mentally exhausted and confused : came off... - Headway

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mentally exhausted and confused

Teazymaid profile image
17 Replies

came off antidepressants did it over 17 weeks and thought I was doing well but only bits of me were better . More focused and memory improved . Down side anxious, heart palpitations, very angry, not so good thoughts , self pity though the roof , totally fed up with the constant fight physically etc etc etc …..

The self pity and totally fed up happened after operation on shoulder 2 weeks ago . The rest just grew over the last few months being off the antibiotics .

I came off the meds as emotional dead and empty .

I’m still emotional distant sort of dead but I do something feel tearful but it’s just not me .. I’m wired .

Is this TBI , depression, just life , .Menopause .. ??? I am lost in a body that doesn’t work right and a brain that seems to belong in every spectrum and I have no idea what to do next … sue :(

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Teazymaid
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17 Replies
Letsrock profile image
Letsrock

Oh dear, sue I get the emotional part as it is not me, but it seems to be non-stop. I have not taken the antidepressants that the neuro gave me as I have read what they can do to you. My main reason is I am on my own and was told they made you feel suicidal so don't take if on your own. Yes agreee with the constant fight with the medical profession.

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid in reply to Letsrock

thank you , I have been on them for may year’s before my accident and they got increased after accident as I was terrible . I came off them very slowly because I was emotionally dead .. small things have improved I do actual get a tear in my eyes and I think I’m more alert .. I’m going back on them at a reduced dose and see that happens .. for me historically my suicidal thoughts reduced dramatically on antidepressants But you are right it’s not the same for everyone .. I’ve been dealing with depression for decades but since TBI may head has changed so trying the next chapter with lower doses of antidepressants and see how that works .. the joys of brain injuries sue x

ipes2 profile image
ipes2

I think that our bodies go through so much that when we change drugs etc. our bodies object. I have found my self going on and coming off drugs a few times and never enjoying the experience. The whole thing can be so depressing. I am not sure if this is my mind playing tricks on me! I think the key is to only make little changes slowly and be prepared to go one step backwards when required.

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid in reply to ipes2

thank you .. I was on the antidepressants before TBI but they got increased because of how bad I was after accident. I’m going to go back on them at a reduced level and monitor how I am then .. so difficult to know what to do or what’s causing it . Sue x

Pairofboots profile image
Pairofboots

Hi, I came off one antidepressant some time back, this titrated down over 25 weeks. Can't say overall I noticed, I did become a little more emotional over silly things, but that seems to be lessening. Other emotions have slowly returned. I was worried when I embarked on the reduction, as from my time nursing, the thought then was when you started, you were kept on them, but more recent evidence seems to suggest that after prolonged use they have done their job and potentially cause more problems than good.

In some cases when people try to reduce, they can have a rebound effect, in this case it might be better, for a time to halt the reduction and allow the body to catch-up, before continuing. It would be worth having a chat with your Dr if you feel that how you are feeling is difficult, it may be that you need a lower dose for a time.

TBI, menopause, depression can all cause problems, so best to have a chat with a professional.

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid in reply to Pairofboots

thank you .. since writing original post I have decided to go back on them at a reduced rate ..I agree with everything you said it as a nurse but a mental health support worker and saw a lot ..

it’s how different I am than I was before TBI the emotional dead , anger are possible the worst bits and stopping the meds albeit very slowly hasn’t helped the anger is definitely worse and a little better on the emotional side as I do actually have a tear in my eyes and feel like I could cry forever but that last a few seconds and I’m just sad for feeling like this …

Thank you everyone for your replies as it does help hearing from people who actually know what I’m saying and for me talking back to you all is making me try to understand what I really do feel like not a bombardment of thoughts all out of control …sue x

skydivesurvivor profile image
skydivesurvivor

been there! All the symptoms!! All I can offer is u will get through it!! I too am emotionally numb, glad of it as went through divorce, menopause, death of friends of old and both parents. One was my cater until I became hers when she developed Alzimers!! 4 surviving kids only me and David visited her whilst in hospital the last 8 weeks of her life, the other two came the night she was due to die?!!! Experience challenges us! Mane developed us too? Am glad the bad traits have been able to discard?!! Find it in u to become a nicer, tolerant new you? Got a second chance for a reason? Use it to find a more rewarding life? I am, good luck

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid

thank you .. I am trying so hard to find the new me emotionally that is .. I’m just very confused but will get there some how .. pleased your new you with the deadness helped you though some very difficult times .. I would be over the moon if I’d lost old memories that would have transformed my life… I’m very driven to get better with the physical side of my accident but my brain’s feelings are like having another person in my head with the old one reacting to a new bazar bits .. though my life I’ve had to fight to survive mentally and I’ve none it .. just very much fed up fighting now .. and then stick the menapause it that for good luck 😉 😂. Sue x

gr33nmind profile image
gr33nmind

I know it has been 4 months, but did you slowly ween yourself off of the meds, or did you just quit them. I was taking an antidepressant for 20 odd years. It took me 4 months to finallly quit them. I had used an extremely slow process called water titration. If you didn't you could be suffering from Serotonin syndrome, and it could be an effect of withdrawal. It could also be caused by your TBI. IDK

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid in reply to gr33nmind

it took 17 weeks to withdraw from them . And I felt ok while I was coming off them

gr33nmind profile image
gr33nmind in reply to Teazymaid

Yes, 17 weeks is just about the time period I went through. I titrated one percent a day, and then about a week for the final one percent. It could just be learning to understand the new you. The new you with a TBI, and off of the medication. It possibly could also be health/menopause related. Still I really don't think it is medication related, especially if you feel the same way. I would probably speak to a medical professional about this. If you don't want to go back on medication, just make sure to tell them before you begin therapy.

catrabb1t profile image
catrabb1t

hi there, horrible for you. I have had similar questions myself. I found that it is impossible to differentiate exactly what condition is causing what symptom. I got good advice on hormones and realised i needed hrt. I am supplying you with the info I have gleaned in case you want to follow this up yourself. If it hadn't been for Covid and lockdowns I would have contacted my GP earlier to discuss menopause. As it happened I felt so bad that when I had my head injury it affected me getting help as I was fobbed off a few times and i felt so bad in general that i deteriorated over a few months until i collapsed because I was so low.

If you are on Facebook there is a private support group which answers your questions (The HRT Truth Collective). This group also has a website (Menopause Not Mad), but the Support group is a much better option. (The links are below). The organiser Jane Pangbourne and her team offer private consults (choice of email or zoom) if you want one and they supply bespoke written info for you to take to your GP which is useful for women who have a complex case history or if their GP is uneducated and not on board with the need for hrt. I have not needed this service as the Facebook support forum and the info Guides helped me to approach my GP and to ask what I wanted.

I have probably been in peri menopause for 10 years and always thought it was mental/emotional struggles although I really knew it was hormonally related due to the patterns. I had never had a GP who cared enough to help me. It is well-known that many peri-menopausal women are misdiaganosed with mental health problems and given antidepressants. I have found a low dose of antidepressant helps me along with HRT. I had to wean down my dose because of similar issues to you and drowsiness.

The list of symptoms for hormone imbalance/deficiency has a lot. Nobody can really know if you need hrt because blood tests do not always show a true picture as hormones fluctuate so much, the NICE guidelines say that GPs must go on your symptoms. Hormones come with little risk so it seems logical to try them if you have symptoms and if they do not suit you then you can stop. Nowadays, the hormones are body identical and are sourced from yams (not from the urine of pregnant mares like years ago). Body identical hormones are natural, tested and regulated. (Note bio identical hormones are different and are not considered as safe and are chemically synthesised in a lab, even when made of plants).

Not only does a balance of hormones help mental/emotional health, but they give long-term protection from cardiovascular disease, osteoporosis, diabetes and dementia (and breast cancer if you are on estrogen only hormones). The risk of blood clots and breast cancer is tiny. There is a choice of ways in how you take the oestrogen and progesterone (you need progesterone if you have a womb or if you still have bleed). Some women need testosterone, a blood test for this is required. Testosterone has its own info trail that you can learn if it applies to you (GPs are licenced to only supply it for low libido in women). A woman can begin hrt at any point in her life and age is not a qualifying factor.

Hopefully that gives you some helpful info. Believe me, I was confused as hell with all the info and almost didn't go for it and I am very happy that I did. Many of my symptoms are improved/gone. Most women feel confused/over-whelmed at the start and its good to have support. Not knowing your body well because of its fluctuations and brain injury makes is hard! If you want to private message me about it, please do.

See my next post for the list of symptoms and the online links.

catrabb1t profile image
catrabb1t in reply to catrabb1t

Website (with offer of a consultation appointment): menopausalnotmad.co.uk/symp...

Facebook group (free support with offer of a consultation appointment): facebook.com/groups/hrtandh...

List of the most common symptoms:-

Hot flushes

Night sweats

Cold flushes

Sore breasts

Headaches

Digestive issues

Bleeding gums

Bloating

Inability to Concentrate

Vertigo

Dizziness

Facial hair

Clammy Skin

Heart palpitations

Low mood/depression

Mood swings

Erratic periods

Low libido (sex drive)

Electric shock feelings

Itchy skin

Leakages/bladder issues

Poor memory

Lack of focus & brain fog

Dry or irritated vagina

Aching joints/muscles

Tense muscles

Ringing ears (tinnitus)

Weak fingernails

Bad breath

Changes in body odour

Tearfulness

Disturbed sleep/Insomnia

Fatigue

Anxiety

Allergies (new or increased)

Burning tongue/mouth

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid in reply to catrabb1t

thank you so much for your reply you sound just like me not knowing where it all comes from sue x

catrabb1t profile image
catrabb1t in reply to Teazymaid

Yes it is a minefield. My goal every day now is to remember to take the hormones and my SSRI, it literally is a daily conquest!!

paxo05 profile image
paxo05

Hi. I came off antidepressants years ago. It took time and I had support from my gp to deal with my depression along the way. Counselling was a big help.Depending where your bi is could also explain emotions being strange.

Mine are all mixed up. I can end up laughing instead of crying and the other way around.

Make sure you have support dealing with why you were on antidepressants in the first place.

Pax

Teazymaid profile image
Teazymaid in reply to paxo05

thank you .. and yes I’ve had a lot of counselling pre TBI Which has helped immensely though my 25 years plus .. and the antidepressants helped with my suicidal thoughts and I had tried to come off them a few years ago but crashed with the suicidal thoughts once again so I stopped the withdrawal and settled down back on them .. it’s just changed drastically since TBI With emotional dead and anger being the worst .. I am going to go to the GP see if they can help .. suex

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