not like me i know,but feeling very sad today.i guess just stuff have had to deal with.slept last night in the ,"green room",no carpet yet but perfect sleep with new bedding,got a dog bed socks was happy.im not sure if sleeping in seans old room or the ever pressing matter of a need to take control of his life p.o.a/c.o.p.this is a massive issue for me.this is because i have a big problem.i cant even control my life,much less my sons,who may or may not(depending)have "capacity".i have a conflict,there are so many things..im tired of fighting with people who say they understand,when how could they possibly?who would know?how could someone out of uni be more qualified?it makes no sense...i want to be shouting at him for running everywhere at 110 m.p.h.the girls he sneaked into house when i was at work,the days after the night before(loads of them).i would give anything to have them times back,but i cant,is it wrong to feel as i do?im angry ,who wouldnt be?..
feeling low...: not like me i know,but feeling very... - Headway
feeling low...
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Hi D, no it’s not like you your normally quite positive, but we all feel fed up and wish we could turn the clock back at times. It must be quite a frightening thought to be in control of someone else’s life, we don’t necessarily prepare our own to that extent but at least as Sean’s mum you will only do what you think he would want. If his mum can’t be trusted then we are all lost. It’s a lot of added pressure for you my friend, but you’ve protected him up to now just have to see it as an extension of that lots of luck and love Alice xx
Lesley .....you tell it like it is, and your honesty and humour have been heroic this past two years. But expending so much emotional energy on staying positive and keeping vigilant can chip away at your own welfare over time.
It's so important to adopt an upbeat stance, both for ourselves and those reliant on us, but when our emotional batteries are worn out, running on empty can end in tears.
If you can manage a short break from decorating, planning, reorganizing etc., and just clear your head of everything, at least for a couple of days, some temporary respite might benefit both you and Sean ? I hope so m'love,
Thinking of you ; love & hugs, Xx
Hi DBH,Normally you pretty much sound like the energizer bunny.
Even if you do naturally have a lot of energy, I know myself I used to get busy to stop thinking too much.
Since injury brain no longer races like that but I still get the urge to stress clean or whatever ,generally meaning things get spilled or broken and then the energy crash.
I have had to learn to take frequent rest breaks, and realize sitting ( or laying) still doing nothing is also a legitimate and meaningful activity.
Sometimes it helps to have a restful distraction or to hear a voice you don't have to listen to - lots of stuff on youtube - a lovely carpet cleaner in Poland who cleans old carpets, life in a village in Azerbaijan where the couple usually makes food outside- no music, just sounds of country life . A mini mental holiday. Something will appeal- birds singing in the forest, rain falling, etc.
You too are allowed to do nothing. Sometimes it is necessary.
Otherwise people have a tendency to go til they crash.
Please take care of yourself.
I am not surprised you get wrung out Sometimes- anyone would .
Feelings come and go like the weather, and only get to be problems when they hang on too long. So, have a good cry if you need to feel better . Or, as my little niece used to recommend- bite your pillow.
No, you can't control your life, or your son's
What is so is that no one is in control. We all fake it. Just some of us know we are faking.
You can still take one day at a time and just do what you can. That's really the best any of us have.
And, you are processing the visit from the lads.
Big virtual hug to you and Socks.
Leaf x
You are not alone. I have been feeling high and low for a few months now. I had to go to the COP to take control of my husband’s money matters. It’s hard to tackle finances when you hate figures and using technology like I do. But the help of C my daughters I had to do it. Rollercoaster of infection problems and moving from rehab units to home eventually has been an everyday fight. Difficult or impossible to have any respite in my case. But the show must go on. Try and enjoy the few dry days thrown at us. Perhaps you can go on some nice walks with your dog. A walk in the fresh air today with carer pushing my husband in his wheelchair did me a lot of good. All the best to all those of you out there feeling low with winter time and the rain. Only 4 months till springtime.
We can't avoid having bad days. This illness continues to encourage me to surrender, let things go, and to "Flow with the Go." However impossible it feels, accepting my kids have their own path and guidance is the only thing that keeps my sanity. I am sending you a big virtual hug.
Hi Missus. How're things today ? Any better ? I hope so.... Xx
Hi D, hope your feeling better, your one of the strong ones we rely on, you’ve been through such a lot over the last couple of years it’s not surprising it’s all catching up with you. I hope you have good support in the family that you can bounce off when needed, we all need a shoulder, always in my thoughts love Alice xx