Introducing Jake: Part One

Latest blog from: hopegoesupanddown.blogspot.com - a record of the hope, terror and unknown future faced when the one you love most in the world suffers a brain injury.

Greetings my hopeful friends. I trust you are having a good week?

Frankly there are a lots of brain injury related things I could have a moan about that have happened in our world this week, but instead I choose to share with you that a little bit more of the fabulous and rather unique brand of lunacy that characterises my husband continues to show itself each day. As I write this it occurs to me that if you have only known Jake or our story since the accident, then you won't know what I mean by that.

To be honest, that makes me a bit sad, as you have missed out on knowing a truly awesome man (so far) and so this blog is all about Jake and what makes him the extraordinary person I love most in the world, with or without a brain injury.

Like so many couples these days, Jake and I met through an online dating site (match.com since you ask). What attracted me to him initially, apart from the foxy photo obviously, was his honesty, intelligence and ability to make fun of himself. He did try for a while to claim that I contacted him first, but I have proof this is not the case. He also exaggerated his height a little on his profile, but don't tell him I told you.

When we spoke on the phone for the first time it was for 2 hours and I laughed for the full 120 minutes for he is a spectacularly silly bugger; a critical attribute for any prospective partner in my humble opinion.

As I got to know Jake more deeply I got to know the sensitive, sometimes vulnerable soul that he hides beneath the humour and the 'proper bloke' persona he projects. Like most men he can occasionally be stupendously thoughtless (sorry chaps, but there it is), but never when it really mattered and I have always known I could count on him to do the right thing; I have always known how important I am to him.

Taking as read his incredible determination, drive and bounce-back-ability that I have written about many times in this blog before, the other significant aspect of Jake's character is that he is a rescuer; an old fashioned, generous, good in a crisis, knight in shining armour and hero.

This is so fundamental to who Jake is it can be seen in every aspect of his pre-TBI life; nobody in Jake's life ever had to get someone in to fix their computer/car/bike; if you had an emergency or a crisis he would drop everything to be there (I have so many examples of this I could share!); he would spend hours doing unrequested online research for someone if they mentioned they were unsure about an important purchase; and he would (and often did) spend his last few pounds treating someone, even if it meant having no money for his lunch the next day. This characteristic can also been seen in the complete career change he made in his 30's (did I mention how brave he is?) going back to school to get a degree and become a radiographer where helping people was the thing he loved most about the role. Oh, and if you know of any old, irritable, ugly and violent cats that need a new home, please don't tell Jake about them, otherwise we'll be adopting again!

How terribly hard it must be for him to be the one that needs rescuing now.

So, this is part one; my perspective. If you are reading this and you knew my Jake before his accident, please share your perspective in the comments box below or send me a (brief!) email and I promise to share this in the next blog.

If you don't know Jake personally yet, I look forward to one day introducing him to you in person. I know you'll love him.

You can read more about our journey at hopegoesupanddown.blogspot.com

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  • I know having to ask for help is one of the hardest things to do, he souds like a great an and you so supportive

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