Lost my Mum to Lung Cancer in 2005, now my Dad has been diagnosed with the same

Feeling a little shell shocked this morning, my Dad was diagnosed with Lung Cancer yesterday.

We had suspected something was not right, and over the last few weeks he's been for various tests etc. Yesterday he received the results. His cancer is too advanced for Chemo. He was offered Radiotherapy, but turned it down, as he saw my Mum go through all the treatments offered for no real benefit (6 months of painful treatment for an extra 6 months of life).

His prognosis was he might see the year out.

I'm still taking this news in, it seems so cruel that he has what my Mum had. Yes I know they were both life long smokers, but that doesn't make it any easier.

He lives down in Dorset, 2 hours away from me, so I don't get to see him as often as I would like.

So I guess here starts an interesting chapter in our lives.

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  • Dear Andrew

    So very sorry to hear about the loss of your Mum and your Dad's recent diagnosis. Nothing really prepares us for receiving this kind of news. How is your Dad coping? It is such a difficult time for you all and bound to bring back memories of your Mums illness.

    Small cell lung cancer has limited treatment options, whereas non -small cell lung cancer , even advanced, can have more choice of treatments. Do you know what type of lung cancer your Dad has?

    There is a lung cancer support group in St Leonards, Dorset if your Dad was interested in going, the details are: - Melanie Munro, St Leonards Hotel, Ringwood Road St Leonards, Dorset BH24 2NP 01202 704 877 1st Tuesday of the month 1.30pm.

    The other option would be to consider a second opinion or look to see if there is a clinical trial that your Dad may be eligible for, you will find this on the cancer research uk website. I have placed the direct link below:

    cancerresearchuk.org/about-...[0]=field_trial_status%3A4386

    We have lots of information on our website roycastle.org on living with lung cancer, which you can order online and we can post this out to you.

    The Macmillan nurses contact number is 0808 808 0000

    If you wish to discuss anything you can call us on our free nurse led helpline number on 0800 358 7200

    All the best

    The Roy Castle Support Team

  • Hello Andrew, its Jules here.

    My mum has lung cancer that cant be treated to cure - only treated to extend her time with us.

    So so sad reading your post - it also made me sad that you dont live near so you could be with your dad whenever you liked.

    It woke me up to how lucky i am that my mum has moved in with me and my husband whilst she is ill. (whilst she is ill - that was hard to type).

    Anyway - you sound like you were close to your mum and are also with your dad. My mum was a life long (heavy) smoker, up until about 18 months before diagnosis. She had just decided to join everyone else in the family in using e-cigs, didnt have a clue she was probably already unwell.

    Mum will not have chemo either - but with mum its because she had strokes just the year before and apparently it can bring one on ? But i posted a couple days ago here that she has been lucky enough to be accepted onto a drug trial at our local 'Bobby Robson Cancer Hospital'. Shes had radio therapy for a cancer that had spread to the skin on her belly, but no other drugs yet - she was only diagnosed March this year i think it was. Was in a different country at the time and had to travel home to me with that knowledge.

    Just wanted to say hi and hello really and to let you know i read your post and was thinking of you and your dad.

    Kindest

    Jules

    x

  • Hi Jules.

    Many thanks for your kind words, I've calmed down now I've had time to process the news.

    The one think I remember from my Mum's fight with cancer is how much of an emotional roller coaster this is.

    Looking forward to seeing my Dad this weekend, no doubt there will be some tears but also some smiles and laughter.

    I wish you and your Mum well with her fight with this dreadful disease.

    Andrew.

  • Hii would have to agree. With your dad i lost my partner to sclc end of march and the chemo done nothing for him wot so ever he was told from the begining it wasnt curable all he got was 6months of heartache. And pain if its curable evryone has a chance but my oppion i would not put myself threw it after seeing my poor boyfreind suffer for nothing at the end hope your dad has a fighting chance. And he can make the right decisions. God bless xx

  • Sorry to hear your news of your father. Hope things get better for you.

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