Brain surgery

[Freespirit86]

Hi I'm new here. Two years ago my husband had to have a emergency craintomy to remove demoid cyst that had got bigger was 5 cm then got to 7cm.Iv struggled for support always holding onto hope that I will get his independence back.

He been diagnosed with dysexecutive syndrome. It's such a mind boggling to watch his highs and lows.

I remeber being told that the journey would be like a rollercoaster. Its it wrong to feel so tired and alone I just need this motion to stop for moment to find myself whom iv lost along the way. We have 3 children and I work . Exhaustion has taken over me. While my husband is doing ok happy to Potter in his little bubble he not a social butterfly he once was he can be rather moody. Doesn't sleep well now. Has a knee injury so he has difficulty walking some days better than others.

I feel like iv whittle on a bit but hi everybody. I'm just looking to have people to talk to.

[Pairofboots]

Hi Freespirit, welcome. This group is full of people with lived experience of brain injury and those that are carers. Feel free to whittle on as much as you like, we have all done it at one time or another, talk about anything, ask about anything, nothing is out of bounds, someone will respond. Remember that you can always contact headway via website, email or during office hours by telephone [phone], they have a lot of information, and are a good point of contact 🍀

[Freespirit86 in reply to Pairofboots]

Thank you

[cat3]

Hi Freespirit. I do sympathise.

The changes in us after brain injury are hard to accept, both for ourselves and for those close to us. And coming to terms with the new version of a partner, especially if coping with work and children, must be so, so draining. And of course there's the loss of that partner's empathy and support.

Do you have any support from others m'love ? I'm wondering whether you're able to take a little respite here & there, if only a few hours spent at a friend's home or that of a family member. I'm guessing your children are still pretty much school age ?

We're always here if you need an ear, whether it's to blow off steam, ask about something, or just to be 'seen' and make a connection . . . . 😐

Cat. x

[Freespirit86 in reply to cat3]

Hi there . I got friends supporting me the best they can. My youngest is 5 nearly 6 and elder 2 children 12 and 10. . I work with sen children so home and work life so very exhausting currently sign off from work with exhaustion but I trying to take that time for me to have some tlc like hair cut etc as iv not done this for past 2 years my main focus was keeping the boys and husband going. I'm trying to seek support but finding people that fully understand is hard . I do struggle to ask for help or to be a burden on people.

I think his roadnof recovery is done. I now got to process it all and find a way forward.

Thanks for the reply.

[cat3]

Asking for help isn't burdensome, especially to people who want to offer support, and work to improve the daily lives of struggling carers and families with nowhere to turn.

As Ian (Pairof boots) suggested, the Headway helpline has the expertise and experience to advise on strategies for managing the after effects of brain injury. I know there are carer's organizations who offer support both practically and emotionally which they can recommend and provide details of.

Please do give Headway a call on freephone 0808 800 2244 during office hours. And remember, asking for help & support is why everyone joins this forum ; it's what we do . . . . no question of being a burden.

Stay in touch m'love ; this had been my safe place, especially on 'dark' days. x💐

[Freespirit86 in reply to cat3]

Thank you I have rang them . I have been given a number to call. I got a long email too aswell with lots of information on. Im taking the steps to get support. Start talk therapy today .Thank you