In Shock

[bobby7mc]

Wife was told she has stage 4 lung cancer 6 weeks ago. The Dr. painted a very dismal picture they started her today on Alimta/Carb Keytruda and something else.. This has put us both into shock... At Christmas she was more active than most people in their 20s .. She is 55.. Now she is in terrible shape.. sleeps most of the time. cant keep anything on her stomach, struggles just to take a bath . I am praying,...

[gibdonnalee Community Superhero]

Bobbie

[gibdonnalee Community Superhero in reply to gibdonnalee]

Sorry I spelled your name wrong, Bobby. Also sorry of your wife's diagnosis. I also have stage 4 lung cancer. Don't ever give up hope! I was told the same thing 5 years ago! Yet, here I am. I realize things can change at any time, but with help from family, friends and this forum I feel stronger and don't dwell on the what if's so much . Try to get your wife to read a few statements on here, and become a frequent reader or a member.God bless, hope this helps.

[bobby7mc in reply to gibdonnalee]

Thank You .. I will share this with her.. I am at work now.. She seems in great spirits today.. She is red in the face, I am sure that is from the treatments

[PegD]

The shock of a stage 4 diagnosis is nothing short of experiencing an inconceivable trauma. I was diagnosed stage 4 with no targetable mutations and low TMB in July of 2016. 57 yrs old at diagnosis, never smoker, super healthy except for lung cancer as it turned out. My first line was Carbo/Alimta followed by Alimta maintenance. I’m on my second line of treatment (Ramucirumab and Docetaxel) and am doing well with stable disease. I’m also planning a trip to Australia in April! When I was first diagnosed, I could not conceive of this trip being possible.

If your wife is on Carbo/Alimta and Keytruda this would suggest that she doesn’t have any targetable genomic mutations and thus not a candidate for TKI therapies. Did she have any tumor testing done? If your treatment center has a Palliative Care department they can help with the side effects of her treatment. Palliative Care is NOT hospice. They are dedicated to helping with patients’ quality of life while going through treatment.

Do what you can to stay strong. So glad you are reaching out to this community. My husband is my rock but he has also learned that he needs support just as much as I do. Wishing your wife, you and your family peace and love. There is always hope. Check in often.

~Peg

[bobby7mc in reply to PegD]

I have no way to describe the terror that ran right through both of us when the Dr. talked with us.. every visit we seemed to get more and more bad news.. However, we were told she would be awful sick after the treatments.. But my awesome Anita has been doing soooooo good.. aside from what she calls a little stomach pain, everything else has been good overnight and so far this morning all is good.. matter of fact she was out sweeping the sidewalk after I went to work this morning.. I asked her to please go back inside and take care of herself, to leave the sidewalk to me when I get home...

[Ncpoet]

Bobby, i was diagnosed with stage 4 adenocarcinoma lung cancer in 2013. I was on carboplatin and alimta. Later took Xalkori for 7 months, then Zykadia for 5. Then back on Alimta for a year. Have been in remission since 2016. Keytruda was new and suggested as a possibility if cancer reoccurred. My cancer was in a lung, outside the lung, the chest wall and a lymph node. I heard the statistics at the time but told my doctor I did not believe in them. I maintained a positive attitude filled with hope, a strong faith, a supportive family and found something to laugh about everyday. Treatment was not a piece of cake. I also was fatigued and either slept too much or not enough. Yes, I was weak and had trouble with nausea and diarrhea. I was shaky after taking a shower and had to rest before I could dry my hair. Let the doctor know about her nausea and other side effects and there are some medications that can help with that. Don’t worry about her lack of activities right now. She is in the fight of her life and her energy is diverted to surviving. This diagnosis is not as dire as it once was. Survival rates keep going up. Our task is to keep hanging in there. New treatments coming up all the time and I feel a cure is just around the corner. Meanwhile, I will settle for remission. Has she done the genetic testing that allows her to have the newer immuneotherapy drugs instead of chemo? This is a good place to connect with lung cancer survivors and caregivers. All the best to you both.

Romans 12:12

Judy

[bobby7mc in reply to Ncpoet]

I am sending these replies to her phone as text messages..

[FtB_Peggy]

Bobby and Anita, welcome! I am so glad you reached out to this wise community - these folks understand and care. Please know you are not alone in this fight. I would also very much like to help, so I will private message you as well. Keep loving one another and be patient with the process, if you can. As it was said, you have been dealt a hard blow, allow yourself time to get over the shock and be kind to yourself too. Please keep talking with us.

[bobby7mc in reply to FtB_Peggy]

today i am thinking about back in december. my boss said that i was going to be off on two nights that were normal working days for me.. she thought i would be unhappy with that news.. but my reply was .. " That's ok.. I will have more time to spend with my awesome Anita" ...

[FtB_Peggy in reply to bobby7mc]

Bless you both!

[Buddy03 in reply to bobby7mc]

Prayers for healing for your wife.

[Denzie Moderator Volunteer]

It’s been 7 years for me since I had my stage 4 diagnosis. I still remember the dread and sorrow I felt when my doctor told me I only had 10-15 months.

As you’ve figured out, that fatigue is her body fighting the cancer. She might find showers using a shower chair easier than a bath if that is an option.

When we’re diagnosed we give up much control over our lives and our own care. Sweeping the walk is your wife’s way of taking back a piece of that control. It’s a characteristic that suggests she’s going to be an awesome cancer fighter. When she has the energy don’t fight against her need to bring order to her life. The exercise she’ll get doing it will also be beneficial to her post treatment. It will help her recover her energy much faster.

PegD gave you some valuable advice when she suggested you bring in a palliative care doctor. A recent study demonstrated that adding a palliative care team added 4.5 months of progression free survival. That’s the equivalent of a course of chemo for some patients without the toxicity.

[bobby7mc in reply to Denzie]

Thanks Denzie, So much going on.. I am not a medical person, and do not understand much of this.. I do understand her sadness and losing control.. I like your statement about her taking back a piece of what she has lost.. I find myself at a loss for words.. Dont understand a lot of what the doctor says... there is one thing I know is Christ and Him Crucified ...Bobby

[Esthersm]

Hey ,I was in good health, 6 yrs ago I had pneumonia & confirmed stage 4 metastic NSCLC, I am still on Tarceva, had craniotomy , Twice Cyberknife for the recurrent brain tumor. Now , I am on the Avastine infusion for the post radiation necrosis. I drive, except my poor eye sights, otherwise I’m doing pretty well.on top of that I’m also a care giver to my demented husban. Please have some consideration taking that targetd drug, I have a very supported family & support group. Good luck ,& God bless, thoughts & prayers ! Esther

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[bobby7mc]

Thanks Ester.. I I had no idea how many people were suffering from this demon we call cancer.. God Bless you.. Bobby