my Kate Rusby theme song SueAppleRun ! πŸ€—

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Cmoi

Surprisingly my legs don't ache this morning, I half expected to hobble around, I now believe I'll run that half marathon

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Cmoi

What a lovely voice she has I've now listened to a couple of her songs

Leotigris profile image
Leotigris10 Miles

That's brilliant Sola, what an amazing achievement despite everything

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Leotigris

Thank you 😊

Frizzbomb67 profile image
Frizzbomb6710 Miles

Wow! What a great post and a great run! It sounds such a beautiful place where you run, especially to a towny like me. I’m glad you found your smile. I hope it sticks around a while 😊

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Frizzbomb67

Thank you, I think if I keep running my smile will stick around a bit more often

cheekychipmunks profile image
cheekychipmunksHalf Marathon

I have so much respect for you Sola. I simply don’t know how you muster the grit and strength. But holy cow you do, and you know that Willow is looking down with so much pride. Grief is tough, but you’re tougher.

Of course you can run 10 miles and HM. It’s just a matter of time. I can’t wait to see those achievements, first on Strava, then your triumphant posts on here. We all know you’ll do it, and Willow will be there to guide you. ❀️

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to cheekychipmunks

At least now he's not sitting waiting wondering how long I'll be out. It was a sad day when he decided to stop running, but he did keep saying once the weather warmed up he'd come with me again,

Freecloud profile image
FreecloudMarathon

The most important words in your great report were "I've found my smile". It makes all of that slogging up the hills worth it. I too am always full of ideas of setting alarms on my Garmin and find them very annoying when they go off πŸ˜‚.

Onwards and er Upwards 🀣!

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to Freecloud

πŸ˜€ onwards and flatwards next long run, but I will go up those hills again and others as it's so beautiful

misswobble profile image
misswobbleMarathon

There is! It’s you versus the hill I suppose. It’s good to know you can conquer the damned thing πŸ’ͺπŸ˜€πŸ‘

So pleased you’ve found your smile πŸ™‚πŸ˜˜

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to misswobble

It wobbles a bit my smile but it's there and thank you

linda9389 profile image
linda9389AdministratorMarathon

Boy, did you find your way again.

Try to remember that next time you feel you're at the foot of a mountain xxx

We have a ten mile badge waiting just for you πŸ₯°

SueAppleRun profile image
SueAppleRun10 Miles in reply to linda9389

Thanks Linda, I so want that badge but it might be sensible to wait a week or two, I plan a long run this weekend, along the seafront where it's not so steep

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