Dealing with the after affects : hi! I was in a... - ICUsteps

ICUsteps

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Dealing with the after affects

Jjones210519 profile image
6 Replies

hi!

I was in a coma for 7 weeks in early 2021, lots of ptsd thoughts when I woke up, I gained the ability to walk after a week of leaving icu, recovered really well physically.

Fast forward to jan 2023, i tried to kill myself, ended up with multiple organ failure and sepsis from a femoral line In my leg. I don’t remember anything about the event.

Im STILL in hospital unable to walk, only can stand using the rota stand with assistance of 2 staff.

When will this get better I just want to go home!!!

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Jjones210519 profile image
Jjones210519
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6 Replies
Sepsur profile image
Sepsur

You’ll get there again - I’ll send you a DM

I don’t know about you but I’ve always had the tendency to under play everything - “I’m fine, don’t worry about me” sort of thing. 4 yrs after ICU, I hit a wall of darkness and eventually had therapy that led me back out into light & reason. Take care & let us know how you are getting on

Lux95 profile image
Lux95

It takes time. That was me for about 2 weeks after I woke up from sedation - barely standing once or twice a day, but slowly the therapists kept pushing me, and I did more and more. It is hard though - sometimes very hard, but stick with it and be patient.

There is no fast path of recovery. I can only guess, so this is just my opinion, but it sounds like your physical recovery in 2021 led you to think everything was fine, but it wasn't. My physical recovery took a couple of months just to regain the basics (and driving again), but returning to "normal life", i.e. working fulltime with all the stress that brings, was a big mistake.

I don't know if we all go through a mental or emotional crash at some point (I did in a few stages I think), or if some recovery more easily, but I think we all have realized at different times that there is no easy way back and must be patient with ourselves - both physically and mentally.

I completely understand the desire to go home! My physicians and nurses were probably sick of me asking to go home, and laughing at the absurdity of me thinking I could manage at home with a trach tube in my throat, and not even enough strength to pick up the nurse call button. But at the same time, I'm not sure hospital staff understand we aren't just wanting to go home, but wanting to leave the trauma behind us and restore some sense of normalcy, even if it only amounts to standing up and walking across our own bedroom once a day. At least home means something normal has returned. Instead I realized I had to view surviving as more than enough, and recovering the goal. The rest, including going home, will come with time.

Do you have friends and/or family with you?

Back_to_reality profile image
Back_to_reality

You clearly want to get better, which is a good thing, considering what you have been through. When I was in the hospital I was desperate to get out.

Really hope your physical recovery progresses. It does take time and you have to be patient.

Clunk profile image
Clunk

are you getting any physical therapy in the icu / hospital? I would definitely push for it to help you get back on your feet. Recovery takes time but doing a little bit every day will get you far

Misterpaulwood profile image
Misterpaulwood

I was in a induced coma for eight weeks and lost all use of my legs, I thought I'm never getting out of here... You will and things get better, I can now walk again (although not far) but things get that tiny bit better month on month, never lose hope, you will get there.God's grace.

Paul at the Steampacket Inn Knottingley

Jjones210519 profile image
Jjones210519

Hi everyone, I thought I'd give an update. I pushed myself so hard to start walking after writing this post! I finally did my first steps in very early may and I was finally discharged on may 5th. The first day after getting out of the car, I fell trying to get up a kerb so an ambulance came to get me up as I was unable to get up myself. This made me feel so rubbish and in that moment, I realised how hard this recovery would actually be. The feeling still hasn't returned in my left leg due to my wound still being open, (7 months later) however it is nearly closed. Anyway, I was walking with my frame for about a week after leaving the hospital (was the hardest week of my life!!) I couldn't get off the sofa by myself, I still couldn't get off the toilet by myself and I couldnt wash or dress myself properly so I needed help. I got fed up of using my frame as it was hindering my recovery. I got brave and started walking unaided although I still could only move around the house due to extreme breathlessness and pounding heart. I started getting myself washed and dressed independently. I then (after 2.5 weeks after leaving the hospital) started to go out then I took the choice to attempt driving (with my husband and in a car park) I was very worried as my left leg was very very numb and heavy at that point still and it is a manual, however I was fine. In the last week or 2 I've been able to get myself off the floor, walk a reasonable distance and get out of the bath!!! Things are progressing nicely in terms of physically but mentally I am still struggling. Hope reading this gives people hope!!!!

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