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On the naughty step

Latest blog from: hopegoesupanddown.blogspot.com - a record of the hope, terror and unknown future faced when the one you love most in the world suffers a brain injury.

I think it is fair to say that I am not that popular in all quarters at the moment.

Having made the decision to give notice to the student house, events came to a head on Monday morning and I brought things forward a bit...to Monday morning!

Essentially I decided not to take Jake back after the weekend, or ever. They say some decisions make themselves, and this certainly feels like one of those times.

Jake's confidence and morale have taken such a hit since Christmas and, together with the overall regression of hard worn improvements since he moved to the student house, I realised that it was crazy to send him back to somewhere that he didn't want to be, that wasn't helping him and that was causing us both so much distress.

Not a universally welcomed decision, but what else could I do?

Of course, this presents all sorts of complications and I get the impression it’s a decision that is not usually made at such short notice, but there you go (there was a bit of a hairy moment where the possibility of Jake being made to go back was mooted, but fortunately this threat seems to have abated).

We're both 'on holiday' this week (big thank you to my colleagues for their support) and from next week we will need to quickly put in place a care and therapy team, together with a joined up plan so that Jake can get back to rehabilitating and I can get back to working and not being in the way!

Korving Towers is not really big enough for this change, but plans are afoot for a move to a larger property and it will be worth being a bit cramped in the short term to know that Jake is getting the level of support that he needs and deserves. I know I will definitely feel and sleep better having him home.

I joke about being on the naughty step, but it is important to stress that this decision has been made completely out of love for my Jake and the genuine desire to do the right thing for us both for the future. On the surface it may seem like a selfish decision, so I do hope everyone understands.

8 Replies

Good luck to you all in this new journey. Remeber to give yourself time out too.


sometimes we need to take a step back before we can move forward, the most important thing is to keep moving, and that you are doing.

Always remember

'I have the right to make up my own mind, and the right to change my mind'


Dorset Charlie.....I knew you had the power....High Five Girlfriend..!!!!! That's the spirit...You so deserve to sleep at night .I am in no doubt that you have done the right thing..! Huge Hugs and Love to you both..x


Oh I so wish I had the words to help! You are both truly amazing and if I lived close by I would happily come and do anything I could for you!

Love & big hugs to you both, Linda xx


sometimes you need someone to step in well done


We are rooting for you....


Well done you! Once things are in place you will feel a lot more settled. Keep up the brilliant work. Best wishes x :-)


life is about choices made by oneself you made yours who am i to judge but i ish you well


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