If the old pre-illness me met the current me then I dont think he would recognise him and might not want to spend too long over a pint with him. I dont know if anyone else has noticed any behaviour or personaility chnages since they became ill?
Im not sure if its the brain lesions, autoimmune disorders, raging tinnitus etc or the consequent depression, but much of what I liked about me seems to have greatly diminished - the sense of humour, joi de vivre (sic), the quite quick brain, strong concern for others, enjoyment of the little things (like spending an hour watching a bird on the widow sill or eating cake and watching Poirot). I also seem to keep saying inappropriate things or acting in unusual out of character ways. Nothing arrestable! Just kind of annoying, like interrupting people mid-sentence.
I stayed with some friends in London this week (when I went to London Bridge Hospital) and I think I drove them a bit crazy! Maybe I had presumed too much of their friendship whereas I had not known them that long. It felt a bit awkward and so I went to stay with a very old and dear friend (who invited over other old and dear friends) and for the first time in a long while I felt that the old me was beginning to creep back. I also felt the brain fog lift. This friend has a phd in some obscure subject and we chatted about it and I felt that I kind of kept up. Though he might tell a different story! Whereas last week I found that I was struggling to write a shopping list.
I thought that maybe my brain had not gone as far south as I had feared. To Bristol rather than the Isle of Wight! Who knows.
btw forgot to mention in last post that consultant seemd to think I might have sjorgrens as well as the other stuff. Im hoping not.