Nearly nine months ago my husband was the victim of a brutal assault, resulting in the assailant pleading guilty to GBH with intent, and being jailed for several years a couple of weeks ago. It happened near his rowing club, a place heโd been going several times a week since 1981, and it was 100% unprovoked.
It was also the route I used to build up to, and run, my first HM distance, and it remained a great go-to if I fancied a flat pretty trail run along the river. However I was disinclined to go there after the assault and Iโve been avoiding it like the plague. My husband, by the way, made a miraculous full recovery and is back rowing and racing like nothing ever happened. Strong man. ๐ช๐ฅฐ
However today I thought Iโd return and get over myself. It felt odd and I couldnโt help but glance across to where I know the assault happened. I told myself to get a grip, there were plenty of dog walkers and other runners around. I also made an exception and ran with Flossie on her lead. Having a dog by my side felt better somehow, even though sheโs the most gentle little girl ever! Fierce Labrador? Far from it! ๐๐
It was lovely. Totally unremarkable and very slow (covered 7k in an hour), but I was in no hurry and Iโm mindful that Flossie is now 10 and is always off lead nowadays when I run with her. Iโm hoping Iโve kicked those apprehension gremlins into touch.
So that nasty chapter is over. Running was there for me throughout, as it has the wonderful knack of doing, and I can look forward to this spring and summer. Next weekend is the London Vitality 10000, so howโs that for a fun start?
Thanks for reading this. It helps to write things down (aka bore people rigid!!) โค๏ธ
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cheekychipmunks
Half Marathon
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Not boring; your post makes complete sense. Running helps us to leave bad things behind us and live with those things we canโt or donโt want to move on from. Well done for facing your gremlins; it wouldnโt do to let the offender have even the semblance of a victory ๐
Thanks so much BC, I do go on sometimes! But yes, running is wonderful like that, and knowing the guy is banged up made it doable for me today. Thanks for your support. ๐
You never bore anyone with your posts cheekychipmunks, I am so glad that your husband is back to rowing and the man who assaulted him is in prison.That was a good run for you today with Flossie, indeed you will be getting ready for The London Vitality 10,000 a week tomorrow, Dexy5 and UpTheStanley are also running in London, I am doing the virtual version the following Wednesday.
Thanks, thatโs kind to say Al. Iโd rather get it out in the open, plus I know how fellow runners understand how running really can help us in all kinds of situations.
Canโt wait for next weekend. Itโs likely that Dexy5 and I will run together. ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ
Flossie and Holly, my neighbours dog who I take a walk at 2pm would get on very well if they met each other, both tails would be wagging like mad, Holly and Flossie are so friendly.
Thanks RW. Itโs a lovely river trail, but naturally I wanted to avoid it until the guy was well and truly incarcerated. It felt good to be back, and yes it was definitely lovely having Flossie trotting alongside. ๐ ๐
Oh Cheeky, what an awful thing to happen! I am so glad your husband is fit and well again ๐ Well done to you for completing that important run, with lovely Flossie looking after you ๐ฅฐ
Thanks so much SS. Yes, heโs clearly made of strong stuff as his injuries were nasty, but youโd never know looking at him now. Such a relief. โค๏ธ
Flossie has been my little rock and she certainly helped today. ๐
That was very brave, even with Flossie to protect you, but facing the demons in the past has made you stronger and writing it down is hopefully closure, something that you will never forget but wonโt define you. Glad to know your husband made a full recovery
Thank you Sola. Yes I do believe this is closure. The guy has been behind bars since it happened - he was never granted bail - but I wanted to wait until he was sentenced for real before returning to the river. Flossie helped. โค๏ธ
Very well done cheeky, I know how you loved that path but can fully understand your dread of running it again. You waited until the time was right and you and Flossie beat all those demons. The assault really was a case of wrong place , wrong time and today was the right place at the right time. I am so glad that Mr Cheeky has fully recovered and is back to rowing again too.
So looking forward to seeing you both again in London.
Long? Iโve seen far longer posts! ๐โโ๏ธ๐
Thanks Dexy. I couldnโt face returning until he was officially sentenced, even though he had been behind bars since he was charged. Even so, I wonโt go running down there in the early mornings like I used to. Itโs pretty isolated in places. Flossie and I were a good team today though. ๐๐ฅฐ
Mr Cheeky is one fortunate fellow, thatโs for sure. His rowing fitness clearly helped. ๐ช
Weโll see you next week! Yay!! ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ
Well done for getting out on the route again cheekychipmunks especially after such a horrible thing happened. Glad that Flossie was able to run with you too - she looks such a sweet lady. Hopefully see you at the Vitality next weekend!
That's such an achievement cheekychipmunks , well done to you and that savage monster Flossie too! So pleased your husband's recovered well and that the criminal who attacked him has been jailed - I hope it was a guilty plea from the outset, to spare you even more trauma.
Here's to many more happy runs! ๐โโ๏ธ๐ถ๐
Thanks Cmoi. Ahh yes, sheโs ferocious my Labrador! ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฑ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ
Yes the guy was remanded on the day that it happened and was put behind bars with no bail granted. He did plead guilty Iโm relieved to say, and he was sentenced a couple of weeks ago. Such a relief. ๐๐ป The run today was lovely. ๐ฅฐ
Thanks for your kind words sparky. It was hideous, but it could have been a whole lot worse. My husband is the brave one, and it feels good to be able to put the whole sorry episode behind us.
Canโt wait to run in London for the first time. ๐
Running as therapy, isnโt that what itโs partly about? Nothing remotely boring about that. Good for you Cheeky, beating those gremlins. Heres to many more miles along your favourite path x
Too true TC. Itโs helped me a few times as well as countless others on here. โค๏ธ Iโll definitely be back there again more regularly now. ๐โโ๏ธ
I think(hopefully) that I speak for most on here, that you wouldn't bore people rigid. I think this is a really supportive network of like mined people who all want to help and support each other, so no worries there. Glad to hear your husband is fit and well again.
I remember you saying on here when it had happened and having gone through something similar many years ago, I totally understand how and why you feel the way you do. My partner and my one of my male best friends were assaulted as we were walking home from my 40th birthday, by a group of males with baseball bats, totally unprovoked, and it was terrifying. For months I avoided going anyway near the place it had happened and still remember it so vividly, but you sound like you totally faced up to your fears and gained confidence again to put it behind you. Well done on that, it does take a lot of guts and its not easy.
I wasn't into running at the time this happened, but if it was now, I think running would give me the place and space to have peace of mind and some calmness.
My remaining dog (lost my other dog Billy 1 6 months ago) is nearly 14 and can't run with me now but I did used to love running with Billy, somehow I always felt more safe and protected!
Take care and I hope you continue to find strength and peace in your running.
Oh Hedgehogs, I had no idea. How terrifying for you to witness the assault of your partner and friend. ๐ That must have affected you badly. I didnโt witness my husbandโs attack, in fact no one did at first. Luckily the guy was spotted by some people when he tried to run away and he was captured shortly after.
My husband felt fine to return to the club when he was fit enough to drive. He didnโt want the guy to ruin his enjoyment of rowing, and whenever he parks his car he has to walk past the scene of the crime, literally. I couldnโt until the assailant was jailed, it was too disturbing.
I agree, this forum is simply the best for support. The running community is so giving and I feel so fortunate having become a part of it.
Ahh, Billy sounded lovely. ๐ฅฐ A running buddy! Arenโt they wonderful companions? Flossie just runs off lead with me now, except for todayโs one-off. Sheโs fit, but I want her to remain that way. ๐
Not a boring post at all - if it helps to write it then it's great and just think how much you always help others with your posts and comments! This is no exception! I'm so glad Flossie gave you the strength. I took Bob today for same reason- I just don't feel safe running along the canal with out him. How great that you can feel happier along this route now ๐
Ahh thanks so much CLR. Iโm so much better writing things down or talking them through. So thanks for your kind comments!
I donโt blame you taking Bob. Even before all this happened, I often used to think how isolated the river path was and I used to feel uneasy sometimes. Iโll always make sure I go when there are more people around from now on. It slows progress as itโs quite narrow in places, but itโs a trail so not a fast run anyway.
Thank you so much Sandra. Yes, today was a big deal. I dreaded returning for the first time, but today seemed right and it was busy enough not to feel isolated. Plus Flossie helped too! ๐ I would definitely say it was empowering. โค๏ธ
Thanks so much. Birdlady! Oh gosh yes, running is amazing when we need a bit of mental TLC. It also helped when I lost my mum in 2019, and I know other people on here have found it comforting too.
Canโt wait to run in London next week. Itโll be my first time running there! ๐โโ๏ธ
Sorry your husband has been through such a shocking time , you sound like a strong & resilient pair and we'll done to you and your loyal doggo for facing up to heading back there. Onwards and upwards xxx ๐
Thanks so much Jonathan. It was hideous and totally surreal and I still canโt believe it happened. The main thing is, thereโs no lasting damage to Mr Cheeky and we can move on. ๐
Far from boring and with a good ending to that awful chapter. Onwards and upwards! Good luck at the London Vitality 10000 next week. Iโll be there too x
Omg cheeky, what a traumatic event, youโve beat your demons by running the site and facing it head on, thank god that guy is inside where he belongs and your husband is back to full health. Long may your strength and confidence go on xx
Thanks Walshy! Yes indeed, getting back there was important to me (hubby went back as soon as he was able to drive - how, Iโll never know!) Yesterday seemed like the right day, and it was. ๐ฅฐ๐
Good for you! Full kudos to Mr CC for bouncing right back. They only win if we let them! I can wholeheartedly understand your hesitation in running there but glad you managed it ๐๐ป๐
Thanks so much JoJo. His fitness saved him 100%, absolutely no doubt about it. And now the vile attacker is safely behind bars I felt safe enough to return. Iโm so relieved. ๐ฅฐ
I know just how hard that must have been, so well done for having the guts to go. Now you really can move on and put it behind you. See you on Sunday xx ๐๐
Thanks Sandy. Itโs a chapter in our lives we can now move on from, and I can get back to running along the river every so often and enjoying it for what it is. ๐ฅฐ
Bring on Sunday (oh, and Monday!) ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ๐๐
Not boring at all. Just the final chapter/happy ending to a deeply traumatic event. Running has worked its magic and dear old Flossie has been by you side all the way.
So pleased to hear that your husband is totally recovered and you have won the day and reclaimed your peace of mind.
Aww thanks Week7. Yes, the last few months have been tricky, but all is now as it should be. Flossie and running have been fabulous, as has the support from all my wonderful friends on here. โค๏ธ
Not at all boring cheeky (your posts never are). It takes a lot to overcome trauma and face our fears. So glad you had Flossie by your side ๐ฅฐ๐ฅฐ also glad your husband is fully recovered and you're both back doing what you love. Big hugs ๐ค
Youโre very kind Beatles! I canโt write concisely (even my replies go on and on sometimes!!) but it really does help to share. Iโm glad Iโm not boring you all! ๐ ๐
Time to move on and run for fun by the river whenever I can. Flossie loves it there too. โค๏ธ
Oh well done Munks! You exorcised those demons for good ๐
I hope that, every time you go now, youโll start to think about how good and strong your run feels and you and Flossie can just enjoy the moments ๐
I did didnโt I, IP? I needed to get back there, as did Mr Cheeky - although he went back the moment he could drive again! How, Iโll never know. ๐คทโโ๏ธ
Flossie and I are a great team, and you guys have all been wonderful support, so thank you! โค๏ธ
Cheeky, thank you for sharing this with us. I remember your runs on Strava at the time it happened. It's good to hear that your husband has fully recovered, and wonderful that you can now, once again, enjoy riverside runs with your faithful friend. Enjoy London xx โค
Ahh youโre so welcome CSMN. Itโs therapeutic for me to write things down and I hoped youโd all understand, being the wonderful community that you all are. ๐๐ป
London will be such fun. Shame Flossie canโt come too! ๐
Iโm glad youโve gone back to run there! Itโs hopefully closed the door on that painful episode and youโre both moving on. Physically easier than the mental side of things but youโre both tough, and with your friend at your side, youโre reassured.
The weather is improving and the lengthening days promise so much outdoors fun. Enjoy yourselves! You deserve to be happy now after such a hard time ๐๐๐โโ๏ธ๐
Thanks so much MW. Iโm truly amazed how my husband recovered, both physically and mentally. Iโm sure he must relive the episode from time to time, but heโs strong and has a great support system if he needs it.
As for me, Iโm fine as long as he is. I have my running to turn to, most of the time with my dog, and itโs helped no end. I knew you guys would understand, as the running community, and this forum, is second to none. ๐ฅฐ
I understand what you mean about your husband! Youโre stabilising each other, balancing out whatโs great about life, and itโs going to be much better going forward together now. Itโs a new life! (dare I say). There was before and thereโs now.
I wish you and your husband all the luck in the world. Running, rowing, fun with the dog. Simple pleasures but all combine to make life good! ๐
Aw ... Well done to you and Flossie! So very pleased to read your post. That you can run the pretty trail run along the river again and that your husband has recovered so, so well- such good news is welcome indeed! By the way t is not a long post at all and you never bore me! ๐๐โโ๏ธ๐
Oh wow cheekychipmunks . I canโt imagine what you and your husband have been through. I am so glad to hear he is fully recovered. Going back to the scene of the assault would be incredibly hard and would bring many emotions with it. Mad respect that you were able to do that.
Youโre so kind Sask, thank you. I waited until the guy was well and truly behind proper bars before venturing back, and Iโm glad I did. My husband returned ages ago - he wasnโt going to let the vile man ruin his enjoyment of his favourite sport. ๐ฃ๐ฟโโ๏ธ
cheekychipmunks sorry to hear your family went through this traumatic time. Huge well done for continuing with the running and great to hear it got you through it.
What a horrible thing to happen to you both, Mr Cheeky physically and you emotionally. So good you can now run in that beautiful place again and not let it be spoiled for you both. Two very brave people.x
It certainly was a shock Mormor. Crack of dawn on a Sunday morning in the summer. But yes, heโs recovered remarkably well and we can both move on, he with his rowing and me with my running by the river. ๐
Understandable that you would face that route with trepidation, but great that you've managed to overcome that so that you can move on. Sometimes we need our "go to routes" so to be deprived of one for such a terrible reason is unimaginable.
So good to hear your husband has made a full recovery.
Thanks sTrongFuse. I seriously doubted whether Iโd ever want to run there again, but with my husband passing the exact spot where it happened every time he goes to the club I thought Iโd better face up to it. If he can, I certainly can! But still, Iโll make my runs later than when I used to use that route. Iโd rather there were people about, whereas before I preferred avoiding them.
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